The Grinch

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Jake Matheson-Miller
No image
Date of birth: November 1957
Place of birth: Mt. Crumpett, Whoville
Nationality: Australian
Known for Looking like The Grinch, Stealing Christmas, Ruining events.
Occupation Grinch
Religion Grinch

“Grinchy!”

~ Ben Galik on The Grinch

“He called me a coon! ... Bloody Grinch!”

~ David Brookes on The Grinch

“Jake Matheson-Miller is The Grinch and he stole my courage GRRR!!!”

~ Andrew Brown on The Grinch

“I am not The Grinch Andrew is!”

~ Jake Matheson-Miller(The Grinch)

“The Grinch is green”

~ Captain Obvious on The Grinch

Contents

[edit] History

The Grinch (born Jake Matheson-Miller) is the worst super-villian in the history of the earth. His reign of terror on Christmas day started on Christmas of 1957 where an young Grinch crept out of his house and slashed the tyres of Santa's sleigh. Each year he willfully ruins Christmas for thousands in the area chasing Santa out away from Blackwood. He ruins Christmas for everyone in a 10k vicinity of Trentham and also Daylesford. More recently on the Christmas of 2005 Andrew Brown woke up to the smell of morning spuds. He ran over to the Christmas Tree to find nothing, he started to cry until he asked his dad Trevor what had happened. His dad said that The Grinch had stolen their Christmas, listining to this his prick of a brother Nathan laughed at Andrew. Andrew replied "what do you care Nathan you don't do anything". Another victim of The Grinch is a young boy nicknamed Steiny. He woke up that morning also to find no presents (but in reality the presents were indeed big stumps of premium wood)Steiny then bared his teeth and proceeded to eat the Xmas tree instead.As Andrew he was distraught vowed revenge againest The Grinch. The grinch was at his home burning the wood he stole from Steiny whilst brother Kyle (his minion) did the hahka dance behind him. As well as stealing Christmas The Grinch also ruins event's such as Easter where he robs the Easter Bunny of his eggs and blocking his entrance to homes, and giving him noogies. He also has some retarded dog, that he put sticks on its head for some reason. Then rides down into the town, every christmas or christmas eve and steals everyones presents. Later this year The Grinch is going to Escape The Fate which makes him feel superior to the rest of us even though he is the lowest card in the pack.

Main victim of The Grinch

[edit] Alternate Theory

Jake Matheson-Miller always denies being The Grinch when told that he is The Grinch. Sometimes he claims that Andrew is The Grinch but this statement is rarely belived. I guess that Andrew could possibly be The Grinch but realistically he is too involved in his family's spud business. Otherwise The Grinch is obviously Jake Matheson-Miller as known by everyone in Daylesford Secondary College.

[edit] Other Activities

Apart from Grinching around The Grinch also engages in playing AFL, he also goes to school because at this stage in his life he has to, eating glass, sandwich making, using cane toads as ninja stars. A character of his selfish profile doesn't care about the town below his mountain so he scares anyone off his property if they trespass. Since he comes from Blackwood he is stereotyped as a Bogan which could be a source of his anger angainst predjudice.

[edit] Allies

He is apparently joining a league of international Supervillains so that he can be recognised in his plight against the joyful holiday of Christmas. So far this process has been delayed beacuse of the incredible amount of bureaucrats in this orginisation.

Inductee's include

The leader of The Grinch's evil orginisation
How The Grinch will die.

and, of course

[edit] Minions

[edit] Brother Kyle

Brother Kyle on a good day.

Main Article Brother Kyle

Brother Kyle is the main minion of The Grinch he is willing to do whatever The Grinch tells him. On Christmas night he is the one who makes sure the people in houses don't beat up The Grinch sorta like a bodyguard. Every other day he tries to cover up The Grinches identity and repair his stuff. One Christmas The Grinch hi-jacked the sleigh and took Santa Claus hostage. Brother Kyle is also known as the main player in The Grinches budding drug empire he scares the customs officers into submission and waves The Grinch through.

[edit] Enemies

This list could go on for a while so here are main people who think he's a prick.

What the world thinks of the grinch

[edit] Andrew "Notorious" or "Spuds" Brown

Andrew Brown
Turf of Karl and Andy

His most notable enemy is Andrew Brown [brown eye] the spud farmer every year The Grinch ruins his Christmas and he is just sick of it. Christmas eve for this guy is basically drinking spud nog and hoping that The Grinch doesn't wreck havoc this year. Apart from The Grinch stealing his Christmas his other main problem is that no one in Bullarto buys his spuds. He believes that people from Bullarto don't like proper spuds that arn't squishy. He claims that he does many more thinks apart from digging spuds, but really it's just a life of Table Tennis and spud digging for him. Also Andrew and his Family own 31 tracktors 14 cars and 7 motorbikes, because whenever his dad gets like 20 grand he buys a tracktor. Usually this starts an argument between his parents about money.

Late in 2008 he was playing a school computer game called "Baggin the Dragon" his opponent The Grinch stole his courage BASTARD. Andrew was distraught when this had happend. He will hold it against The Grinch forever. But the very next week they had a play off and Andy Brown purchased a cannon and shot himself over the board and landed on the "Courage". The Grinch then proceeded to say that he was the Grinch. But as he was saying it there was an evil green twinkle in his eye.

[edit] The Flying Turk aka Karl Walker

Easily the coolest guy in Lyonville (Well err ... hes like the only guy in Lyonville) is another lifelong victim of The Grinch complaining that he is way too black to have Christmas robbed from him. Little does he know The Grinch is a racist well he doesn't leave black people alone. The Flying Turk is also an ally of Andrew so that he stands a chance against The Grinch. Other things he has in common with Andrew is that they are both black (well Andrew thinks he is and so does everyone else) and they are also both pimps. These two brotha's have too many hoe's to count. Among other things The Flying Turk enjoys playing lawn bowls which instantly classifies him as an old man despite being about 16 years old.

[edit] Grinch Control Commity

This orginsation has decided to stop The Grinch once and for all and is aiming to shoot down The Grinch on Christmas Eve 2009. Failure will result in extreme tactics to get rid of him. They hope for a Grinch free world every day just to make sure it works. Members from all over the state are joining including The Grinch's arch nemises Andrew Brown who is spearheading the project. Other notable member's include: Jack Francis, Budda, Steiny, Jake Sartori (Despite being allied to The Grinch in an all Jake alliance). Everyone in the towns of: Blackwood, Trentham, Daylesford, Malmsbury and Ballan is expected to join before October 15th 2009.

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