The duck was created after some guy at a GG Allin concert fucked a platypus while covered in pigeon blood. The Platypus gave birth to the first baby duckling 6 weeks later and after an initial scare that it might actually be a swan, the new creature was gladyly accepted into society. People loved it immedietley because it sounded like fuck and the game Goose suddenly became a lot more interesting, and to this day ducks continue to be great candidates for bath toys and stale bread disposers.
Daffy Duck - old friend and alleged lover of Bugs Bunny, famous for various public indecency arrests stemming from his refusal to wear any clothing of any sort. Currently serving two years of house arrest.
Peking Duck - Chinese spy, believed to have infiltrated every neighborhood in the United States
Donald Duck - Wealthy entrepenur, believed to be the only Jewish duck in existence
Controversy Involving Ducks
- Ducks are known for running up extremely high tabs at bars and taverns all around the world, in Russia, Australia, and Sweden a Police Task force has been assigned with the specific responsibility of hunting down these ducks and bringing them before a judge.
- A teacher in Columbia, South Carolina was recently charged with screaming "Fuck!" in a classroom, during her trial she claimed she had been pointing out a duck just outside the classroom window and that she had actually yelled the word "Duck!". In a News Conference Reverend Al Sharpton spoke on behalf of the USDA (United States Duck Association) calling for the teacher to be "ducking fired"