UnNews:'Enchanted Sword may solve' missing Madeleine Case
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12 September 2007
THE PUBLIC PROSECUTOR in the Madeleine McCann case is asking for emergency powers to seize an "ancient and mysterious object", Unnews can reveal. The object is thought to be an enchanted sword which was hidden by elves after a victorious battle against the evil Devil Lord "Zelbleborth" and his evil minions. It is thought the sword was owned and used by the Devil Lord himself!
It is not currently known where the sword is but the prosecutor is appealing for any "brave champions of valour" to embark on a perilous and foolhardy quest to find it. It is thought that the artifact may reside "beyond the vast orc infested Forests of Darkdoom and therein deep within the haunted Mountains of the Lost Rumplestiltskins."
Under Portuguese law, a judge's permission would only be needed if the object is "enchanted by dark magicks and infused with ancient and UNSTOPPABLE evil". How it would solve the case of a missing girl has not been divulged but it is hypothesized that any wielder of the blade may "see into the darkest of hearts and reveal the basest of truths."
Police spokesman Chief Inspector Olegario Sousa refused to confirm or deny the reports but was seen huddled around a smoking cauldron with other detectives, cackling wildly.
[edit] Sources
- THE ENCHANTED SWORD OF MICKLEWORTH! "BEHOLD FAIR MORTALS!". WITH THIS ALL ANSWERS WILL BE ASKED!, September 10, 2007
