Stone Temple Pilots
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Stone Temple Pilots were a well known Hitler Youth choir group that experienced phenomonal success in the early nineties, with a record 67 of their songs making the Billboard Hot 100 chart and scoring a Grammy award for their track, "Plush". The original track was named "Beanie Baby", but the band was threatened by a lawsuit from the Ty corporation so they changed it to its current title, an ode to the plush teddy bear in which lead singer Scott Weiland kept his stock of heroin.
[edit] Personnel
- Scott Weiland-vocals- Has the ability to impersonate Eddie Vedder and a small kitten while dancing like a drunk black man. He can only live with at least 10kg of drugs per hour.
- Dean Deleo-guitar- Able to turn himself from young man, to an old wrinkley senior citizen within 10 years. Appears to have a black eye. Fantastic guitarist anyway.
- Robert Deleo -bass- He can play the bass very well. Yep.
- Eric Kretz-drums- Gifted with the ability to bang things really hard of course not in a sexual way
[edit] History
The conception of STP can be traced back to July 17, 1918, when the Romanov family was murdered. One of the Soviet soldiers present at the event, named Tom Green, built a whimsical machine called a Megazord out of Anastasia's blood stained clothing. Tom used his invention to help him write the Bum Bum Song.
Many decades after the tragedy, a group of teenagers living in Los Angeles, California were called upon by Mr. Green to continue his Power Rangers legacy. They decided to form a band instead. Weiland, whose name isn't really Weiland at all (it's Jesus or something; pronounced 'hey-zeus'), was never not strung out on coke for even a period of five minutes. His disorientation led him to evolve into a sort of Eddie Vedder clone, and sometimes Layne Staley and Chris Cornell on good days.
With the powers receieved, they began a journey to start Jewish Nazi Revolution and multiple hiatuses.
[edit] The Beef Between Weiland and Axl Rose
In June 2004, the popular tabloid, CosmoGirl, produced a small article on Weiland's new band, Velvet Revolver. Claiming that Weiland was the "...most excellent snake-dancer who sports skinny jeans, lol..." it also included an array of advice contributed by Weiland regarding drug abuse, nudist colonies and skin care products. After the article was published, Guns n' Roses frontman/ex-frontman/born-again-frontman/groupie/menapausal wife Axl Rose filed lawsuit against CosmoGirl and Scott Weiland claiming that slander and sexual assault were used to stunt the popularity of Chinese Democracy, Rose's not-yet-released-and-probably-never-will-be autobiography, which touched subjects such as his life in the Thai mafia and 100 Ways to Procrastinate in Life.
