User talk:Why do I need to provide this?

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I AIN'T GOT, GOT, AIN'T GOT NO TIME

My time here right now is going to be rather limited. My life is undergoing some major changes, but not all bad. Among them is a chance to work on a book with a collaborator or two or three. That actually already started, which is why my writing here dropped off. I will still be checking in, and if you really want to reach me quickly you can click on E-mail this user on the bottom left. You're a great group of people! (Well, most of you).

Contents

Post New Posts at Bottom of This Page[edit]

“Whyner is totally awesome!”

~ My mother on Why do I need to provide this?


“Dumbass kid. He's the reason I left his mother. I think. Which girl was she again?”

~ My father on Why do I need to provide this?


“Why is ghey lolz0rz”

~ My son on Why do I need to provide this?


Why do I need to provide this?
aka
Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn) 


(2 Sept. 2009 - 1 Oct. 2009) * (2 Oct. 2009 - 12 Oct. 2009) * (13 Oct. 2009 - 1 Nov. 2009) * (2 Nov. 2009 - 12 Nov. 2009) * (13 Nov. 2009 - 11 Dec. 2009) * (11 Dec. 2009 - 31 Dec. 2009) * (1 Jan. 2010 - 12 Feb. 2010) * (13 Feb. 2010 - 28 Mar. 2010)

Am I a slut? Vote HERE

...IN THE ASS![edit]

Win?Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! CUN.png Icons-flag-us.png NOTM 03:12, March 29, 2010 (UTC)

DAMN YOU HELPME! Why was mine...! —Paizuri MUN (Talk Contribs Poll!) 03:12, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
He's my father, and thus I have an obligation to fuck his talk page.Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! CUN.png Icons-flag-us.png NOTM 03:14, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
Fine, but next time...your ass will be mine! —Paizuri MUN (Talk Contribs Poll!) 03:15, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
Next time maybe I'll schedule appointments. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:21, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
Scheduling appointments? Where was that slut poll again? PuppyOnTheRadio - The Signature Collection Talk Monday, 03:22, Mar 29 2010 UTC
Top of this page. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:23, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
He would choose me over that Pelargonium loser, any day of the week.Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! CUN.png Icons-flag-us.png NOTM 03:25, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
Yeah, incest is best. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:35, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
NO! I even put on a new sig for you! --PaizuMaj. • JStwMUNLOBCrapWHORE • (Talk) 03:59, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
Incest.png
Oh god what the hell is this. --PaizuMaj. • JStwMUNLOBCrapWHORE • (Talk) 04:02, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
That's our family! Puppy and Syndrome weren't there at the time, but from left to right that's Grandma Miley, Great Grandpa Cainad who's holding daughter Puffskein who's holding daughter Little Mermaid, and me, Daddy Why??? holding Rifting--you can't see him, but he's in the bowl under the bananas. I don't know where son HELPME was--oh, I remember. He was under the table. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  20:14, March 29, 2010 (UTC)
Ding! I am now deeply disturbed.  Happytimes are here!* http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/9/94/Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  30 Mar 2010 ~ 00:50 (UTC)
DISCLAIMER: I am not responsible for uploading that pic to Uncyclopedia; I am not responsible for posting it on my talk page; and I did not request it be uploaded or posted, so I'm not responsible for that either. Also I'm not very responsible. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  21:48, March 31, 2010 (UTC)
If you think that picture is fun, spare a thought for the pictures I rejected before choosing that one, plus the length of time I had to look at it while doing the editing that I did. (If anything goes wrong, just remember, it's all Why's fault.) PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 23:42, Mar 31 2010 UTC
It's all Why's fault? Naturally.) Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  00:25, April 1, 2010 (UTC)

Rape![edit]

Am I late? FreddThe Redd http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/thumb/7/70/Flag_of_Egypt.png/22px-Flag_of_Egypt.png http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/thumb/5/5b/Foxicon.png/18px-Foxicon.png 04:18 • Monday, 29-03-2010

Not at all. --PaizuMaj. • JStwMUNLOBCrapWHORE • (Talk) 04:20, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
No, you can rape me anytime. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn) 
I see what u did thar... --PaizuMaj. • JStwMUNLOBCrapWHORE • (Talk) 04:23, 29 March 2010 (UTC)
HELPME: Son, imitating me, that's one thing, but pretending to be me, that's something else. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  19:48, March 29, 2010 (UTC)

Upsilon Sigma Sigma[edit]

Brother Recognition Date Points Rank/Title
Skinfan13 8 March 2010 9 Founder
Why do I need to provide this? 29 March 2010 1000 Supreme Commander of Back Asswards
Guildensternenstein 10 March 2010 0 Brother
CheddarBBQ 10 March 2010 0 Brother
Aleister in Chains 11 March 2010 4 Brother
Pelargonium 13 March 2010 4 Brother
Happytimes 25 March 2010 0 Brother
Miley Spears 25 March 2010 0 Sister
PuppyOnTheRadio 29 March 2010 0 Brother
HELPME 31 March 2010 0 Brother

If you don't believe me, see here. Check out USS; it's something like IC, only ass backwards. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  19:56, March 29, 2010 (UTC)

let me fix that table for ya --Sir Skinfan13 Talk {< CUN RotM FBotM VFH ΥΣΣ Maj. SK >} 23:09 EST 30 Mar, 2010
Say, thanks for the fix! Now I'm a bad ass! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  21:49, March 31, 2010 (UTC)

Your sig fails[edit]

You're not a CUN. Your sig links to that.Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! CUN.png Icons-flag-us.png NOTM 03:06, March 31, 2010 (UTC)

