March 3: International Beat Random People With a Metal Pipe Day
- 4328 BC - Goa Tse born.
- 1944 - It was Mr Green, in the Lounge, with the Lead Pipe.
- 1970 - Tonya Harding is born.
- 1987 - Well, now that I've finally done it, I might as well post it on the internet.
- 1999 - Hey, this link doesn't look too bad. Let's see where it... OH MY GOD!
- 2000 - One year free of that horrid image. Hey, my friend told me to go to a site. This couldn't possibly be bad... JESUS CHRIST! COME ON!
- 2001 - Another link, I'm not falling for that one. But www.kittens.com, how could it be... WHY GOD WHY?!
- 2002 - No more links. I swear - but hey, a movie file... GOOD LORD! THEY ANIMATED IT!
- 2003 - It has been one year since I've gone blind, so I can now safely click on links to view webpages... "Listen to this article"?... OH COME ON! THAT IS DISTURBING.
- 2004 - Now that I've gone deaf, all is well. Oh what is this, an image to braille converter? Hmm, I'll take a random image off my hard drive, convert... now lets see what it feels like... Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrgghh!
- 20X6 - Some future archeologist will uncover a server. Once getting it to work and viewing the lone image on it, he shall be forever disgusted believing our society a fan of people doing such things. He may also find the fossilized remains of Wikipedia after Oscar Wilde has eaten its brain.
- 2007 Serial pest who goes by the name of "Tonigol" is arrested in Sydney for "Masturbating furiously" at the Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras.