Tetra

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Tetra is from the popular series The Legend Of Zelda. Tetra is Zelda in disguise. Unlike other princessess "Tetra" is too self concious to go out in public as Zelda therefore making her crossdress once again to look more guyish than most men should. When Link dumped Zelda, she couldnt stand not getting any action in the bed so she was forced to go in disguise. For some reason Zelda gets a tan whenever she changes into Tetra. Oh well, I guess thats the kind of consequence you get when all you do is get raped by an evil villian who can transform into Ganon anytime therefore making his manly parts even larger. In a recent interview, Zelda described it as if a train were going into her and ripping her soul apart. Werid how she smiled after.

Appearances[edit]

Tetra first appeared in the Windwaker as a young crazy pirate in the middle of the ocean. Her parents were very angry when they heard that Zelda was going to get a sex change. To most people it may look like shes still a girl, but if she can go from outward to flat when she transforms to Shiek, who knows what changes when she changes to Tetra. Anyways, once again she needed help doing something and once again some random guy named Link pops out of no where and sees his "opportunity". And by that, im talking about what goes on behind the scenes. She also appeared in the cheap sequel the Phantom Hourglass. In this one, Link is still traveling with her because Tetra needs someone to "practice" on in the middle of the ocean. And since the other crew members can all asexually reproduce due to the fact that they are aliens from like Mars, they dont need Tetra. Tetra also appeared in another gameish sort of thing called Tetras Trackers made by more japanese people (why does america never get to do anything?). Heres a screenshot [1] Althoug she didnt know that she was Zelda, she wears a piece of the triforce around her frickin neck! wtf.

Connections to Others[edit]

Link

Link is Tetras main companion in the Phantom Hourglass. For some reason Link cannot recognize that Tetra is Zelda even though they have been together in like 10 frickin games!! Tetra recently announced that she is pregnant with a baby that they will name Navi after Links fairy who stalks him constantly.

"Daltus"

Daltus first appeared in The Minish Cap. When Zelda got turned to stone, he was sad because he said her nipples were "too hard and sandpapery". Although he says hes her father, he is actually Zeldas mother, Paula Abdul. Now we know why Zeldas is so damn ugly.

"The crew"

The crew refers to the people who are with Tetra on her boat. They are actually a bunch a aliens from a distant planet called upon by the ocean king so that he can spy on her and post her affairs with Link on PooTube. The crew does have one noticeable character though. He is often seen smoking and shooting heroine. Also he is know to read Asexual Weekly

This is Tetras crew. The one reading the book. Thats him.