I really hope you aren't serious. —Paizuri MUN (Talk Contribs Poll!) 03:10, 31 March 2010 (UTC)
I hope you're not serious about that above comment. Scroll over his Rabbi sig and then look at his user page. Dummy.Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! CUN.png Icons-flag-us.png NOTM 03:13, March 31, 2010 (UTC)
Oh yeah. What I did was make a new sig from an old sig from back in the day when I was a CUN and not a KUN. I'll fix it now. Thanks for pointing it out (that's your job, after all, pointing out my mistakes). Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:17, March 31, 2010 (UTC)
Also I love you too, Pel. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:19, March 31, 2010 (UTC)
Oh haha, I didn't know about that. O_O I'll be leaving now...Paizuri MUN (Talk Contribs Poll!) 03:21, 31 March 2010 (UTC)
No wait! I want to show you my new pet pink snake. I keep him right here in my pants. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:25, March 31, 2010 (UTC)
Oh, can he play with my pet snake (in my pants too)? —Paizuri MUN (Talk Contribs Poll!) 03:28, 31 March 2010 (UTC)
Er, um...I'll be getting off now. Seriously, I'm about to log off. See ya all later! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:31, March 31, 2010 (UTC)
You sound like Puppy! I'm going to take you to a courtroom if you continue this sexual harassment!Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! CUN.png Icons-flag-us.png NOTM 03:35, March 31, 2010 (UTC)
I don't get off anywhere near as often as Why's snake. Ritter Generaloberst CPT PuppyOnTheRadio GUN WotM UotM RotM NotM VFH CM Ninjastar.png ΥΣΣ Wednesday, 04:18, Mar 31 2010 UTC
Father WHY??? is a CUN too.Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! CUN.png Icons-flag-us.png NOTM 06:21, April 4, 2010 (UTC)
I guess so. It's also an old sig I thought I'd use for Easter. Have to fix it (you realize probably nobody notices these things but you, but thanks!). Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  06:25, April 4, 2010 (UTC)
I notice every mistake you make. I also notice every mistake everyone else makes. Pointing out mistakes makes me feel good...Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! CUN.png Icons-flag-us.png NOTM 06:47, April 4, 2010 (UTC)

It's no big deal, Why, really![edit]

Please don't chew out Funnybony, he's a good guy! He meant well, and there's no rule against him nomming my article. Yes, naturally, I would enjoy a Pee Review, but since a nom is the next step (hopefully), this is only good news! You're right, it would have been kosher to review it and then nominate it, but he isn't under any obligation to. (Not all of us are jews, you know :P) And hey, if someone reviews it thanks to your notice, all the better! But Pee Review is for helping to improve articles. Funnybony didn't think it could be improved upon (*snerk*), so giving a review was a pointless exercise in his eyes. But really, man, it's OK! Thank you, I really do appreciate that you care, but I think your passions are a little misplaced. Necropaxx (T) {~} Wednesday, 21:30, Mar 31 2010

Thanks for your post. My point was not just for your particular situation, but in general. As I said, if it happened to me, I'd be pissed. It may not bother you, but I'm sure I'm not the only writer here it would bother. And even if I was the only writer, I'd still post a comment. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  21:35, March 31, 2010 (UTC)
Oh, and please, for the sake of all that is holy, get that hideous picture off your talk page! Necropaxx (T) {~} Wednesday, 21:31, Mar 31 2010
As someone put it up there, if you ask someone, perhaps he'll do some coding thing so you'll only see it if you click on it. Anyone has my permission to do that if you want. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  21:41, March 31, 2010 (UTC)

I think you need this[edit]

Oh Dear...[edit]

Beware! The evil eye is upon thee!

Hello, Why do I need to provide this?, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Unfortunately, we've noticed that your contributions - not to put too fine a point on it - have been crap. Basically, we think you're a spammer/vandal/10-year-old. But don't despair! We have ways to make you talk.. ahem. I mean, there are ways to get you out of this mess.

If you read anything at all, make it the above three links. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, try these:

Good luck and I'm sorry you got off to such a bad start. I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! Please sign your name on talk pages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (Button sig.png) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.

If you need help or think this template has been placed unfairly, please ask me or an admin on their talk page, rather than going bat-fuck-insane. Alternatively you can ask at the Dump, or add the following: {{help}} to this page along with a message and someone will come along and help you if they can. Again, welcome!  -- [sire] EMC [TALK] 22:55 Mar 31 2010

Gee, thanks for the welcome! If I'm new here, does that mean I qualify to run for NotM again and can continue making lots of stupid mistakes only now once again I can claim I'm too new to know any better? Cool! Absolutely new user Why do I need to provide this? 23:00, March 31, 2010 (UTC)
Everyone knows that half of the NotM winners have been sockpuppets. The other half were the intelligent monkeys that Mordillo gave computers to in 2007 for some weird sociology thing. If you're the newcomer, right, I expect you to suck my ass with jelly. Some people prefer syrup, but I prefer jelly. -- [sire] EMC [TALK] 23:04 Mar 31 2010
Everybody knows that Puppies eat socks. (It's true - I haven't got a single pair of unchewed socks left.) PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 23:39, Mar 31 2010 UTC
Everybody knows that Puppies don't wear socks. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  00:24, April 1, 2010 (UTC)

UpsilonSS[edit]

Actually, I'd really appreciate your input on all of the non-writing stuff. We're getting a whole bunch of new members, but not very many are voting on the stuff within the group. I'll link you the March newsletter to point you in the direction of the stuff we're voting on right now. -- Skinfan1319:59 EST 31 Mar, 2010

All right; will check it out. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  00:21, April 1, 2010 (UTC)

hai[edit]

im a totly nw usr ths loks kewlPLZHELPME 02:54, April 1, 2010 (UTC)

Yeah, you should adopt that totally new user.Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! CUN.png Icons-flag-us.png NOTM 03:00, April 1, 2010 (UTC)
go awy HELPME u suxPLZHELPME 03:02, April 1, 2010 (UTC)
What thew hell you rude person?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!!?!?!?!?!!!?!?!?!??!!??!?!Sir ¬_¬ | Banter HOMOPHOBE!!! CUN.png Icons-flag-us.png NOTM 03:09, April 1, 2010 (UTC)
What was that thing they said Bruce Wayne had? Dissociative identity disorder? Also I was editing my user page so you both vandalised and edit conflicted me. I think that deserves a spanking. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  01:43, April 2, 2010 (UTC)

Nice work[edit]

Your vote yesterday, noobwise. Noble. That's the way I wish every award could finish, and you made it happen. Yay. Al en'chain 1:34 2 4 mmx

 :-) Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  01:40, April 2, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 1th April 2010 - Always on time[edit]

PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Friday, 04:50, Apr 2 2010 UTC

Notice everyone who's mentioned as having gotten banned in this issue is an admin--except me. Hmm.... <insert name here> 02:43, April 3, 2010 (UTC)

VFS[edit]

SAFPAS.png For your vote in VFS

and as promised last time
You have been awarded a Certificate guaranteeing you safe passage whilst inside those areas of Uncyclopedia under Zionist domination.
Certificate also redeemable for one (1) free bagel at your nearest grocery - simply print out and present
to the shopkeeper to claim your free bagel with the filling of your choice.

