User:Axalon

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“This is me. Start Spreading the news.”

~ Khazar on Axalon

This user is American ...and unabashedly proud of it! (List of American Uncyclopedians) This user is a Registered User and they can upload images and move pages, whoopdie freakin doo. ♂ This user is a boy and is made of slugs, snails and puppy dog tails. en-N This user is a native speaker of English. [[Español es-2]] This user is able to contribute with an intermediate level of Español . ns-1 This user is able to contribute with a basic level of Newspeak. ja-X This user only speaks Japanese enough to seduce native Japanese speakers. This user believes the Mozilla Firefox could easily defeat Godzilla.

Contents 1 Biography 1.1 Childhood 1.2 Adolescenthood 1.3 Adulthood 1.4 Cadaverhood

[edit] Biography

[edit] Childhood

Axalon was raised by a group of giant enemy crabs. He enjoyed such pastimes as reading, watching the television device, and the intarweb. His foster group taught him the lost art of real-time weapon change. When he reached the age of 13, he completed the rite of passage of flipping them over and attacking their weak point for MASSIVE DAMAGE.

[edit] Adolescenthood

Axalon's adolescent years were a creamy blend of fansubbed anime, teenage angst, and Linux. After defeating his giant crab foster family, he went to Sony Computer Entertainment HQ and became a ridge racer! RIIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDGEEEEEEE RACERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! Uh, I'm running out of ideas here. After waking up from a coma after getting into a horrendous accident that actually took place in Ancient Japan, he set off to fight the forces of Evil™.

[edit] Adulthood

After promptly getting bored of that, he decided the forces of Evil™ weren't worth it and is currently going to accidentally the music world with musical stylings that RAWK YUOR SAWKZ.

[edit] Cadaverhood

Whoa! Time paradox! Axalon is still alive! One could say that this is a triumph. Funny how that works.