Things People Hate

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Hate. It's the stuff that makes the world go round. Money was invented when people decided they hated trading. Cars were invented because Americans hate moving. War exists mainly because people hate each other. See all of the wonderful things hate can bring? In light of this fact, I have decided to make an article that consists of a list of things people hate, and why they hate them. Isn't that lovely? I have added a few things myself to get the list started, but I invite anyone and everyone who reads this article to add to it, if you can't think of a new topic to add, don't be afraid to add on to a subheading that already exists. All I ask is that if you do add a topic, you make sure to add a nice juicy rant beneath it. In fact it doesn't even have to be juicy. Frankly I don't care if its only one sentence, just add something. This is for two main reasons. First of all, despite the heading below, this article is not simply a list, it is a place for people to rant and lose all of that hate they have onto the world. Second of all, it's much more funny to read. Now get to it, it's time to make the world a better place and Spread the Hate!


THE LIST[edit]

Pointless Comments[edit]

  • FIRST!
  • Don't read this! If you don't repost this stupid chain message to 100 other wikis in the next 5 minutes, your nose will grow 10 feet long and you will have bad luck, yadda yadda yadda.
  • <insert quote from video here>!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Ha!!!!!!!!!1!

You guys are so sexy.

People who are too easily offended[edit]

I started with this topic intentionally as a kind of disclaimer. The disclaimer is this, if you are offended by this article in any way, I hate you. That being said I would also like to congratulate you, by being so easily hateable you have helped to Spread the Hate, you have made the world a better place, and you have therefore helped me in achieving my ultimate goal. For this I would like to thank you. Basically to wrap things up, if you are offended by this article you have made me a very happy person, and you should feel welcome to add this article to the list! The above does not hold true if you know where I live and/or are in possession of a gun, in that case I feel deeply for your emotional distress and am possibly dead.... Fuck it, bring it on faggots!

The question is, does this image apply to the "People Who Text While They are Driving" post or the one just below it?

People Who Text While They are Driving[edit]

Honestly do I need to say why this is on the list. Do I actually need to EXPLAIN why this is smart?! Hey I've got a good idea, I'll trying to control a huge lump of metal with my oversized thumb careening at 40 miles an hour while staring at the phone in my lap. I know I might run into the guy in front of me, a huge wall or a gas station, but I think if I'm really lucky I'll just hit some kid who's running across the street! By the way, if you actually do this, you are worse than the people that liked Hitler. And this brings me to my next subject.

People Who are too Stupid[edit]

Now, don't get me wrong here, everyone has the right to some amount of stupidity, but some people simply abuse the privilege. I mean, did you know 50% of the French don't remember the Second World War. FIFTY PERCENT! May God help us all. We fought and died for their sorry asses, and the only excuse they can give is "eet 'appened before I was born"? We won't be helping them against the Muslims, that's for sure.

The question is, does this image apply to the "Inaccurate Statistics" post or the one just above it?

Inaccurate Statistics[edit]

Apparently 4 out of 5 dentists recommend every brand of toothbrush, toothpaste, and floss that has ever been produced. I guess nowadays they're just happy if people use these products AT ALL. In Great Britain, the Dentist is looked upon as the bloodied-tooth version of Sweeney Todd. Thus, you're not likely to see British dentists recommending anything short of simply returning once a year, or decade.

Mimes[edit]

The real reason I hate mimes is because everyone else does and I don't want to feel left out. There MAY also be a French-hating element, yet I've no problem with Crepes, even though the word looks like it should be pronounced "craps".

I hate mimes because it takes so long for them to get their point across. I understand that it "adds to the show" or whatever but really, they should just say it! Another interesting thing about mimes is that whatever it is that they are trying to say is NEVER of any interest, or importance, and I mean never.

I hate that mimes get themselves trapped so easily and also that they find themselves in need of a very large rope so often. Jesus, you'd think they'd come prepared after all this time. For instance, with an invisible glass cutter. Whether the cutter is invisible or it cuts invisible glass is irrelevant.

People Who Give In to Peer Pressure[edit]

Why don't you people grow a pair and learn the word NO. And don't do that just because I told you to and now you feel like you have to do it. Oh and smoking has NOTHING to do with this. Why do kids smoke? Definitely not from peer pressure.

Flamers[edit]

Shut up already and go complain to someone who cares instead of insulting anyone you can find, you stupid trolling freaks.

Yea, Flamers are pretty gay.

No I DON'T want to change Mobile network providers!

I don't mind regular gays but the ones that act like women piss me off. Especially when they refer to each other as "she" and "her". Ah! Oh, and why do all butch lesbians look the same? Buzzed hair and plaid shorts is not a good look.

Santa[edit]

Fat Bastards Always Calling Me- He's Trying to switch me to vodaphone. Santa ate my cookies that fat ass always looking for my cookies. Broke my fireplace too, chubby prick. Oh, and why does everyone picture him white? No black Santa? Racists.

Emos[edit]

A stereotype for (usually) young teenagers who either: Cut themselves; listen to "screamo"; wear dark clothes; are shy to others; wear skinny jeans; have all black hair (some times their hair is in their faces eating their eyes); some act as if the world is about to end and that there is no hope; wear black nail polish.... and I think you get the point.

Flat Earthers and Scientologists[edit]

Seriously? You believe that crap? Both of their religions are just giant trolls, and I hate them for not noticing it yet.

