The Befteling

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The Befteling is a small village in Brabant whose inhabitants are a diverse mixture of fairytale creatures, such as Trolls, Smurfs and Beflijsters. The sole purpose of the Befteling is to supply the necessary pornographic actors for cheap Dutch porn movies. The Befteling is well known for its never ending competition with Ponypark Schaamharen (Pony park Pubic hairs) and Sex Flags Holland also known as Walibido World.

Famous inhabitants of the Befteling:

  • Lange Jan (Long John) actually known for his long penis (not his neck).
  • Grote Smurf (Big Smurf, recognised by his red tight pants).
  • Smurfin (Female Smurf, Recognised by her long blonde hair, falling out of her pants).
  • George W. Bush (for his monkey-like appearance).
  • The family of Laaf who got their name because of their "laf" (cowardly) behaviour.
  • Vogel Ruk a huge jerk-off of a bird who carries stones.
  • TepelStreeltje Nobody know's, nobody know's...that his name isn't Repelsteeltje...
  • DoornDoosje (Cindy Rella) A lousy girl.. all she does is sleeping..
  • Trollenkong A hairy old guy stolen from a movie
  • Jesus

Departments in the Befteling:

The Befteling is also well known for its Python, a very long snake. Python is always bragging to Lange Jan about him being longer than Jan's penis. This led to a curious incident in 1997 in which European Union moderators were brought in to adjudicate in rival claims, and the Portuguse representative, a Senhor Gonçalves, was sucked up Lange Jan's back passage, screaming and shrieking and making all sorts of carry-on. He was rescued two years and five months later but had become a pale wreck of his former self, and smelt funny.