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"I think that God in creating Man somewhat overestimated his ability."

~ Oscar Wilde
Member of the Order
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...and unabashedly proud of it!
(List of American Uncyclopedians)
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  1. REDIRECT Template:User explode
Autism11.png This user is an aspie and thus a member of The Master Race; bow before his/her intellectual might, puny Neurotypicals! (or alternatively punch the user in the face and take his or her lunch money)

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ow-2 This user has all of Oscar Wilde's books under his/her bed and really wants to read them.
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As such, they are not entitled to any of the royalties that being Thinkerer entails, nor do they claim a level of awesomeness equal to, or any higher than, Thinkerer.

\m/ This user is a metalhead, prone to wearing offensive shirts and headbanging to really loud music. Metalheads also have long hair, but are not to be confused with hippies.
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688 This user has contributed 688 pints points to the Uncyclopedia [email protected] Team.


en-N This user is a native speaker of English.
rh-N This user is a native speaker of Random Humour.
Pie-N This user is a native speaker of Pie.
MW-3 This user is able to contribute with an advanced level of MediaWiki.
de-3 This user is able to contribute with an advanced level of Deutsch.
uk-2 This user is able to contribute with an intermediate level of Correct English.
re-2 This user is able to contribute with an intermediate level of Recondite English.
ns-1 This user is able to contribute with a basic level of Newspeak.

About Me[edit]

I am OpenFaceSurgery aka Alex (1987-I ain't dead yet motherfuckers). Welcome to my little corner of the nuthouse. I am, as the bottom of this page states, officially Bat Fuck Insane. As well as being an utter loon, I am also from a small state called Rhode Island, and if you ask me to say "park the car" I will inflict grievous pain upon your physical being.

Frequently Unasked Questions (FUQ)[edit]

Does OpenFaceSurgery have any pets?[edit]

Yes No.

Is OFS insane?[edit]


What are OFS's favorite movies?[edit]

The Mat The Most Wrong and Irreverent OFS does not watch movies, he is movies.

What does OFS know about the cabal?[edit]

The cabal is There is no cabal. There is still no cabal to not talk about not existing.

Is OFS a potato?[edit]


Is OFS a grue?[edit]

Closer, but still no.


My first real contribution to Uncyclopedia was the addition of two sections to the Evil article, "Effects of Evil" and "Notable Evil People", both of which I tweaked continuously for the next couple hours until I thought they were funny enough. I later cleaned up the Cannibal Corpse page and added a few things to make it funnier. Everything I do here, pretty much, is done for lols. If it's not funny, it ought to be zapped into oblivion. Or, you know, just edited to make it funny.

I have also contributed a few things to Maggie Thatcher's page, the Engrish page, and the Coach Z page. Mostly touch-ups or additions of little jokes. Minor corrections won't be listed, but if I've contributed anything of significance to an article, I'll link to it on the Contributions page.

Happy Chairman Award[edit]

The Happy Chairman Award has been up for quite some time and was well-received. I'm hoping it will become an award.


Stuff I'm working on will be found in my Sandbox. My completed articles and whatnot are here, and my awards are here. Click here to yell at me.


CHUFF! Now that I have your attention, send me pie.