Things to call a Jew

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Over history many questions have been asked. Most of these questions were about God. But another popular question was "What should I call a Jew?" Well my simple minded, unknowing friend there are many things to call a Jew.

Jewish stuff
More Jewish stuff


Because Judaism is such a hilarious religion we need something to call the followers of it. First it was pioneered by That guy, a revolutionary Jew who was tired of being called a Jew and needed a new name to be called. He went from providence to providence of Rennisccance France looking for the perfect name until he was assasinated for "uprooting" the Jewish religion (and because he was mistaken for Prince). For a great many years nothing happened in this field of hilarity. Finally a young and maybe too eager Catholic got bored in school and started making fun of his Jewish friend just because he could. The results were great and now we have many, original, funny, and straight up insulting things to call Jews.

Regular things to call a Jew[edit]

You're a cute little Ninjew aren't you!
  • John the Jew (if said Jew in question is named John)
  • The Jewster
  • Jew (make sure you never call them by anything else if you use this)
  • Jew momma
  • JewbeJewbedoo
  • Jewbilee
  • Jewne
  • Jewly
  • Jewfro
  • Jewhead
  • Ninjew
  • Jewb

Things to call a big Jew[edit]

  • Jewbacca
  • Jewpiter
  • Jewhamas
  • Jewba
  • Jewmaica
  • Jewmerica
  • Jewpan
  • Jewbuktu

Things to call Jews that really like food[edit]

  • Jewce
  • Jew Jew Bean
  • Jew Jew Fruit
  • Jewfu

Things to call a Jew that likes sports[edit]

  • Jewke
  • Jewhamma Ahli

In conclusion[edit]

By now you know there are many things to call the local Jew. Although this lists a good amount of Jewish nicknames if you can think of it use it and if you're lucky you're on your way to some grade A Jew Gold.