Unix
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Unix is a recursive acronym for Unix is sexy and has been a part of our daily lives for many years. As you can see from the picture to the right, she's kind of hot. If I were like 50 years older or if I could travel through time, I'd definitely boink her. She's probably a screamer too. Bonus!
[edit] Important Unix Disclaimer
Unix is an operating system for purists based on neutering the pixies, making them gender-less eunuchs (or pixels). After they have been neutered, they are promptly cooked, and packed in freezer bags to be distributed among supermarkets worldwide, and to be used as seasoning to go with fine cheese. Because of this, it is vitally important to check the internal temperature before eating.
[edit] Fun Unix Facts
Unix runs on a massive array of entities, including fridges, badgers, pedometers, Latin dictionaries, wardrobes, flamingos and even computers. It has recently been ported to doors. There is no running version for windows yet, though people did manage to get an alpha version running on gates.
Please note: practicing safe unix is always prudent when running with 'flaming-OS'. This entity is known for changing its appearance to look act and sound like 'flamingos'. Product is easily identified by it's hot pink packaging, gay happy face emoticons, and banner advertisement for the YMCA sung by the Village People. Windows is not supported, butt a backdoor version is quite popular.
The rights to the word 'Unix' have changed hands more times than you can shake a stick at, reputedly starting with Alexander the Great. It is estimated that by 2056, 50% of the Earth's population will have claimed ownership to the word Unix at some point or other, and 80% will have been sued for it.
It is reported that Unix tastes better while using a toilet.
As opposed to OS-oids, Unix is a Real Operating System (TM), which means that it is not the product of a marketing company.
Unix is a clone of Linux, which is a clone of Windows, which are in the house that Jack built.
Unix is first ever virus with command line interface.
