This userpage is ugly because fuck you
||This user is on vacation, sabbatical, administrative leave, or is otherwise goofing off with the knowledge and/or consent of the Admins. Or, more likely, they've buggered off without saying boo to anyone. Their expected date of return is when I finish my damn work, probably June 17th or June 18th. This last week of school is crucial for me and I can't be distracted. I'll still be slightly active, but not very much. If you're lonely, or you miss them, leave a message.
| Nominated Reviewer of the Month|This user has been nominated for Reviewer of the Month—you can vote for them or nominate any helpful reviewers at Reviewer of the Month.
For those who have been asking me to get a FaceBook, I had one, but deactivated it due to harassment. Please don't ask me to put out any personal information publicly, there or anywhere else, because of this harassment. Thank you. Also, Wikia sucks. It won't let me log in and nothing loads properly. FU hamsters on caffeine.
Sockpuppeteer of the Month April 2010
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| User Nominated for Ban|This user has been nominated for banning —you can vote for them to be banned or nominate your least-favourite users at FFS.
- EMERGENCY MESSAGE TO ADMINS: BAN HELPME NOW OR THE WORLD WILL IMPLODE!!!!
- Look at his awards and stuff and be
happy you have more awards than he does amazed.
- Oh, and his PEE Reviews.
About me? Well, other than what my userboxes and subpages say, there isn't much. I'm a 16 year old in Washington D.C with no life. I've been frequenting the internet since about September of 2008. Uncyclopedia is my first and only Wiki, though I've been around many forums. (that explains why I hang around talk pages so much, and know nothing about this "privacy" bollocks.) I was born in England and lived there for about 4 or 5 years, so if I use both American and English terms, don't worry about it. I spend most of my time reverting vandals, cyberbullies, and unfunny people. I also list pages on QVFD, vote on VFD and various other pages, and do the occasional pee review. Basically, I'm helpful in a different way than article writers, but I don't think of myself as useless. If people like myself weren't around, about 80% of our old pages would be "suck mah dick" and about 99% of our new pages would be "ur gay." I'm also a grammar and spelling Nazi, and I can't stand the way people in D.C speak. If I correct your spelling and grammar, it's not because I'm a pain of the ass, it's because you need to learn English. Also, if my edit summary when I corrected your grammar was pompous and snooty, please don't cry. I do it out of love.
Frequently asked HELPME-themed question
Does HELPME have far too many userboxes?
Penis.--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN Candidate NOTM USS Pees Stain ) On Sunday, 06:40, May 16 2010 UTC
- Vagina. —Pelozurian (talk) 05:28, 6 June 2010 (UTC)
- Die.--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN Candidate NOTM USS Pees Stain ) On Sunday, 05:30, June 06 2010 UTC
- No. —Pelozurian (talk) 06:20, 6 June 2010 (UTC)