User talk:Striker2117

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The entire cast of Full House: Season 1 wishes you luck during your time here.

Hey there Striker2117, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thanks for your contributions. I hope you like it here. If not, I'm sure life will go on elsewhere. Anyway, here are a few good links for people like you:

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Gore Theory[edit]

I diddled your pee review. Also, thanks for voting on my Keanu Reeves article. You have no idea how much your vote is valued! --Matfen 15:07, February 13, 2010 (UTC)


ChristianBaleAward.jpg Matfen
thanks you
for your vote!

His article could not have been featured without you...

--Matfen 11:38, February 21, 2010 (UTC)
--You're welcome. Awesome article. --Striker2117 18:53, February 21, 2010 (UTC)


Zowie Colonizer! Our next colonization is announced: BATMAN. As you're one of the few brave enough to take on Batman himself, meaning you volunteered to help do it, you're receiving this special dark knight notice. We are now planning to put together what may well become the greatest superhero of all time! Or maybe a kid who hands players bats. Or maybe.... Get your mind stimulated, flap those fleshy, featherless wings and fly out of the batcave and get to colonizing! (Or if you don't care about this overly-dramatic four-color dialog, just go to Uncyclopedia_talk:Imperial_Colonization/project and post your ideas.) Over and out. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  06:13, February 28, 2010 (UTC)

Imperial Colonization: Creationism and Batman[edit]

IMPORTANT: If you want to make comments on any part of this message, please post your comments on my talk page. I've sent this notice out to about 40 people, and will likely never see your response if you put it on your talk page. But if you insist on doing it anyway (sigh), please at least start a new section using == Your comments == below my signature and make comments there. This message is set up as a template, so if you try to make edits in this message, it will edit it everywhere, and get me nasty notes from admins.

The seventh day of Creationism[edit]

If you haven't heard the rumour, it's true. The new and improved and absolutely perfect version of Creationism has been created. And because it was so perfect, we got it Pee Reviewed so it could be even more perfect. Post-review edits are being done, and will be completed very soon so our colonized version can replace the current Creationism.

I gave credit on The Big Board to every colonizer who worked on the article (if I somehow missed you, put a note on my talk page). I really appreciate everyone's help; I think we have a great article. If this gets featured, however, I feel that only those who made the more substantial contributions should get co-feature credit. Otherwise, someone could add two words and get 1/2 credit for writing a feature article, which doesn't seem fair. (But note that half a dozen people or more could each get 1/2 credit; that's one of the advantages of being a colonizer as aren't limited by the laws of mathematics). Any opinions on this or anything in this notice are welcome on the IC talk page. Buccaneers traditionally work by group consensus, and I'm all for sharing the blame tradition.

I'm Batman[edit]

Our current colonization is Batman. Writing on it begins now. By consensus built over the past few days, this will feature a psychiatrist talking with Bruce Wayne, a delusional Arkham Asylum mental patient who thinks he is some hero named Batman--or is he delusional? See I'M BATMAN for the guidelines for this article.

Any colonizer is welcome to edit the article! Any non-colonizer who wants to apply is welcome to do so on the Imperial Colonization page. We promise we won't throw you to the sharks. Well, probably not.

The future[edit]

We are taking nominations and votes for our next project. As per previous IC discussions, old nominations which aren't in the lead and which haven't received any recent votes will be removed. Check out the current nominations before they fade into history--but an article removed from the list can certainly be renominated. Nominate and vote on the IC page.

Go forth and colonize! Why do I need to provide this?, Uncyclopedian Priest and Buccaneer Admiral of Uncyclopedia Imperial Colonization Project IC Buccaneer Admiral WHY??? (stratagems)  03:44, March 4, 2010 (UTC)

Imperial Colonization Buccaneer Admiral walking the plank![edit]

IMPORTANT: If you want to make comments on any part of this message, please post your comments on the IC talk page. I've sent this notice out to about 40 people, and will likely never see your response if you put it on your talk page. But if you insist on doing it anyway (sigh), please at least start a new section using == (Your comments) == below my signature, or click the + tab up above, and make comments there. This message is set up as a template, so if you try to make edits in this message, it will edit it everywhere, and get me nasty notes from admins.

