User:Pentium5dot1/Storage facility/Internet Explorer (censored)
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This article is best viewed on Mozilla Firefox.
You may be looking for shit and not even know it.
“Wow, it sucks. I'm going to use Firefox!.”
“YOUR BROWSER A SPLODE!”
“Man that ride information super-highway with IE 7 on computer going to crash.”
“In Soviet Russia, internet explores YOU!!”
Internet Explorer is a spyware and adware deployment tool developed by Microsoft, that can be used to visit warez and pr0n sites and download spyware and adware, which are microorganisms which live in symbiosis with it. Internet Explorer is not to be confused with Netscape or Firefox or Ninjas that were all popular forms of pr0n viewing before the third coming of the Flying Spagetti Monster which wiped out all companies in the world to be replaced with roving bands of pirates. True to their nature the Pirates set about sailing the 8 seas (the 8th having being placed in the middle of India after World War VI), plundering the software of the world. This led to a shortage of browser software causing a major backlog in and subsequent overflow of pr0n worldwide, the ramifications of which we still feel today. The infamous Pirate Paula_Abdul saved us from this by creating a piece of software called Internet Explorer which siphoned off the excess pr0n into 3rd world countries (Latvia, Canada, Disney Land) Everyone hates pr0n but this stupid so called "Internet exploding thing that whoops your ass off" keeps on spreading it.
Power of Internet Explorer
Internet Explorer is one (1) of the most powerful browsers for the Internet. One of the most frequent targets of criticism of the browser is this power: it takes longer to load pages and lay them out, due to the unmatched excellence of its Trident rendering engine. This compares to Mao Tsilla and Firefox's Gecko rendering engine, which randomly scatters elements, boxes and images across the page, then punches the user. As an homage to its roots in Spyglass, IE also supports instant installation of [[spyware]] without any user intervention, whereas Firefox makes it an unnecessarily complicated process, requiring clicking at least one "OK" box.
Windows™ Internet Explorer 7
In truth however, like all Internet browsers, it is based upon the 1600s Medieval French computer program, Exploreur du Faux. Exploreur du Faux was originally designed solely for downloading porn and product activation hacks.
Copyright violations and piracy allegations
The Mozilla Foundation and the Digital Rights Management Group filed a joint lawsuit against Microsoft, alleging that it copied Mozilla Firefox and, after adding code that automatically crashes Windows Explorer after an hour of use and requires that Web pages take longer than five seconds to load, rebranded it Windows Explorer. Security loopholes were also installed at the request of www.doubleclick.net. A month after the filing, Microsoft moved its headquarters to Thailand where violating copyright laws is legal.
Predating the Internet itself, Microsoft Internet Explorer is a profoundly interesting open-source Web browser developed by Bob. Unlike other browsers such as Opera and Mozilla Firefox, Internet Explorer focuses on being secure, modern, and standards-compliant. Microsoft Internet Explorer, or later in this article, Internet Explorer, should not be confused with Firefox Internet Explorer, a closed source browser created by the Firefox Communications Corporation.
Furthermore, Internet Explorer was written entirely in BASIC, and follows the primary rule of BASIC design. If a programming language or program cannot be fast, useful, efficient, or stable, at least it should be smelly. As noted in the screen-shot, Internet Explorer gives even the Japanese a run for their money. While Internet Explorer's designers claim that the program follows the Prime Directive, skeptics say that history has been altered numerous times by this megalithic, all-encompassing software.
Internet Explorer was the first Web browser to implement such features as tabbed browsing, pop-up blocking, and free complimentary spyware. It is extremely stable and is entirely bug-less. Using advanced predictive fractal algorithms it can predict the winning lottery numbers, making it the most useful browser on the planet. It can also tell the time, and feed pureéd broccoli to your unborn children. If you have no unborn children, Internet Explorer will impregnate you.
IE is known around the world as the most 1337 browser on the planet. Having absolutely no holes in its programming, the internet is chock full of Clinjas willing to help Bob make the browser even more 1337. But no one is fool enough to use it.
Many consider the ActiveX component of the browser to be the finest piece of software ever written. It is rumoured the ActiveX code was written by Jesus himself as it works so damn well. ActiveX, which is believed to be a typo of ActiveSEX, is a fantastic tool that, when activated, increases your ability to view porn by up to 1000%. It is said if you leave ActiveX on for just 10 minutes, you'll have whored half the Internet's bandwidth and will end up with enough porn to last you an eternity.
Firefox's closed-source nature lends to excessive amounts of exploits and security holes being discovered and utilised, contrary to the open-source Internet Explorer.
And Opera just sucks in comparison to Internet Explorer.
The second most popular browser is Saddam Hussein's Spyglass Mosaic, used by approximately 33% of the world's Internet users and capuchin monkeys.
- Browser Wars
- Poopenheimer Mainframe Mk XII Computer
- Mozilla Firefox
- Internet Exploiter
|V • T • E The cornerstones of the Internets|
|Internet | Internets | World Wide Web|
|Browsers||Internet Explorer | Safari | Konqueror | Maozilla | Mozilla Firefox | Google Chrome|
|Formats||Image file formats (LIM PNG SVG) | HTML | SGML|
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[[Category:Software]][[Category:Internet]][[category:Explorers]][[category:Internet Browsers]][[ Category:Errors]] (nowiki tags intentional)