Slappy's Angels 4: The Quest for More Money

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Region 1 DVD cover for the film
Taglines:
  • Fanning the flames of fury...
  • Four times the action, four times the original budget
  • Based very loosely on a true story
Writers Skippy Squirrel
Starring
Producers Oscar Wilde, Skippy Squirrel
Director Skippy Squirrel
Runtime Sixty (60) minutes
Language English
Distributed by Fox Bros. Network
IMDb rating http://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/e/ed/Youtubestar.pnghttp://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/e/ed/Youtubestar.pnghttp://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/e/ed/Youtubestar.pnghttp://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/e/ed/Youtubestar.pnghttp://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/6/69/Youtubestar1.pnghttp://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/6/69/Youtubestar1.pnghttp://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/6/69/Youtubestar1.pnghttp://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/6/69/Youtubestar1.pnghttp://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/6/69/Youtubestar1.pnghttp://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/6/69/Youtubestar1.png

Slappy's Angels 4: The Quest for More Money is a 2020 film, and yet another pointless addition to the already overstretched Slappy's Angels franchise. However, the film still retains much of the original cast of the first film, quite surprising for a franchise, and returns to the original idea of dramatising an actual event, in this case, the Flame War between Minerva Mink and Microsoft.

Plot[edit]

The film takes place 8 years after the TV series. The A.N.G.E.L.S. have long disbanded due to financing problems, and have gone their separate ways. Skippy has become a famous director of crap films nobody would watch in a million years, Lola is now a sports icon, Minerva has returned to fashion modelling while Slappy is left to enjoy her retirement, with Andy now serving as her carer outside of work.

One morning, an emergency meeting is called at the top-secret headquarters of the Uncyclomedia Foundation. The head of the organization, Phyllis Stein, reports that a spate of attacks on the company have been made via the Internet, and a group of unidentified terrorists are using flames to transmit codes via Uncyclopedia, making the company an unwilling partner in crime. With Superman under arrest and Captain America dead, they decide to call the A.N.G.E.L.S.

Across the globe, an urgent message comes out, rallying the A.N.G.E.L.S. together. Each one agrees to the reunion, and set out individually to rendezvous. All except Minerva arrive safely, and there are fears that Minerva may have been kidnapped, or even worse, held up by survey ladies in the Mall. Putting their friend before their country (except for Andy, who is British and not American as people usually think), they set out to trace Minerva's steps before she disappeared.

Meanwhile, Minerva has indeed been captured, and it is by the terrorists who are running the show. Their leader, Bill Gates, explains that Microsoft has been gaining power over the years, but not enough to put to any use. And after letting his troops grape Minerva (grape, not rape, as there was a bunch of them), explains that he has placed a bomb inside the HQ of the Uncyclopedia Foundation, which will detonate automatically at 11:30 and release noxious gas across the United States of America and kill all known life.

Minerva at the mercy of her captors, yet still finds time to pose for the camera.

As Gates escapes to his gas-proof bunker in New York, the rest of the A.N.G.E.L.S. arrive and free the weakened Minerva, but are forced to face the secret weapon of Microsoft, a killer robot named Cyballs (played by Kim Jong-Il), accompanied by the standard Monkey Ninjas. After a gruelling fight, in which Skippy gets a black eye, Lola gets her ass fingered and Andy sprains his penis, Cyballs and the Ninjas are easily defeated.

Heading after Gates, the A.N.G.E.L.S. are able to de-activate the bomb and take it with them as they chase the renegade to the ends of the Earth, eventually arriving in Egypt, where Lola recognises an old legend that if a sacrifice was made to the goddess Bast, the person responsible would receive a great spiritual power known only as More Money, which would turn anything into gold for just ten minutes.

They track Gates to the temple, where he is about to sacrifice Judge Judy. The A.N.G.E.L.S. stop him, but accidentally kill an innocent little cricket during the interruption. Bast appears before them, and grants the power of More Money to Minerva, who had killed the cricket, and uses her brief power to turn Gates into gold. Afterward, they return to America drop the bomb into the air conditioning of the Microsoft offices, melt down Gates for value, and live happily ever after in one of the shortest film endings in history.

UnCritical Reaction[edit]

Upon it's release, reviewers saw the film as a mixed bag. Some criticised it for being too much like the original Slappy's Angels film, and for it's misleading title. "It wasn't a quest at all," argues Your Mom of U.S.A. Today. "The A.N.G.E.L.S. were brought unintentionally to find More Money by a villain who seems to have just had a backup plan come straight out of his frigging pocket!".

Others, however, saw the film as an improvement from the previous straight-to-video release, Slappy's Angels: 10 Seconds to Armageddon. Roger Ebert, who has always been praising of the franchise, wrote of the film: "Minerva's always wanted her big break in showbiz, and now those assholes at Fox Bros. have given it to her. Armageddon was an OK film, but a British wiki writer doesn't seem like leading-role material compared to a white-furred mink with tits the size of Texas."

Despite the varying opinions, almost all reviewers are of the same belief that the Slappy's Angels franchise is getting a little too old for the cinema, and that the cast and crew should look elsewhere.

Cast[edit]


Trivia[edit]

  • Originally, Bast was scripted to play herself, but couldn't make it due to a prolonged bout of Irritable Bowel Syndrome.
  • Because she is such a stroke-faced slurry, Lindsay Lohan couldn't properly lip-sync to the dialogue for the part of Phyllis, which was provided off-stage by an uncredited Oscar Wilde.
  • Humour suited to a fictitious movie's trivia section is a challenge.
  • The addition of The Quest for More Money was made at the eleventh hour. This subtitle led many viewers to believe that the A.N.G.E.L.S. were going to take on the IRS.

See Also[edit]