Who Ever Started This Article[edit]

Every day I think about the things I could do with my hate; but, now that I have somewhere to vent, the hate isn't spreading through the rest of the population! I'll give you hate. i hate the song Rude Boy!!! She had a cute boy and he beat her up now she wants a Rude Boy

Double Posting[edit]

A waste of my freaking time. Nuff said.

Double Posting[edit]

A waste of my freaking time. Nuff said.

Triple Posting[edit]

A real waste of my motherf**king time!

Triple Posting[edit]

A real waste of my motherf**king time!

Triple Posting[edit]

A real waste of my motherf**king time!

The Pimp who made BoBoBo[edit]

He must have been the most piminest foo' on Earth.

People who made this article into crap[edit]

Seriously?!

PeOpLe WhO tYpE lIkE tHiS[edit]

gets on my nerves so much.

Also... Peeps hoo tawk lyk dis, aye cuz[edit]

Why even bother? It's longer than typing the correct spelling. Go back to primary school. You 12 year olds.

OR PEOPLE WHO TALK LIKE THIS[edit]

All Those Caps Are Fucking Unnecessary. Its a CAPS LOCK key, MAKE SURE ITS OFF!

A pebble in their shoe[edit]

What? You're gonna tell me it's possible that there is actually someone that doesn't hate it?

In fact, I think a good torture method would be to threaten to shoot them if they don't walk 2 miles with a pebble on each of their shoes. Now that would be painful.

Habbo Hotel[edit]

Anyone with the horrible misfortune to have ever overseen anyone spending time in said virtual hotel, will undoubtedly know the soul crushing sadness which invariably comes with it- if you're having trouble imagining it, just think of someone beating up a kitten. If that turns you on, however, go tell 4chan. They'd love to hear about it.

China[edit]

Who would not hate these communists? They make our stuff while we sit back and relax.

Haha, China is showing rudimentary free markets now. That means they're not communist anymore, they're fascist.

Oh, and the other day they forgot my fortune cookie in my order.

Guess what else China?

You fail.

People who bitch and complain in long lines[edit]

You don't think I have it bad too, having to spend 10 more minutes listening to this shit?


Today's Music[edit]



*

White people have taken over the industry and made music utter crap. The same thing that they made good in the first place. Only Eminem, the only white rapper, is good to listen to. Some people defend it. Rap is poetry. Rap is talent! It's not talent. It's AUTOTUNING!. And what ever happened to decent Rock music? Artists have grown so old and aren't even making music anymore. AC/DC is too busy attempting to make Iron Man 2 good to make great songs like they used to. Fuck the Black Ice album. Even Slash doesn't compare to the old greats like Jimmy Hendrix, Eric Clapton, and Jimmy Page. Today all the bands are fucked up. All these teenage vampire post-grunge Nirvana rip-off emo hair bands that sound like shit and don't compare to older bands, not even KISS.

People who Hate the Thing they Like[edit]

This is retarded, and I won't give it any more attention.

Moving on...

Singers with an excess number of fans between the age of 8 and 12[edit]

Especially when they sing songs that have been played on the radio more than 500 times last week. And no thanks to your younger sister, who has her wall covered with their posters, you have to listen to it the same number of times next week, too.

People who still try to pull off mullets[edit]

Every time I see a person with a mullet I just want to punch it out of them and then kindly ask them why they still have one. I mean haven't they heard yet that's they're just not cool anymore?

People who don't speak the Language[edit]

Amni wootsi um namasi. Ockma na upsala par impsinonsensico par umdanino. Nar anglisio espanicundo italinar esweidisho.

People Who Show Off that they Know Another Language[edit]

Its fine at home. But I see Mexican kids in public all the time who speak clear English but when they're with their cousin they'll act like its secret code or something and talk about you right in front of your back. And if you piss 'em off they'll shit some crazy-ass Spanish swears out of their mouths. Whats worse than Spanish is French. Le parles-tu who gives a fuck???

The Internet[edit]

90% of the internet is filled with nothing but pussies. Whether it be pussycats with pointless unfunny captions on them or actual uncensored pussies, they both pop out at you when you click a random flashing ad on your screen followed by some email identity scheme that you stupidly fall prey to.

That "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing[edit]

I guess one of them is supposed to be sarcastic or something, but seriously English needs to start making sense.

English Doesn't Make Sense[edit]

Why is "drought" spelled with a "gh" in it which is silent, but then "enough" has a "gh" that sounds like an "f". Also, why is it that "phonetically" isn't spelled phonetically? Our words are getting ridiculous.

Restaurants that don't allow substitutions[edit]

Who the hell are you to tell me that I can only have asparagus with my steak when I've said three times that I want mashed potatoes? There is literally no point to such a rule except for pissing of your customers.

Used Car Salesmen[edit]

Sure, he seems like a great guy, selling you a great deal. Just wait until next week when you realize he sold you a lemon and you try in vain to return it. There's a good reason he's trying to get rid of those vehicles.

Uncyclopedia[edit]

most of it is okay, but 40% is unfunny nonsensical bullshit.

Trying to Finish Lists[edit]

You're never really done because you just keep finding new things to put on there. For instance, this list will never be complete, and I guarantee someone will add something to it after I post this.


People who do all of the above[edit]

It's possible. And if there is a person who is like that, you should bloody well hate them, because he/she/it is a dickhead.

Your dad[edit]

As he fucks your mom, he seems to be some kinda competition. But eh, enough moms left ay?

See also[edit]