UnBooks:A UTP: Dating Adverts From Hyrule
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HOT LOCAL SINGLES ARE WAITING FOR YOUR CALL!
CHECK THEM OUT IN: Hyrule and Area
SINGLE NUMBER ONE
MORSHU
Location: Koridai
Occupation: Shopkeeper
Morshu: Boil, rope, bombs, you want it? You want it? You want it? You want my cum? I want your tits. You're my friend, as long as you have boobies.
1-800-DODONGO
SINGLE NUMBER TWO
USHROM
Location: Gamelon
Occupation: Shopkeeper
Ushron: Sorry, I have diarrh(o)ea. You'll have to wipe off my stuff. Just pick what you want. I'll handle your boobies.
1-800-BOOBIES
SINGLE NUMBER THREE
JOHN BAKER
Location: Gamelon
Occupation: Baker
John Baker: You're my friend, come see my cock! It's awful! Hurry! Suck my cock, if your friend could lick my asscake? Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! My cum will burn!
1-800-ASS-CAKE
SINGLE NUMBER FOUR
GWONAM
Location: Koridai
Occupation: Wizard
Gwonam: Cum here, see my beautiful face. It is written: "I'm beautiful". You must come to my house and go to bed with me. It is written: "You must have beautiful tits"
1-800-SQUADALLAH!
SINGLE NUMBER FIVE
IMPA
Location: Hyrule
Occupation: Old Racist Lesbian
Impa: I don't like darkies! Only white ladies can piss on my face. Yes, yes, yes, old lady piss.-
1-800-NO-DARKIES
SINGLE NUMBER SIX
ZELDA
Location: Hyrule
Occupation: Princess
Zelda: I'm easy. Come on, let's go fuck! I'll show you how. First, I'll flash you my tits. Then to enter me, move in front of my foot. Luckily, my magic pouch can carry as much as you want. To open my pouch, make me crouch down. Use your tool. Move it up to make me come up and over makes it shoot.
1-800-BUTTFATHER
SINGLE NUMBER SEVEN
FARI
Location: Gamelon
Occupation: Retainer
Hey! Hey! Hey! Gay! Here's my Majesty King! Want to talk about my chamber? Betray my place? Here's the porn!
1-800-OH-DADDY!
SINGLE NUMBER EIGHT
LINK
Location: Hyrule
Occupation: Boi
Check it out! I'm easy! Hey! Wanna see my dong? It won't hurt anyone friendly. In fact, it makes them do the thugwalk. Hey! Let's go fuck! Just lick my butt and flash! I'm gay!
1-800-MY-STUFF
SINGLE NUMBER NINE
????
Location: ?
Occupation: ?
I gotta make love to strangers. I'm thinking of feeling you up. Never gonna say lie down and hurt. You're thinking of-
1-800-RICK-ROLL
| Games: |
The Legend of Zelda - Blink-182 is Passé - Link's Arousal - Ocarina of Time - Majora's Mask - The Wind Waker - The Midget's Cap - Twilight Princess - Phantom Hourglass - The Wand of Gamelon |
| Characters: | Link - Ganondorf - King Harkinian - Tingle - Vaati - That Old Man from The Legend Of Zelda - Impa |
| Somethings: | Hyrule - Link is a Tree - The Legend of Zelda Link theory - Rupees - UnBooks:A UTP: Link Gets Pregnant and Dies - UnBooks:A UTP: Dating Adverts From Hyrule |
