Template:UnNews Quick weather

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Worldwide Forecast at a Glance:

  • Alaska to experience a heat wave, next week, in the upper -20's Celsius.


  • Starting in Asia, it'll be misty tomorrow as if the mist were hugging the ground like an over-affectionate and rather damp dog.

  • Starting tonight in Brazil, it should rain in drops the size of a wrestler. But fortunately, most of the rain will not quite reach the ground.

  • In Texas, excessive rear end inflow may cause bulging tops in vertically erect systems and later cause overshooting tops.

  • In summary, it is expected to be a bad-hair day for Oscar Wilde.

Special Weather Report:

Yo mama is so fat, she caused the last ice age.

Global Warming Indicator

If you were to find the population of penguins and divide that by the ratio of butterflies to macacs, you would get a number no where near the accuracy of this forecast.