Uttoxeter Heritage Centre

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Uttoxeter Heritage Centre is in Uttoxeter, which is a few hundred miles from Godalming, England.

Why should you bother to go there?[edit]

The answer is simple: because you should. I mean, everyone wants to learn about Medieval table manners, don't they? And also, it's located in a very nice building. However, this particular very nice building also happens to be a very nice building, which in turn is a very nice building.

Definition of "very nice building"[edit]

A very nice building is a very nice building. This is ironic, really, because, it can also mean a very nice building. Another definition is a very nice building. For more information, please see Very nice building.

Is it easy to get to from the local railway station?[edit]

Yes.

Is it easy to get to from the local bus station?[edit]

Yes.

Is it easy to get to from the nearest charity shop?[edit]

Yes.

Is it easy to get to from the local chippy?[edit]

Yes.

Is it easy to get to from the nearest race-course?[edit]

Yes.

Is it easy to get to from the nearest car park?[edit]

Yes.

Is it easy to get to from Godalming?[edit]

No.

Well, then, how do I get there from Godalming?[edit]

  • Go on a train (South West Trains) to London Waterloo.
  • Go on the London Underground (Northern Line) to Euston.
  • Go on the Victoria Line to Kings Cross St Pancras.
  • Walk to St Pancras station.
  • Go on a train (Midland Mainline) to Derby.
  • Go on a train (Central Trains) to Hereford.
  • Realise that you have caught the wrong train.
  • Go on a train (Central Trains) back to Derby.
  • Go on a train (Central Trains) to Uttoxeter.
  • Ask the strange-looking man on platform 1 for directions.
  • Follow his directions.
  • Realise that you have ended up in Moscow.
  • Catch a plane to Heathrow.
  • Go on the London Underground (Piccadilly line) to Kings Cross St Pancras.
  • Go on a train (Midland Mainline) to Derby.
  • Go on a train (Central Trains) to Uttoxeter.
  • Call the strange-looking man on platform 1 (the one who sent you to Moscow) a naughty little boy.
  • Walk into the town centre.
  • Arrive at the heritage centre (at long last).
  • Realise that the heritage centre has closed for the night.
  • Decide that you would rather not waste another night.
  • Return home.

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