Rabbi Techno

Discordian[edit]

Hi, and I'm going on a vacation! Yay! Until the middle of next week, the 7 or 8 April. When I get back I'll do my edit stuff on Discordianism, and see what I can add, subtract, or. . .mutiply! Enjoy. Al de'chain 17:43 2 4 mmx

Have fun on your vacation! Of course you might not see this until you get back, in which case I hope you had fun on your vacation! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  02:36, April 3, 2010 (UTC)

/* Thank you */[edit]

Thanks for your condolences, from my wife and I both. I'm really touched by the sentiments of my friends here. Cheers. rev. zim_ulator (Talk - Edits Logs) I am the dirt under your rollers. 01:42, April 3, 2010 (UTC)

Certainly. Hope things are going well. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:30, April 8, 2010 (UTC)

n00b kweshin[edit]

I haven't ask you a noob question for a while. As your illegitimate child I'm destined to run rogue while receiving minimal care from my estranged father, but when you die I'll come back and use my bloodline as a basis to claim your throne. Oh yes, before I forget, the noob question was, how do I edit redirects? User:Hiatus Hernia/sig2 09:24, Apr 7, 2010

Hey, sweet almost-a-daughter-of-mine! If I don't answer your question below, let me know.
Let's say GOD redirects to God (which it does).
1) Go to GOD. You'll end up at God and see a note at the top that says "(Redirected from GOD)" with a link to GOD.
2) Click on the link to GOD. You'll see something like "GOD Redirect page --> God."
3) Click on the edit button and edit it.
Hope this helps! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:26, April 8, 2010 (UTC)
Yes, thanks. User:Hiatus Hernia/sig2 14:33, Apr 8, 2010

Vanity page[edit]

Does Why?:Do I need to provide this? count as a second vanity page? PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 22:20, Apr 7 2010 UTC

Good call. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:17, April 8, 2010 (UTC)

You're the meaning in my life, you're the inspiraaaation![edit]

Old hag receptionist.jpg And what do you want?

You think that because you voted for Why?:Do I need to provide this? you'll get some kind of thank you from Necropaxx?
Ha!

Thanks for having such an inspirational username, Why! And I owe it all to youuuuu... Necropaxx (T) {~} Wednesday, 22:43, Apr 7 2010

You're welcome. And actually you owe it all to my getting frustrated because I was trying to sign up with user names that already existed, then saw a certain phrase.... Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:29, April 8, 2010 (UTC)
Really...? Pray tell, what kinda names did you have in mind before your attention was turned to the fateful question? —Pelozurian (talk) 03:37, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
HELPME, Pelargonium, and PuppyOnTheRadio. I don't care if I wasn't an Uncyc user then.--Sir ~HELPME~ Count! Awards! Pee! Help! 03:42, April 8, 2010 (UTC)
Honestly, I have no idea--too long ago. When I signed up I wasn't planning to become an active user, so just wanted to grab something. When I realized I was going to be active, I wished I'd chosen something shorter than Why do I need to provide this? 03:47, April 8, 2010 (UTC)
But now you don't, of course. —Pelozurian (talk) 03:51, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
It's still slightly annoying having to type the long version of my name every time I want to sign in or make a new user page, but having a feature article inspired by my name is pretty darn cool. Why do I need to provide this? 03:54, April 8, 2010 (UTC)
Me too! Rabbi When do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and not-so-humble Buccaneer Admiral of Imperial Colonization IC Rabbi WHEN??? (shmuesn)  04:05, April 8, 2010 (UTC)
And ny name's hard with all those upper and lowercase letters. I Am Not PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  04:08, April 8, 2010 (UTC)
And my name's hard on account of my lazyness. —Pelozurian (talk) 04:49, 8 April 2010 (UTC)
I know the feeling - I can't even be bothered contributing any more. Not --Sir Hardwick Fundlebuggy (Bleat) 04:50, April 8, 2010 (UTC)
My name fucking kicks ass! (just thought you should know.)  Happytimes are here!* http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/9/94/Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  08 Apr 2010 ~ 04:57 (UTC)
We know it does, Geah. —Pelozurian (talk) 04:59, 8 April 2010 (UTC)

Hey gaiz. Mah username sux donkey boalz. Kthxbi. SIRE FREDDMOOSHA Lord of Egypt AMUSE ME 19:29, April 17, 2010 (UTC)

You know what would be a really cool user name? Mahmoosha. Someone should use that. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  04:21, April 18, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 4/8/10 - Oh hi Signpost.[edit]

Pleb CUN KUN Dexter111344 Complain here Vote now! 20:20, April 8, 2010 (UTC)

My user page was featured![edit]

Don't believe me? See here. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  21:06, April 9, 2010 (UTC)

You remember your part of the bargain, yes? I want to see Necropaxx on the front page by the end of the month. Necropaxx (T) {~} Friday, 22:45, Apr 9 2010
Hmm, I could always make Necropaxx a redirect to one of your feature articles.... Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  23:03, April 9, 2010 (UTC)

Seriously though...[edit]

I answered your question in the edit summary. Pleb CUN KUN Dexter111344 Complain here Vote now! 22:57, April 9, 2010 (UTC)

I just saw it. Thanks for posting it and this note. I may take back some of the 10,000 nasty things I was going to say about you poopsmiths. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  23:02, April 9, 2010 (UTC)

Yo[edit]

You should use this template I made to keep track of your vandalism count. If you don't, I will hunt you down and rape your children (except HELPME, for obvious reasons) —Pelozurian (talk) 01:19, 14 April 2010 (UTC)

Added. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  01:26, April 14, 2010 (UTC)
You can add how many times it was vandalized by doing this: {{Vandalized|9000}} or however many times it's happened. —Pelozurian (talk) 01:30, 14 April 2010 (UTC)
OK cool. I'll do that. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  01:33, April 14, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 15/4/10 - Yet another on time delivery.[edit]

--ChiefjusticeDS 21:27, April 15, 2010 (UTC)

Bruce Wayne[edit]

Hi. Before you leave as Captain of the Colonization ship, perchance time to give Bruce Wayne the heave ho and replace it with our Batman. Thanks for keeping some of my changes to it, trying to funny it up a bit as requested on the talk page (some of the changes you kept I really like and laughed at myself). Bruce Wayne somehow seems like a more appropriate name anyhow, taking the page's concept into consideration. Thanks for all the hard work, and I know it's not easy by a long shot. Yay service well done! Aleister in Chains 23:37 16 4 MMX