Actually, I'm looking for a temporary assistant/permanent successor as head of Imperial Colonization. I got put in charge of IC because I kept bugging a certain admin. I'd say, "Why isn't somebody doing this with IC?" and "Why isn't somebody doing that with IC?" So that admin basically said "Why, you're somebody; go do it" (see discussion here). But as you can see, I took on the position planning to update IC, get it moving again, and see it through one colonization. Well, that happened. IC was updated and reactivated and, thanks to some great colonizers, Creationism was recreated in a spirit of cooperation, was rewritten on deadline, was Pee Reviewed and, as a bonus, was voter-chosen as a feature article within about a day of being nommed. Our current project, Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization/Batman is scheduled to be written by 20 March, and then we'll begin another. IC is moving...and I'm looking for someone to keep it moving. If interested, please post a note on the IC talk page--experienced and successful users only need apply. Ability to say "ARRRRR" like a pirate is not required, but would be nice.

Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  16:54, March 17, 2010 (UTC)

Who's Batman?[edit]

A reminder that you voted for Batman as part of Imperial Colonization (see here). Remember that if you vote for, it means you intend to help write the article (see there). Fortunately, the writing period has received an extension of one week to 20 March, so you still have time to make edits. Otherwise, you may find yourself a "client" at Arkham Asylum. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  22:39, March 17, 2010 (UTC)

Warning: Discord Ahead[edit]

Note for you only--you had voted for Batman but did not participate. I see you haven't been around, and hope you return. But because you voted for and didn't participate, you've been retired from Imperial Colonization. However, should you return, you can reapply on the IC page to be restored to your former glory. I'm posting this note here a courtesy as you voted for Discordianism. Hope to see you back!

As you voted for Discordianism, you're getting this special advance welcome as approved by Goddess Discordia. You're invited to post your ideas for colonizing the article here. Any colonizer is welcome to participate, of course--but you're obligated to or GODDESS WILL GET YOU! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  05:03, March 21, 2010 (UTC)

Please check the note in italics above. I restored you to the active list because I saw you made productive edits to Discordianism. Also I know that while you voted for Batman and then didn't participate, you weren't active here period, so I understand real life probably intruded. The main reason for having people reapply is because it helps me keep everything straight--I had another member make edits to an article that I didn't even notice for a month or two, and it made extra work for lazy me to check histories in order to give them credit. In any case, welcome back! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  01:43, April 14, 2010 (UTC)

Mecca Vice[edit]

Thanks a mil for the review. If I fix up the things you mentioned would you be willing to nom it for VFH? Mecca Vice seems to be my best chance. So far no FA out of 115 articles that stuck. Booo Hooooo!!!! Sob! Sniff! Thanks in any case. Much appreciated. Cheers!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png 19:39, Apr 24

Vote now for Colonisation[edit]

Hello ladies, gentlemen, and other,

As you may be aware we have now reached the point where April's Colonisation, Discordianism, has been successfully moved to mainspace, and we are currently voting on our colonisation for May.

As I have been press-ganged encouraged strongly to take the reigns of IC, I'm sending this out to remind all current and previous members of IC to vote on next months colonisation. Voting is taking place here as we speak. As of 1st of May I will be announcing the page that will get our tender mercies, so I encourage you to vote - or nominate - now.

Good luck, and may the farce be with you!

PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 03:35, Apr 27 2010 UTC

Discordianism has been added to VFH. Go, read, enjoy, vote. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 09:45, Apr 28 2010 UTC

Thanks for your support[edit]

ArkhamBatman.jpg Arkham Asylum thanks you for your generous support. Because of donations from dedicated Gotham City citizens like you, we can afford to keep
Bruce Wayne
safe from himself for another six months.
He was also chosen as our
Featured inmate patient
for April 24, 2010!

PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 09:50, Apr 28 2010 UTC



Thank you for letting all of the ghosts loose to spook the denizens of the front page. Not only did nobody log onto Uncy that day, but the ghosts scared the bejesus out of all of the IP's, and not one vandalism occurred in the 24 hour period. Ghost Power! Thanks again, Aleister des chain 22:54 30 4 MMX

on the right, Chief Adaylateandadollarshort thanks you too!

Noobish Excitement Over New Sig[edit]

--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 00:45, May 3, 2010 (UTC)

Welcome to the club! —Pelozurian (talk) 00:48, 3 May 2010 (UTC)
Yeah, I figured I might as well make one since I have no life free time.--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 00:55, May 3, 2010 (UTC)

Mecca Vice will skip your home[edit]

"Much thanks!"

