Public transportation
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
- Did you mean: shite?
“Vehicles designed for public transportation are usually not labyrinths.”
“Public Transportation's for jerks and lesbians.”
~ Homer Simpson on Public Transportation
Public transportation makes it possible for people to travel without paying for their own car and gasoline and is therefore a crime against the DMCA and should, according to some experts, be considered Unamerican.
In some countries, mostly those in the third world that do not need to support oil companies and car manufacturers, public transportation is (unlike in USA) not given the role of giving the homeless a place to urinate. This is why the streets of France run yellow with pee.
It is important to realize that not all societies can accept a system where even the suburbs of large metropolitan areas are served by a network of bus traffic and subway systems. Quite the contrary; when such a system makes it possible for people to travel in a relatively cheap and efficient way, the economic implications are too terrible to consider (again, see France). To protect the economy, all civilized nations that have been forced by Communist infiltrators to implement public transportation systems ensure that the physical infrastructure of the transportation facilities is made painful to use, and reinforce the inconvenience with extensive mind control radiation and terrorism threats.
[edit] Mind Control and Public Transportation
The traditional means of placing advertisements in public areas was proven by Oscar Wilde to be not effective enough to make up to the economical loss of people not consuming any products while travelling. Only in the last decade or so telecommunication devices have slowly made it possible for people to consume while sitting on a subway train.
This consumption is usually consisting of the travellers making phone calls or browsing the Intarweb on their cell phones or listening to music or ebooks purchased from the iTunes music store on iPods. This change has been welcomed by environmentalists who previously have insisted that the consequences of having large percentages of the populations of major cities sitting in their own vehicles in traffic jams for hours with the engines running (thus consuming at least some gasoline) not being acceptable.
[edit] Recent legal battles
During the early 00s large American companies like General Motors and Ford have with some success lobbyed against laws making it legal for car owners living in communities offering public transportation to do some travelling with vehicles not owned by themselves.
Legalisation of driving free days is still a controversial political issue in parts of the western world, due to the common fear of that some people might forget how to drive safely if not praticing to improve their driving skills every day. This particular belief have however been discovered to be an urban legend started by corrupt journalists.
[edit] Public Transportation in Use
- New York City, New York
- Djibouti (the city), Djibouti (the country)
- London, England
- Stockholm, Sweden
- Heck
- French Polynesia
- Psychedelic cab
- Take The Car (Toronto)