Thanks and stuff. I thought many of the changes you made were definite improvements, and its funnier as a result. Shall we form a mutual admiration society? Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  23:48, April 16, 2010 (UTC)
Of course. I'll bring the "cookies" (i.e. brownies i.e. fine herb and grains) for the party. Do you have anyone to succeed you as yet (and no, Goddess no, I'm not offering to get anywhere close to that job)? I really hope the next page is the Science Fiction one, or that it at least comes up in the next month or so. That could really be a classic. Must sign off now, things to do and peoples to see. Enjoy. Aleister a few minutes later 23:54 16 4 mmx
No successors, unfortunately. As I said before, I originally only planned to lead it for one colonization, and we're now finishing the third under my command. Hopefully someone will step forward and take over. By the way, Batman's move in in progress. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  23:57, April 16, 2010 (UTC)
Maybe Socky?--Sir ~HELPME~ Count! Awards! Pee! Help! 23:59, April 16, 2010 (UTC)
If you can talk Socky into taking it over, more power to you. Also Batman is now Bruce Wayne with Batman a redirect. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  00:26, April 17, 2010 (UTC)

Double redirects[edit]

I believe you made a shit ton. Fix them. -- [sire] EMC [TALK] 06:17 Apr 17 2010

You did make a shit ton, I have fixed them for you, grovel appropriately and I shall not beat you with the banstick. --ChiefjusticeDS 08:10, April 17, 2010 (UTC)
I did? I honestly checked Special:DoubleRedirects after I redirected Batman because I was concerned that might happen, and the only one it listed was the Redirect page. Have any idea why I didn't see more? Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  17:53, April 17, 2010 (UTC)
Purge it next time. It was probably your cache. -- [sire] EMC [TALK] 18:46 Apr 17 2010
I thought of that, but I hadn't visited that page in days, and my cache was purged. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  04:19, April 18, 2010 (UTC)
Do you think I would be in Admiral? 800px-Flag of the Philippines svg.png | King Joseph® GiratinaOriginForme.png | Contact Goa Tse Clan Priest | Goa Tse Clan Sign Up | Rouge.gif | 08:43, April 18, 2010 (UTC)
Sorry I didn't answer this earlier, but I'm not sure I understand what you're asking. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  21:45, April 20, 2010 (UTC)

Thank you for your compliment[edit]

I will keep this as a treasure in my heart and honor your name wherever I go. I shall call forth from mountaintops: "User:why do I need to provide this, you have inspired me, uplifted me, and my genital warts have nothing to do with you. Thank-your kindness. It shall return to you ten-fold, and perhaps you will win the lottery, but probably not. mrthejazz I don't know if this image is the right size, but I'm trying. (please talk to me i'm lonely.) 05:41, April 19, 2010 (UTC)

Wow. Just wow. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  19:30, April 23, 2010 (UTC)

Bruce Wayne on VFH[edit]

Mentioning this to you isn't whoring, per say, as you are the daddy of the page. Bruce Wayne has been up on VFH for a couple of days, and has over eight votes already, and probably only needs a couple more to obtain featurehood. Why not go make your mark over there and round up a couple of other cowboys on the street to put it over the top. Almost there, Al sans chains 21:21 22 4 MMX

Thanks! Voted! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  19:29, April 23, 2010 (UTC)
Hey, great collaboration job you guys. I laughed at this from the start and it held my attention the whole way through.--Sir Shandon GUN.png (Talk) (Trophy Room) 01:21, April 24, 2010 (UTC)
Glad you liked it and thanks for saying so! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  01:22, April 24, 2010 (UTC)

I'm Very Serious[edit]

I may not word it well but I very serious indeed, God is angered by the way people are deliberately taking His name in vain, the way gays and other deviants are rampaging around His creation.. I am serious indeed about such blatant sin --God-Is-Cool 19:28, April 23, 2010 (UTC)

I appreciate your apparent sincerity, but the way you started out you're likely to get people to close you out. Think how you would feel if some complete stranger walked up to you and insulted you and told you you're completely wrong? Would you be more likely to listen to them or to listen to someone who helped you and was productive and that you got to know and respect, then got involved in a discussion and presented their point of view that was different than yours? Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  19:34, April 23, 2010 (UTC)
Haha. As if God's out to get us or something. Why, you probably know this but there's not much reasoning with these types of people. —Pelozurian (talk) 21:42, 23 April 2010 (UTC)
Fuck! I just went for a walk and I saw two gays rampaging around God's creation. I said to myself WTF!! and got back into the house as quick as I could. Aleister sans chains 21:47 23 4
Yes, Paizuri, I know (assuming this person is serious--I still have my doubts). But at least I tried. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  01:03, April 24, 2010 (UTC)
He may be serious, but when you condemn Catholics, retards and the Dutch to he'll, you can't expect to be taken seriously. I wonder if there is a link between this and a recent IP edit of report a problem. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Saturday, 01:07, Apr 24 2010 UTC

You talked me into it[edit]

I'll act as Admiral for May if there are no other takers, but I reserve the right to abdicate in June if I don't feel that I've done it well enough, or if I get bored and decide instead to start knitting, or anything else more interesting comes along. I also reserve the right to wield power like a dictatorial maniac (otherwise what's the point?) PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Saturday, 02:10, Apr 24 2010 UTC

Cool and stuff! If you'd like me to assist you, I'll be happy to. I'm still finishing up things for Bruce Wayne and for Discordianism, and have been preparing a list of the type of things I've done as head of IC. There's more to it than it looks. I'll get that to you before May comes around. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  02:16, April 24, 2010 (UTC)

thnx fr the welcmoe

Thing[edit]

I updated the HoS numbers based on Bruce Wayne. I gave credit to the people I felt were the prime writers (Which I felt were you, Al, Miley, and Socky, and Miley and Socky weren't in there) Do you want to add any others or was that good?--Sir ~HELPME~ Count! Awards! Pee! Help! 02:32, April 24, 2010 (UTC)

In your revert, you talked about a talk page note...what talk page note?--Sir ~HELPME~ Count! Awards! Pee! Help! 02:34, April 24, 2010 (UTC)
Check your talk page. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  02:39, April 24, 2010 (UTC)
While I'm here, did you do that on purpose?--Sir ~HELPME~ Count! Awards! Pee! Help! 03:30, April 24, 2010 (UTC)
Do what? (No; I caught it right after I did it and then fixed it--thanks). Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  03:31, April 24, 2010 (UTC)

IC credit[edit]

Hey I want my Bruce Wayne credit! SIRE FREDDMOOSHA Lord of Egypt AMUSE ME 05:11, April 24, 2010 (UTC)