--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png 06:49, May 3

Don't Eat the Yellow Snow[edit]

I had a look at it and I'm very impressed with the work that was done with it since the review. The strange guy and the trashbag was good, and every thing else looks great. Probaly the only advice I'll give to you is to get someone else opinion, because people can vary on opinions. Keep up the good work--Grue ApocalypseDirectorEye 4.gifWILLExplode 3.GIFYOU 333Talk IF YOU DARE 01:17, May 4, 2010 (UTC)

Cool, man. Thanks for looking it over again.--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 01:18, May 4, 2010 (UTC)

VFG, and Poop throwing monkeys[edit]

Thank you very much for understanding Poop throwing monkeys. During the non-serious VFH process I realized what you did, that it actually is--if I may brag because it was inadvertant or subconscious--a profound commentary on a human's ability to revert to our apehood within moments. Making the guy an antropologist was in response to a comment on the VFH nom that the article isn't antropological. To shorten this, thank you for your votes, you made Dennis Kucinich's wife GOOD and brought Poop throwing monkeys to within one vote. Appreciated. Al sans chains 1:40 7 5 MMX

Some of the most absurdly humorous things can make you realize a rather deep meaning or idea.--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 18:28, May 8, 2010 (UTC)

Jet lag[edit]

I did that review while you were asleep. To be honest, I didn't even see your booking.--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN Candidate NOTM USS Pees Stain ) 18:23, May 9, 2010 (UTC)

YOU DID WHAT?! Nah, it's fine. As long as FunnyBony is getting feedback.--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 19:42, May 9, 2010 (UTC)


Hi. I know not all of Bradbury's stuff is sci-fi, and we should mention that early on in his section (maybe not in a long paragraph but it may work). To reveal only a smidgeon about myself, I know Bradbury quite well, and love the old fucker. He's written every day (can't write now but dictates to his daughter every day) since he was 12 years old--every day for 78 years! Just imagine if he had the internet to play with! Anyway, many of his short stories do fall under SF, but most don't, and you're right to point that out. Must go now, places to be, enjoy. Al sand chains 20:02 9 5 MMX

Jeez, no, I wasn't thinking you were doing a hate rant. I was just thinking that the piece is going to be soooo long that we probably have to keep sections short, so the Bradbury thing can be a phrase rather than a long paragraph. I haven't checked out your edits yet, and look forward to it. Will do so soon. Live long and prosper (maybe we should put that right at the top or near the top!!!) Al des chains 23:53 9 5 mmx

Red Sea[edit]

Really good one. Better idea-concept than Sand Storm. I was going to Pee Review it, and I made a couple tiny edits, but I find nothing wrong, so I would get accused of not making a proper Pee. If you want it up for VFH let me know. But if you wait, some cat will, maybe, see something to improve. BTW: When you part the sea it offers great surfing to nuts like AdwareLaird Hamilton who will play at the top edges of the parting. But I'm ready to Nom it. Cheers!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png 09:59, May 10

I like the surfing idea, I hadn't thought of that. I'll have to get around to adding that in sometime today. Thanks for the positive comments and ideas!--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 16:33, May 10, 2010 (UTC)
Yes, a better idea-concept than Sandstorm (but hey!). Wanted to second Funnybony's idea of using the parting sea to surf on. When parted the best way to surf it would be to jump the board across when the waves come strong right up to the edge and then are stopped--never thought of that, in a parted sea the waves would still be coming, and must be magically stopped, but the momentum would still carry the surfer over the chasm. Cool. Some language tweeks and you've got my vote 4sure. Al sans chains 17:05 10 5 MMX
CAN I NOM THIS?--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png 13:57, May 12
I just asked ChiefJusticeDS for a review. After he does one and I correct whatever it is he thinks needs improving, then nom away.--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 17:06, May 12, 2010 (UTC)

Marsellus Wallace...[edit]

...had been unedited in over a week, making it a candidate for deletion. Howver, as I can see you've put quite a lot of effort into it and I've seen your name about the place a few times, I haven't huffed it and you can now find it in your userspace. Feel free to move it back into mainspace once you've finished it. :-) Rabbi Techno Icons-flag-gb.png kvetch Icon rabbi.gif Contribs Foxicon.png FOXES 08:08, May 11, 2010 (UTC)

Many thanks. Just needs a bit more content and some nice pretty pictures of his head on a Transformer's body or something...--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 13:41, May 11, 2010 (UTC)

Welcome to UnNews[edit]

The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir Zim_ulator, contemplating your fate.

