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“He's pretty much just... CHINA!”

~ Oscar Wilde on Lumpolard.

“He is definently champion of the day.”

~ Nathan Dawson on Lumpolard.

“Not the best sex i've had, but i'd do it again ;).”

~ Nathan Dawson on Sex with Lumpolard.

Architectural Feats[edit]

After recently graduating elementary school at age 34 i was accepted into the RED COMMUNIST CHINA school of design, where corners are never cut due to COMMUNISM. I designed roads for CHINA and have recently been awarded MASTER TRAFFIC EXTERMINATOR... YES!

My crowning accomplishment!

Not only this but i was also the cheif architect on the "PISA Project" during which i created a masterful and, intentionaly leaning, tower that is now know through out the world to be the work of an absolute GENIUS!!!

Recent adventures[edit]

I am currently visiting china trying to scout out the hottest new cankles, for disply and my free CRACK party. I also was the financial advisor for Enron and also for Nortel,

MMM... Delicious like home made cookies!

to to mention the fact that i recently piloted the EXXON valdez II into an oceanic wildlife reserve slowly killing the entire population. I also have been working on my new movies "Two Girls One Cup Two" and "Cloverfeild II" as you can tell from these titles i am alredy established as a master filmographer.


I Pretty much followed russia in to the deep hole of Communism, due to the fact that lithium selenide is "The Congo's" source of unlimited joy and cashews. In my early days I also stumbled upon the the crumpet in labratory while trying to invent what is now known as the "Hamburger". I am very proud that my crumpet led a revolution in brittan and governed for years with the metric system as well beating dinner in the struggle for afternoon meal supremacy. Also on my list of accomplishments is the fact that I pioneered the the use of the automobile in the production of celery! many people see these accomplishments as trivial but I for one know that they are what has lead to George W. Bushes Great war of terror.