See here. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  06:11, April 24, 2010 (UTC)
But I didn't just "write a sentence or two, or correct a few spelling mistakes". I wrote a whole paragraph, or something. SIRE FREDDMOOSHA Lord of Egypt AMUSE ME 06:38, April 24, 2010 (UTC)
The post says nothing about you, personally; it applies to all colonizers. I regret that I probably won't have this done until Monday, as I said in the post. I will consider how much someone edited the article, how much they contributed to the planning and organization of the article, how much they helped with getting images and writing captions, and certainly with how much of what they did ended up in the featured version. Without going into any details, I've looked at previous colonizations where someone made substantial edits that weren't used, and I have to take that into account, among other factors. For a specific example, I was very active in the discussion for Transformers and made several suggestions, and even made seven edits to the article. If it gets featured do I think I deserve 1/2 feature credit? No. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  07:03, April 24, 2010 (UTC)
Dude, initially, the rules said that if someone participated in the discussion without even making a single edit, they'd get half a credit. That's what IC is for, and that's what makes it different from ordinary collabs where only 2 or 3 users earn credits. What you're doing is basically scaring colonizers off. Myself, I'm fucking off IC for good if this is the way things are going to be.SIRE FREDDMOOSHA Lord of Egypt AMUSE ME 11:34, April 24, 2010 (UTC)

Because I want discussions involving IC to be on an IC discussion page where they can easily be found by current and future colonizers, I copied the above and responded here. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  05:10, April 25, 2010 (UTC)

Rangeblock for OHMYGODANITALIANMAFIAPIZZA vandals[edit]

Below as found at [1] Presented here for historical purposes.

Hi, Saint Olipro. I'm a Vandal Commander from your's italian sister, Nonciclopedia . I'm grateful to you for the rangeUNblock of 79.11.0.0/16, that (today [i've a variable IP]) includes also me.
But there's some other work to do... Here you'll find all the other crazy IP vandal to unblock.
I don't know and i don't care why Hinoa made that blocks (perhaps was deaddrunk?), but i know that some weapons are dangerous in wimp's hands.
Thanks of all. ---Zaza- 12:12, 27 July 2008 (UTC)

Got them. Edit away! Feels quite good to have unblocked 5.5 million IP addresses :) Spang talk 14:23, 27 Jul 2008
Spy Faggot :( -- Prof Olipro Icons-flag-gb.png KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 12:28, 28 July 2008 (UTC)

da da da da, da da da da, Bat-Man!!![edit]

A little bird told me you were going on vacation, enjoy it and have lots of fun and sun! A question before you go, on the old Batman pre-colony page, how do we go about putting the article back. I don't know where it is, or how to do that. Thanks, and only pay for two whores a day, keeping the evenings free. Al des chains 16:45 26 4 MMX

Frankly, I wouldn't have copied Batman to Bruce Wayne and made Batman a redirect if the pre-colonized Batman would still be up. The primary purpose of IC is to find a less-than-adequate article (i.e., it sucks) that's likely to get a lot of visits and make it into something good so visitors don't think Uncyclopedia sucks. We did that. Putting the sucky version of Batman back would defeat the purpose of IC. Thanks for the happy vacation wish. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  18:06, April 26, 2010 (UTC)

Question thingy[edit]

I'm on IRC if you want to ask me anything. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 17:35, 26 April 2010

Unfortunately, I got there a few minutes after you posted this, and you had already left. However, I was able to get the help I needed from someone else. I'm getting ready to be on vacation for a week, so take care! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  19:55, April 26, 2010 (UTC)
Oh. Yeah, sorry about that. I wasn't planning to be out for that long. If there's still something you want to ask, feel free to do so. And good luck with that vacation. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 00:45, 27 April 2010
Something else I want to ask? Hmm. Say, Socky, would you like some candy? I have some hidden somewhere in my pants. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  01:12, April 27, 2010 (UTC)
Candy? Nah, I'm good. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 03:53, 27 April 2010

For your psychoanalysis of Batman Bruce Wayne[edit]

Please accept this 1/2 Feature Credit.
Due to your insightful psychoanalysis, Bruce Wayne will now be kept secure and safe in the Elizabeth Arkham Asylum for the Criminally Insane. Gotham City hates thanks you..

Why do I need to provide this?, Uncyclopedian Priest and Buccaneer Admiral of Uncyclopedia Imperial Colonization Project IC Buccaneer Admiral WHY??? (stratagems)  21:07, April 26, 2010 (UTC)

Yes, I awarded myself a 1/2 feature credit. Every colonizer I discussed this with agreed to that. But if even a single colonizer disagrees, I (or someone else if it happens while I'm on vacation) will readily put it up for decision by colonizers and will go by whatever they decide. I would not choose 1/2 feature credit at the cost of losing whatever credibilty I may have here. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  21:13, April 26, 2010 (UTC)

What the hell are you talking about???? You wrote most of the page, guided the rest of us along like a shepard, protected the page from the likes of me when I roamed too far from the herd, and guided the project along to a successful conclusion. Have you been drinking in anticipation of your vacation? Anyway, have fun this week. Al sans chains 21:21 26 4 MMX
"What the hell are you talking about????"--you're right; I don't have any credibility to lose. :-D And thanks! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  21:23, April 26, 2010 (UTC)

Distribution of stuff[edit]

Hey. How have you been going with the distribution of stuff for IC? I was going to throw Uncyclopedia:Imperial Colonization/Voting May 2010 around today but given the horrible PC I'm on at the moment I'm holding out until I can get access to my home PC. Have you got a distribution list set up at all? PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 05:19, Apr 27 2010 UTC

I assume you got my answer a while back. Just catching up after my so-called vacation. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  21:32, May 5, 2010 (UTC)

Drake[edit]

Just taking a look at the review, which is excellent as always. Thanks.

