Super Human Freaks

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Super Human Freaks are everywhere so it is difficult to explain what or who they are because any information given about them would be wiped from your memory by tiny bugs.

NOTE: For more information on Super Human Freaks see Bill Gates.


The Super Human Freaks race was allegedly formed during the early fifteenth century by an American scientist called Gunter Hlaf. Gunter Hlaf decided that the world needed some excitement so he started to breed, within a secret laboratory in Romania, a race of genetically modified humans that could annoy, irritate and just generally piss off unsuspecting civilians. Sadly for Gunter, somebody found out what he was doing within the lab. The Romanian woman who found him told the police who then proceeded to burn the entire family of Gunter Hlaf in case of infection. Gunter fell into a deep case of depression and proceeded to kill himself.

Two hundred and fifty years later Gunters Labratory was unearthed from a pile of human waste and the scheme was revived. Herbert Hitler (no relation to Adolf Hitler) proceeded to breed the army of wierdos for the rest of his life. He then left a message in his will for a bloke in Canada to continue the work.

This Canadian bloke decided that as he had never met Herbert Hitler before in his life he would not continue work on the Super Human Freaks project. Unfortunately, at the age of 77 Mr. Wilkinson, the Canadian, visited the Romanian laboratory and found, to his horror, an army of over 300 million freaks. He immediately ran from the building, accidentally leaving the door open behind him. Sadly, these Freaks noticed and escaped Romania.

Since that day the Freaks have dispersed across the globe and continue to reproduce in destructive numbers. Some Freaks become sad and kill themselves but others torment us by continuing to live. Some even achieve international notoriety for their evil deeds. One freak, Bill Gates, was bored one day so decided to give himself a strangely irritating voice and invent a system called Windows that would destroy the lives of many men.

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