Uncle Phil

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Philip Banks,also known as uncle phil by his nephew will was (born in South Carolina on September 21, 1945) is an American lawyer best known for as will's evil uncle in the groundbreaking US TV sitcom The Fresh Prince of Bel End.

He is a pawn of satan for total domination of earth.


Contents

[edit] Early Life and Childhood

Uncle Phil was born Philip Banks and raised on a farm in north carolina.He was your average african american hillbilly.His parents were Hattie and Joe Banks.Because of his life on the farm ,Philip learned the value of hardwork which would help him in his adulthood.Throughout his childhood,started at 3 years old, his parents would make him work in the farm, feeding chickens and plowing fields 23 hours a day.He was a normal boy.However, he was sexually confused as a teenager.He had a sexual obsession with cows.He regulary sucked utters and put his dick into cows asses.His parents were concerned about this strange fetish and the family moved to baltimore when Philip was 16 .

[edit] Civil Rights movements and career

In the 1960s, he became an activist for the civil rights movement.He was present at the Watts Riots and he also knew malcolm x .He met him when he became part of the nation of Islam created by Knuckles the Echidina whos popular in Sonic the Hedghog .He liked islam because he got all the Hummus he could eat.He would eat 20 pounds of it a day.However,he quit the organization when knuckles started lynching white people. In 1963, he was awarded a scholarship to study at Princtin University after which he went to Harvard Law school to become a corrupt lawyer.He particpated in the Watergate scandel. In 1975, Philip was put on the board of the NAACP and was later awarded the Urban Spirit Award for his work in promoting civil rights.Knuckles also awarded him a medal and Rouge the Bat as his sex toy for being part of the Muslim movement he started. Around the 1990s Phil worked with Firth, Wynn and Meyer,a law firm. He became a judge when he had Dr. Robotnik kill Judge Carl Robertson,the present lawyer.Philip had to have but sex with robotnik 60 times to pay him because he was horney.Robotnik successfully killed carl without anybody knowing.The news media said that he died suddenly.Philip was an hourly paid lawyer and judge.and regulary participated in pro-bono work.However he sometimes uses abuse of litigation in various ways, including using dilatory tactics and false evidence and making frivolous arguments to the courts.In cases involving a white man and a black man, he will usually side with a black guy, even if the white guy has a substantial amount of evidence for his claim and the other guy dosent.

[edit] Personal Life

Philip Banks buried himself in his work.He had little time for romantic relationships.It wasnt until the 1970s when he was in his 30s that he sought out true love.He eventually found Vivian Banks.They met on soul train and proposed on there.He had 3 children with her,hilary, ashley and a gay boy,carlton.Around 1990,he adopted his newphew will smith to groom him in becoming king of bel-air.Thats why will smith is called the fresh prince of bel-air.he didnt want to groom his own son carlton because he hated gays.here is a short summary on his children. Carlton is not gay, in real life. Non in the show either. He acts thought.

Will-Will is Uncle Phil's sarcastic and crazy nephew.Will moved in with the bank's family when he was 17 because a bully named omar back in philly raped him on the basketball court.His mom didnt want will to be gay so he moved him with the banks in bel-air. He loves to make fun of Uncle Phil's obesity.Phil is sensitve about his weight so he kills will with a kitchen knife regulary because of this.However,will is a super powerful titanium robot more powerful than the terminator so its impossible to kill him.Eventually, phil stopped trying to kill him and embraced him as a son despite his constant fat jokes.He saw talent in him and groomed him in becoming the king of bel-air.They became close and will became a part of the banks family

,uncle phil's transvestike son .Carlton Banks.

Carlton-Uncle Phil's openly gay son who wears a pink tutu.Carlton is a preppy . While highly intelligent, he is commonly annoying and arrogant. Carlton aspires to attend a really preppy college.He aims to get into Yale University but later fixes a determined focus on Princton. Carlton often dances alot in his tutu.He does a stupid dance called a" carlton dance" which is just a improvised dance routine to Tom Jones' "It's Not Unusual."Uncle Phil loves his son but dosnet like he his homosexual.He frequently breaks strippers over to the banks household but carlton just asks them do they have any boyfriends.Carlton is also a midget.He is constantly made fun of by his cousin will.However,he just ignores will because he thinks hes an idiot

Hilary is Phil's attractive, but dull-witted, eldest kid, known for her notable lack of intelligence, being spoiled, and her dependence on Geoffrey.She dosent even know how to do laundry.She just gets Geoffrey to do it.uncule phil is extra nice to her, gives her a huge allowance and buying her lots of jewelry.He frequenly touches her breasts.However,Hilary is too stupid to realize that Uncle Phil is a sexual freak.Hilary's snobbishness is emphasized.She dosnet care about school,politics or career matters.She just cares about trendy clothing and flashy jewelry and shopping and money. However, despite her shallow personality, she has a strong sense of integrity and shows obvious affection to her family members. Will gets along with her better than with Carlton.He cant think of any jokes about her because she is beatiful without any physical flaws like carlton. Hilary is portrayed as a valley girl and speaks with some strong valspeak habits.This is because she is not really black.She is a illegitamate daughter uncle phil had when he was in college with a white woman.

Ashley Banks-she is the youngest banks family member.She hangs out with will mostly becasue he comes from the ghetto and she wants to be a gangsta like him.She thinks her dad , Uncle Phil is overprotective and rebels against him often.Later on she becomes a teenage slut and sleeps with 10 different men each night.Uncle Phil blames will for this.However, she had a brief singing career and went to fashion school.

Uncle Phil can be a very gruff and serious man,but somethimes he can be cool.He likes to dance to james brown music and loves food like The King of Hyrule.He loves his dinner.But his love of food causes him problems.He would starve his own family while he gorged regualry.However,Will dosent need food because he is a robot.He also would have 10 heart attacks every 5 seconds.His wife vivian recomended he get surgery.He got lyposuction but after 2 seconds he became fat again by eating 20 pounds of butter.Philip is a very caring and loving husband and father. He makes sure that he does what is best for all his children, including Will. Although Will is only related to Philip by marriage,cares for him alot.This is probably because he is not gay like his own son carlton and is a playa and has lots of girlfriends.Throughout the series, Philip has been there for his children in their time of need. If anything, he will go out of his way to make sure his children make something of themselves.Althought uncle phil is a loving family man, he abuses his butler Geoffry.He pays him a meager wage and dosent allow him to eat real food with the family.He feeds him only sponges.He gives his butler a wage somethimes but its usually 1 penny.Geoffrey only stays because he wants to hear will make fun of carlton's height.

[edit] Life as a supervillian

Uncle Phil got , fed up with being a lawyer after awhile decided to practice justice more directly.After seeing a bank robbery, he farted on a robber and stopped him.However,he didnt want to be seen as a goody two shoes.He decided to become evil.Soon,he dressed up like aquaman,aquired expensive military weapons and hired a sidekick called Tails the fox.None of the banks family members wanted to partipate in his life of crime.They all thought he went insane.He created an evil organization called banks enterprises and hired various supervillians to participate in evil crimes.One of these was the joker.Joker was hesitant to join at first but phil offered him a huge paycheck.Eventually, he conquered Iraq and destroyed most of the nation.Afer taking over Iraq,he decided to become normal uncle phil again.He left all his weapons in iraq and let joker run his evil organization.

[edit] See also

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