BTW, Plymouth Ho is the area of Devon Seafront where Drake is said to have played bowls - in fact, there's still a bowling green there. But I suspect that only British, History geeks who've lived in the area would know that. --Sog1970 07:28, April 27, 2010 (UTC)

Or, sadly, me. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 07:34, Apr 27 2010 UTC
Think I've addressed most of your concerns. Changed a picture and caption or two. I left the pearl necklace reference in, it's a crude sexual innuendo - but those are the best sort.--Sog1970 13:25, April 29, 2010 (UTC)


Oh, yeah. And how do you link to a wikipedia article? I know I've done it before, but I can't recall how. --Sog1970 13:47, April 30, 2010 (UTC)
Oh, well then Plymouth Ho is cool. As for the wiki thing, [[wikipedia:Why]] would give wikipedia:Why. If you want it to just say "Why," then [[wikipedia:Why|Why]] > would give Why. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  21:39, May 5, 2010 (UTC)


Done. Also linked to the very informative wikipedia article on the meaning of "Pearl necklace". Then I got bored and nommed myself. --Sog1970 13:24, May 6, 2010 (UTC)

Vacation?[edit]

Why didn't you ask Mommy before you left for vacation? I'll miss you. :(

Also in Talk:Discordianism the Imperial Colonization section starts twice? Mommys notice these things. :) Have fun on vacation! Dame Pleb Com. <font="Times New Roman">Miley <font="Times New Roman">Spears (talk) 00:58, April 28, 2010 (UTC)

No fair, I'm supposed to notice those things! --Sir ~HELPME~ Count! Awards! Pee! Help! 01:29, April 28, 2010 (UTC)
Maybe u could fix it while Whyner's gone? Dame Pleb Com. <font="Times New Roman">Miley <font="Times New Roman">Spears (talk) 01:36, April 28, 2010 (UTC)
Meh, I like pointing mistakes out to people and then making them fix things themselves. Muahahaha.--Sir ~HELPME~ Count! Awards! Pee! Help! 01:38, April 28, 2010 (UTC)

Vote now for Colonisation[edit]

Hello ladies, gentlemen, and other,

As you may be aware we have now reached the point where April's Colonisation, Discordianism, has been successfully moved to mainspace, and we are currently voting on our colonisation for May.

As I have been press-ganged encouraged strongly to take the reigns of IC, I'm sending this out to remind all current and previous members of IC to vote on next months colonisation. Voting is taking place here as we speak. As of 1st of May I will be announcing the page that will get our tender mercies, so I encourage you to vote - or nominate - now.

Good luck, and may the farce be with you!

PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 03:35, Apr 27 2010 UTC

Addendum
Discordianism has been added to VFH. Go, read, enjoy, vote. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 09:45, Apr 28 2010 UTC

Thanks for your support[edit]

ArkhamBatman.jpg Arkham Asylum thanks you for your generous support. Because of donations from dedicated Gotham City citizens like you, we can afford to keep
Bruce Wayne
safe from himself for another six months.
He was also chosen as our
Featured inmate patient
for April 24, 2010!

PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 09:51, Apr 28 2010 UTC

Hey, Uncy addict, go on vacation and stay on vacation. Look up the definition of the word! (hope you're enjoying it!)[edit]

What the headline said. Al needs another vacation 21:30 29 4

UnSignpost 1 May[edit]

Brought to you by fucking magic. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY 11:58, 1 May 2010

USS April collab[edit]


Thanks for all the hard work last month! -- Sir SF13 (Talk) Upsilon Sigma Sigma's last completed collaboration GUN WotM RotM FBotM VFH SK Maj. ΥΣΣ 22:05 EST 1 May, 2010

Thanks, but I only did one movie. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  21:41, May 5, 2010 (UTC)

Thanks![edit]

The time's they are 'changin'[edit]

I was gone on vacation for a little over a week, and a whole lot seems to have changed.

  1. A Wizard Did It got featured. I've seen articles that were much longer than this fail VFH because they were too short. Maybe it got featured because it was an inside joke.
  2. People used to be against inside jokes getting featured, and they would fail VFH. Now it seems people want inside jokes.
  3. More first-person articles became features of the month than encyclopedic articles. Now it appears people are against first-person articles.
  4. "Watching" is now "following." But it still says "my watchlist" instead of "my followlist," which could confuse new users (actually, it confused me).
  5. I tried starting a new page, and Uncyclopedia wouldn't let me. I tried again with a different page, and it still wouldn't let me. Has the procedure changed, or have I been blocked from starting new pages?
  6. ADDITION: I just noticed it now lists pages I'm following on my user page. I never tried to put that there and do not want that there, but apparently it's now the default unless you shut it off. Can it be changed so that will not show unless we chose to have it show? I don't particularly need the world to know what I'm looking at, and believe I should be able to make that decision for myself.
  7. ANOTHER ADDITION: It's almost impossible to sign in using Internet Explorer. I tried Firefox and it took me three tries before I could log in.

Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  23:00, May 5, 2010 (UTC)

  1. Yes.
  2. Yes.
  3. Yes.
  4. Yes.
  5. Yes.

Pelozurian (talk) 23:05, 5 May 2010 (UTC)

  1. No, it was featured because it can fly.--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN Candidate NOTM USS Pees Stain ) 01:41, May 6, 2010 (UTC)
I remember this Why? guy. He was here before the change. Is he still allowed to edit here? All Hail A Wizard Did it. All Hail this wonderful page. Al UnChained 1:54 6 5 MMX p.s. But his old and former user has a point, I found a big list of articles I supposedly am following but which I'm not on the bottom of my talk page, then tried to edit it out, but couldn't. WTF? That could overload my entire watch list (I use recent changes from the user page as my list), it looks like it lists every article I edit. WTF???
Okay - as far as I can tell this does not reflect your watchlist, but rather reflects what you have edited as part of Special:Contributions. That information is something that everyone has access to, and unless you start creating sockpuppets will remain public information. The only problem is that the information is generally not accessed as it's not as prominantly displayed. Having said that, Sannse has said something recently about a change that's about to be made to talk pages to make them more effective. These two things may be linked, but that's pure speculation, and Sannse hasn't offered any more information than that. To hide the information can be done quickly by clicking hide on your userpage, or changed in your preferences. It also won't show any more detail than the page name, so you can't see when it was last updated by the user or by another party. In short, it's nothing that we didn't have access to before, it takes very little effort to remove it, and it serves no real purpose, so as far as I can see it's not worth worrying about. (Not that I'm stopping you from worrying, just letting you know that I'm not worried.) PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 01:54, May 11 2010 UTC
According to what I've read in the page Mordillo told me is the best place to make comments on this (here), the problem is that your watchlist is displayed--and that the default is ON instead of OFF. I was gone for a week, so it was displayed without my say so. They have at least changed "following" back to "watching," which I suggested (OK, I wasn't the only one). The login still doesn't look like a login, though--I wonder how many new people we're losing because of that. (Several oldtimers, such as me, got lost trying to figure that out). Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  02:01, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
Yeah - There's been significant chat on Forum:What the hell is this new login screen relating to that. From what I can see it's a known issue and it's in the process of getting fixed. I doubt we'd have lost many users, if any, as a result of this. As far as I can see most regular users have worked around it (although I haven't heard from Miley for a few days) and IPs aren't affected. The main impact will be on n00bs, and it will be affecting them until it's working effectively again. But process changes always cause issues - the problem as far as I can see is that it has been put in place without a rollback plan, or at least the rollback hasn't been used. That is sloppy project management. I understand the need for change, but I also understand the need for monitoring change to ensure success. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 02:20, May 11 2010 UTC
AiC actually made a new user name because he couldn't log in. I agree about the sloppy management--whenever you make a change that is that far reaching you should be monitoring it very closely at first, and then rolling back right away if it doesn't work. And the noob thing is a real issue--if a noob has a problem getting in, they likely simply won't come back. And I just saw I'm judging the Noob category for PLS, and that could cut down on entries.
So far every time I've seen them making changes on Wikia, it messed things up. Maybe they should hire someone like you. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  02:25, May 11, 2010 (UTC)
I also created a sockpuppet as a result of this, but worked around it fairly fast. Actually, I should rephrase the need for change to inevitability of change. And given the profitability of Uncyc (ie, negative) I don't think that they could afford my services. That was yet another diuscussion I had with Sannse that you might be interested in. Also feeds back to The truth about coca-cola. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 02:38, May 11 2010 UTC

