UnNews:McLeish Keen On England Position

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22 November 2007

McLeish keen on England position

Scotland manager Alex Mcleish is thought to be the FA’s prime target following the departure of Steve McLaren.

After England’s humiliating and rather entertaining failure to reach the Euro 2008 Championships, the FA have quickly set out to replace Steve McLaren after his not so controversial sacking earlier this morning.

Initial favourites to take over the England hot seat are thought to be Jose Mourinho and Luiz Felipe Scolari, although the FA revealed in this morning’s press conference that they feel a British manager would be best for the job. FA chairman Geoff Thompson said: "Like every England fan, we are all bitterly disappointed that our team is officially shit, and I know Steve feels that disappointment more than anyone. However, we look north of the border at Scotland just now and say to ourselves, now wait a minute, that bloke, erm… Ally McLeish seems pretty good, how about him?”

On being asked whether a Scotman would accept the England job, Thompson replied “The bloke used to manage Rangers for Pete’s sake. Go and watch Rangers this weekend and you’ll see more England strips and Union Jacks at Ibrox than you did at Wembley last night. He’s perfect!” “McLeish has taken Scotland to the brink of qualification in arguably the toughest group of the lot with only a dodgy Spanish referee and some Georgian refugees stopping them get there. England on the other hand couldn’t beat Lapland with a depleted squad around Christmas time just now.”

According to BBC Radio Scotland, Alex McLeish has said it would be an honour for him to manage England. The former Rangers boss has constantly been linked to leaving his post as Scotland boss for a big move Down South over the last week and the Tartan Army are getting worried again after last night’s party, courtesy of Croatia. One Scotland supporter said: “We lost Walter Smith before big Alex to Rangers who are pretty much supported by England fans so why would Big Eck becoming England manager be any different?”

Steven Gerrard on hearing confirmation of McLaren's sacking this morning.

McLeish said: “England is a big, big country with a support second to none, with only the Tartan Army better. It would be an honour for me to be manager, like it would be for all other managers. Every time I visited England as a coach I was struck by the passion of the fans and was made to feel welcome and at home by all the nice people” (Dennis Law). “They have a beautiful stadium and the possibility of a new FA board and of course I would talk to them if they indicate they are interested in me becoming coach. England are an established side in world football (or soccer for the benefit of David Beckham) with great potential and I know they have ambitions to challenge higher up the FIFA World Rankings. If the English are higher in the rankings than Burkina Faso in five years time then I’d see that as a successful campaign.”

British Prime Minister Gordon Brown claims he’d be happy to see England do well but not at the expense of a good Scottish national side. “What Alex has done for us is phenomenal, but I fear war would break out between Scotland and England is he was to become like his predescesor Big Walter. I know the other national leader, Alex Salmond would also be against it, but what’s new there?”

Meanwhile, on the dole Steve McLaren is thought to have sent an application to Perth based, Scottish Division One outit St Johnstone who's current manager Owen Coyle is set to become the new Burnley manager within the next week.