Slippers, A brief History Of
Slippers were invented on day one of Gods creation of The Earth, as he needed something to keep his feet warm when he was walking to his fridge to get a beer as he had not yet created the sun. His high alcohol intake was probably why some people tunred out looking like they did. Nevertheless, the slippers were hailed as a great invention, and Queen Elizabeth The Second, once she started her reign in 156 AD boasted that she had the grandest pair of slippers in the land. This started a growing trend and upper class men and women strived to earn a good pair of slippers. So the foot race began (Notice the pun).... After several years of this foot race, Slippers were outlawed due to increased violence in order to gain slippers. Various superstores were over run by angry shoppers trying to gain slippers and so selling slippers was punishable by death. However, in 1938, in loom of the Second World Whore Hitler (The first being Mary Magdeline) Slippers were legalised as it was seen that cast numbers of Germans, in case of an invasion of Britain could have their progress hindered by slippers. The plan was to give the Germans slippers as welcoe gifts when they got into Britain, but the slippers would have sharks and lions hidden at strategic points inside the slipper, thus hindering the German advance.
Future of The Slipper
The future of the slipper is an uncertain one. With several countries fighting over slipper dealing rights in countries the chances of a war escalating over it are becoming more and more real and actions may be taken by the UN, resulting in the US becoming the only "legal" slipper dealer as they will tell the UN in polite, (or unpolite terms if Dick Cheney is allowed his hunting rifle) To "Fuck off." This could end one of the worlds greatest legacies, the slipper.