TEST TEST LOL[edit]

So did you want to discuss discordianism here or on its talkpage? —Pelozurian (talk) 23:07, 10 May 2010 (UTC)

Yeah, I didn't say, did I? I guess its talk page. Thanks for asking! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  23:12, May 10, 2010 (UTC)

RE: Missing judge?[edit]

I've personally e-mailed Tompkins and asked him to judge (it's a bit of a tradition) and he has agreed to do so. We both live in Iowa, so if he abdicates his responsibility, I'll be paying him a visit. -- [sire] EMC [TALK] 04:31 May 17 2010

That's how I roll. Whoever I am. -- [sire] EMC [TALK] 04:39 May 17 2010
Yeah. That's also the same day BENSON graced Uncyclopedia with his presence. Good things come in twos. And I'm a Gemini. I'm sure this is all conspiracy. -- [sire] EMC [TALK] 04:54 May 17 2010

Just thought I'd answer a question for you...[edit]

"pose eh sieves" means "possessives".--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN Candidate NOTM USS Pees Stain ) On Tuesday, 04:37, May 18 2010 UTC

Thanks. I see that, now, but I pronounce "sieves" as "seevz" and the "sives" part of "possessives" as "sihvz" which is probably what threw me. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  04:41, May 18, 2010 (UTC)
And in case you missed it, Uncyclopedia talk:Pee Review/Spellcheck. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 07:01, May 19 2010 UTC
Posted comments there--thanks. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  07:03, May 19, 2010 (UTC)

A ban, and thanks[edit]

If I could ban you for a day I would! I really would! And I would drink and celebrate and laugh all day with my friends. Then I would dream sweet dreams that night, and wake up next to Little Mermaid with a smile on my face, all set to ban you again.

Oh, by the way, thanks very much for the vote on Sandstorm. Appreciated. I know the page blows, but hey, what can you do? (seriously, what can you do?) It was a fun page to write and illustrate, and I enjoyed adding the Lillian Gish clip to the bottom. See you in the Sci-fi aisle. . .Al des chains 16:27 21 5 mmx

PLS judging[edit]

I'm sending you this because you are signed up to judge the Poo Lit Surprise. If you no longer want to judge or are incapable of doing so, please tell me as soon as possible. If you're still good to go then here are the instructions:

First, read all of the articles in your specified category. Second, judge them. Judge how you like, as long as it's at least fair and based on merit (one suggestion would be to use the Pee Review format). Post your top 5 articles here. Hit me up on my talk page for questions, comments, if these rules are not cognizant within you, or of you don't know what the word "cognizant" means.

Thank you again for your valued participation in the balletic train wreck that is the Poo Lit Surprise! -- [sire] EMC [TALK] 12:55 May 24 2010

Sci fi[edit]

Hi, saw your last note at Sci-fi. Please, at least in my opinion, feel free to edit the page, I value your edits and some of the sections sure need it. We can always revert if you touch anyone's sacred spots, but the two edits that will be left will improve the page to that degree. Have at it, imnho, because even though it's on pee review, who cares. Al des chains 19:31 24 5 mmx

Thanks. But I just signed up to do the Pee Review, if that's OK with everybody. See my note there and let me know there what you think. If nobody in IC has a problem with it, I can make my suggestions that way. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  19:42, May 24, 2010 (UTC)
See Puppy's talk page. I say it's IC's decision.--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN Candidate NOTM USS Pees Stain ) On Monday, 08:04, May 24 2010 UTC

RE: Noob entry[edit]

Just disregard the noob edit. It could have very well been that user, but they forgot to log in (I do it a lot, and I could imagine any noob doing it). I'll assume good faith on this one and let it pass. -- [sire] EMC [TALK] 21:17 May 24 2010

Disregard this, the we suck cocks.[edit]

Hi! Thanks for my noob welcome, a poopypoopypoopy head I be, Aye!. Will try not to be too painful to everyone (or get savaged, or my head shot off) whilst stumbling blindly around (but I guess it can't be avoided, really). Can you tell me how I do the underscored sub-heading when I leave a message on a talk page please? please? please? It will look more like I know wtf I'm doing. Yes, yes, I have so much to learn..... so many, many, questions to ask.......... --Ohnogodnotagain 07:49, May 31, 2010 (UTC)
Hi there, Ohnogodnotagain! You probably recognize me as the person you questioned earlier. Anyways, if you want to make a header on a page, put two equal signs on one side of what you want the header to say, and two equal signs on the other. If you click 'edit' on someone's talk page, you can see examples of this. If you have any questions, let me know. Love, User:Ethine/sig

Making subheaders[edit]

Ethine showed you how to make underscored headers by using ==Your title== or by using the edit tag on pages that have an edit tag. In case you want to know how to make sub-headers under that, you simply add more =.

