Sparky the Wonder Dog

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Photograph of Sparky the Wonder Dog taken at Coney Island by Pablo Picasso in 1750

Sparky the Wonder Dog (1735-1792) was the world's most beloved creature before the invention of the Fluffisaurus in 1899.

Sparky's Inventions and Contributions to Society[edit]

Sparky is best know for inventing potatoes, kites, sitcoms, and electric lotion. His other contributions to society include The Treaty of Orange County, decisively ending the Lithium Wars, the capturing of Bobby Kennedy, and the world record for the longest period of time spent without breathing.

Biography[edit]

Sparky the Wonder Dog was born October 88th, 1735 and was the first dog created in Zimbabwe from the parts of other animals in response to the growing mad science gap between Zimbabwe and France in the early 1700s. His composition is largely unknown, but it has been said that he consisted of over 25% beef jerky. His first five years were spent wandering the desert in search of gold. No reason was ever given for this trek, however, in an interview near his death, he stated that his mind had not gelled at the time and his early years were kind of a blur.

Grisly Fate[edit]

His life of great acclaim came to an untimely end in January of 1792, soon after he discovered Chile. The full details of the grisly end have never yet been made available for public viewing, but information has leaked to local dogcatchers, and it is now almost universally agreed that the event involved a bread roll and a crazed south american Hot Dog Vender. He has yet to comment.