Welcome to UnNews, Striker2117, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.

I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.

Good things that can happen to you

You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.

What happened to my article?

If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.

Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.

Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?

UnNews Audio

If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.

UnNews UnFunnies

At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.

This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir rev. zim_ulator (Talk - Edits Logs) I am the dirt under your rollers. 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC)

Part the Red Sea[edit]

Some enterprising Israeli takes advantage of the "parting" phenomena as Moses marches the Jews to the other side

A day in Uncyclopedic history - Christian Bale has been featured![edit]

ChristianBaleAward.jpg Matfen
thanks you
for your vote!

His article could not have been featured without you...

Thank you brother, may your packs of M&M's always be full to the brim. Except for what I steal out of them for coming dangerously close to tl;dr. Mwahahaha... --Matfen 12:29, May 15, 2010 (UTC)

Red Sea[edit]

Nice, I've been checking on the changes every once in awhile and it has come along very well. The sea has parted for you, and you have taken the shortest pathway across. Congrats. Al des chains 16:58 16 5 mmx

I thank you for your thanks and for advice and grammatical fixes. I recently contacted Moses to check if it would be okay to base this off of his life, and he said "I don't want whatever it is you're selling". I took that as a yes.--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 18:00, May 16, 2010 (UTC)

The Uncyclopedia Conspiracy[edit]

Don't forget to tie in the mysterious "h" into your article. Does it stand for humo(u)r, or SOMETHING ELSE ENTIRELY???Pelozurian (talk) 00:56, 17 May 2010 (UTC)


H can't stand for "humour", it has to stand for something much, much darker...--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 14:33, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

The review[edit]

Well thanks for the review, I thought you rated it pretty fairly. I'll get round to rewriting it and take on board what you said, but the article was written originally for Illogicopedia - I'm still kinda adjusting to Uncyclopedia's higher standards. --SadisticWolf 14:23, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

Don't sweat it, my first two articles here were complete crap and I like to pretend they don't exist. Happy rewriting.--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 14:33, May 18, 2010 (UTC)

Red Sea (part deux)[edit]

Hey did your review & voted too. Let me know what you think.  Happytimes are here!* (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  20 May 2010 ~ 06:10 (UTC)

HowTo:Piss on a sandstorm[edit]

Thanks for your vote on Warm piss sandstorm. The best way to enjoy beer is to mix it with sand, microwave this microbrew, and then piss in it! Soon you will have a drink fit for the Queen and her elderly prince son, Charles. Thanks again, appreciated, Al des chains 16:02 21 5 MMX


It appears that you have now done 5 in-depth pee reviews, and are eligible to be a member of PEEING. Just put a request on the page there, and Chief will look at it. If he approves, you're officially a fresh stain. You get to be on the stain table! Your friends will think you're so cool! You'll also become eligible for RotM when you become a stain. So, do it! Now!--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN Candidate NOTM USS Pees Stain ) On Friday, 08:48, May 21 2010 UTC

Part the Red Sea has parted the main page[edit]

Congrats! Moses would be proud of you, although he would have gone into a shit fit somewhere along the line (brother had a temper!). Yay! Al sans chains 22:42 21 5 MMX

The Uncyclopedia Conspiracy[edit]

I have moved it into your userspace as the maintenance tag expired. --ChiefjusticeDS 07:05, May 24, 2010 (UTC)

Award from UN:REQ[edit]

Thumbs up2.jpg

This user created Don't Eat The Yellow Snow, an article originally requested on Uncyclopedia:Requested Articles. Good for them us!
(for more information, see award statistics)

Thumbs up2.jpg

This user created Why?:Is a raven like a writing desk?, an article originally requested on Uncyclopedia:Requested Articles. Good for them us!
(for more information, see award statistics)

Gore Theory[edit]

Hi mate. I'm just putting together the brief for USP, and as part of that I want this to be able to be produced outside of the bounds of the Uncyc servers. So, what would your feeling be towards this being reprinted in a separate publication? (At this stage there will be no commercial attribution involved with the possible exception of spruiking Unshoppe.) Attribution for the piece will be to you as your username. Let me know what you think. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Monday, 23:57, Jun 14 2010 UTC

Completely fine by me, reprint as needed wherever you want to.--Sirrah CatshirE Chess the Striker2117 03:11, June 18, 2010 (UTC)