For example, what I did above was ===Making subheaders===

Making sub-subheaders[edit]

For another example, what I did above was ====Making sub-subheaders====

Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  22:20, May 31, 2010 (UTC)

Ethine - Superstar.[edit]

I regain the will to live. Noobie Noobie Grateful Thanks, Ethine x
I'm really glad I did whatever I did to help. By the way, what did I do? Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  22:24, May 31, 2010 (UTC)
Oh, sorry. Your comment wasn't signed and I thought it was from Ethine. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  22:45, May 31, 2010 (UTC)

Help a Noob[edit]

You helped me!! God knows, I'm gonna need it. --Ohnogodnotagain 22:37, May 31, 2010 (UTC)

Help a Noob a bit more, please[edit]

I just uploaded (first try) a giant picture of a tea pot into 'File' but now I can't find 'File'. I don't know where it is. Or the tea pot. Any ideas, please?--Ohnogodnotagain 22:37, May 31, 2010 (UTC)

When you're logged in, at the top of your screen on the right side you should see "My contributions." Click on that link and you will see links to all your contributions listed in chronological order (the default is most recent first). Also I think your image is here. If you want this image on a page and want it centered, do this:
<center>
[[File:Snowhite coffee.jpg]]
</center>
You may notice, though, that as the picture is very large, it will appear, well, very large. If you want it smaller, you can either upload a smaller version, or use a command to make it smaller. I'll post a command that shows how to do that in a second.
Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  22:50, May 31, 2010 (UTC)

Another way to do images[edit]

I'm doing the rather odd thing of signing this above instead of below to make the image coding more visible. Also the way I can write what code you can use without activating it is a little trick you don't really need to know now. If you're curious, just click edit and you can see what I did. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  23:09, May 31, 2010 (UTC)

There are several variations on doing images. For example,

[[Image:Snowhite coffee.jpg|left|170px]]

would give you

Snowhite coffee.jpg

















Still another way[edit]

[[Image:Snowhite coffee.jpg|thumb|right|325px|Snow White coffee. The only blend brewed from real dwarfs.]]
would give you:
Snow White coffee. The only blend brewed from real dwarfs.

And another resource[edit]

User:PuppyOnTheRadio/HowTo:Upload a File has a lot of straight forward stuff on uploading a file and sticking it on a page. Also suggest look at the code people have used and steal it. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 03:00, Jun 1 2010 UTC


Okay, leaving out the ick factor for a second, make sure that when you amend a talk page you add your comments to the base of the section that you are editing, or if creating a new section at the base of a page. Also it is suggested that you use a second level header (ie 2 = signs) when creaqting a new section. And now back to the ick factor. Ick. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 07:38, Jun 1 2010 UTC

Is this a second level header?[edit]

Sorry about the ick outburst. I'll go experiment with headers and uploads in my space and not poop in yours. Thank yooooooooo!!!--Ohnogodnotagain 07:44, June 1, 2010 (UTC)

Actually, this is Why?'s space, not mine. And don't be sorry - just points of courtesy rather than hard and fast rules, but better to know them now then have someone get their back up about them. And yes, that's a second level header. If you need anything between about 0:00 and 8:00 UTC I'm often around during the week, so feel free to drop me a line at User talk:PuppyOnTheRadio. PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Tuesday, 07:53, Jun 1 2010 UTC

Don't worry about me[edit]

I don't get bothered by this sort of thing at all. But some users might, I suppose. Of course maybe they need to get a life. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  01:35, June 2, 2010 (UTC)

I wasn't worried about you. (Actually, I get a little pernickety about adding comments to the bottom of talkpages, and the coding thing is not an issue, but just makes for better formatted articles in the long run. Better to get into good habits sooner rather than later.) PuppyOnTheRadio sig.gif                                                  Wednesday, 01:49, Jun 2 2010 UTC
Good point. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  02:03, June 2, 2010 (UTC)

Put your son's quote here, too![edit]

“Why is ghey lolz0rz”

~ HELPME on Why?

--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN Candidate NOTM USS Pees Stain ) On Friday, 08:53, June 04 2010 UTC

For Valiant Service[edit]

Gosh, this is the swellest award Ive gotten all week! Gee, thank's! Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  01:32, June 7, 2010 (UTC)

Promotion to Commodore[edit]


Whereas you have helped with five (5) Imperial Colonizations that successfully subdued the wild natives, therefore be your elevation proclaimed. (And yes, I have been given authority to promote myself. I already have a higher position, so outrank myself. It can get a little confusing). To the Glory of Her Majesty! Why do I need to provide this?, Uncyclopedian Priest and Buccaneer Admiral of Uncyclopedia Imperial Colonization Project IC Buccaneer Admiral WHY??? (stratagems)  19:11, June 9, 2010 (UTC)

Sir?!? Excuse me sir???[edit]

7079-main.jpg Are you enjoying the flight? Can I get you anything? Fluff your pillow? Cook your taco? Adjust your seating, airflow, overhead light or oxygen? Ok then, I salute you!  Happytimes are here!* http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/9/94/Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  12 Jun 2010 ~ 05:08 (UTC)

Thanks for the notice. As I told our fearless leader before I signed up for USS, I likely wouldn't be able to do much if anything on articles. I was told that it was OK if my main contributions were doing Pee Reviews and making occasional suggestions, so that's what I'm doing (although I did get credit for writing a small section of one article). Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  18:04, June 12, 2010 (UTC)
No problem I was mainly just letting peoples know there was a new thing.  Happytimes are here!* http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/9/94/Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  19 Jun 2010 ~ 18:02 (UTC)

This[edit]

Less of it please. How are you incidentally? You aren't leaving indecent comments on my talk page nearly enough these days. --ChiefjusticeDS 08:19, June 16, 2010 (UTC)

I posted a response on your talk page. I am very sorry about that. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  17:50, June 19, 2010 (UTC)

WHY[edit]

GET BACK HERE YOU DIRTY STINKING N00B —Pelozurian (talk) 09:08, 17 June 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for the sweet talk. See my note at top. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  18:03, June 19, 2010 (UTC)
Now we have to scroll AND read stuff??? why do you always have to be so difficult? (Good luck with the book project.)  Happytimes are here!* http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/9/94/Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  19 Jun 2010 ~ 18:06 (UTC)
Thanks. And good luck with IC. Check the The Big Board. Rabbi Why do I need to provide this?, humble goylem rabbi of the Temple of Narishkayt and rector of The University of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Rabbi WHY??? (shmuesn)  18:09, June 19, 2010 (UTC)
Cool, thanks!  Happytimes are here!* http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/uncyclopedia/images/9/94/Happytimes.gif (talk) (stalk) Π   ~  19 Jun 2010 ~ 19:22 (UTC)
What's a book? I thought everything you could ever read was on Uncyclopedia. —Pelozurian (talk) 23:47, 19 June 2010 (UTC)