VIRON

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Viron prepares to attack a lesser being he finds inferior.

Viron is a strange creature from the Outer rim. He likes to dance with other guys and ninjas and stuff, and he loves it when a guy lets him have the controller for a little bit. Although he doesnt consider himself real, he just says that he is pretending he is real for "the time being." It is open to debate whether he is a god, a bigger god, or simply a demon. To make things simpler, we will call him a god until further notice. He feeds on lamb's blood and the brains of retarded hamsters. Taking the secret identity of Thomas, he lives on some useless island that is run over by GIANT DANCING LOBSTERS. There are currently two known subtypes, CB1 which is expressed mainly in the basal ganglia and the limbic system of the brain, but also in the lungs, liver and kidneys and CB2 which is mainly expressed on T cells of the immune system and in hematopoietic cells. Mounting evidence suggests that there are novel vironoid receptors, that is, non-CB1 and non-CB2, which are expressed in endothelial and CNS.

History[edit]

Viron spawned at the big bang along with Osama bin Laden, Saddam, Hitler, and the log. As the universal dust particles settled, he sat at a round table in Camelot until a puppy appeared about 1.5 million years later. He then proceeded to huffing it. After he was high on puppy fumes, he got in his car and drove to the local 7-11, run by Constantine (the Keanu Reeves one) and Pope Benidict. He then got a purple 64-oz slurpee. Without paying, he walked out of the store. With his amazing kung-fu matrix powers, Constantine quickly apprehended the creature. After paying double, he swore revenge on Keanu.

The mind behind the mayhem[edit]

Viron's amazing burning sheep theory explains that the oil in wool can make people extremely high and result in voices. this explains Moses's affair with the Burning Bush.

Viron is considered by many to be a complete asshole. Because he recently commented on how George Bush doesn't care about space people, this is completely untrue.

Viron has donated -$600 million to "needy children in Ethiopia"'s funds. Yes, that's right. He personally stole 400 jars of colllected coins. Damn, he's an asshole.

Viron invented pizza and burgers at the same time, Thus spawning a giant flying spaghetti monster, which promptly devoured Chuck Norris as a baby, which is what gave the Chuck his superhuman powers.

His sworn enemy, the French, have kidnapped Viron's puppy. They shall be smited without mercy.

ABOUT 5 mins ago (from 12:52) VIRON was declared dead. Cause: his stomach exploded from taking a form of blame.

Currenly, VIRON is un-dead and still at large. LOCK YOUR DOORS FOR THE LOVE OF VIRON!!!!!

He saved private Ryan.

Viron is expanding it's active forces, now numbering about 95,000, with an additional reserve of 575,000, as well as a "reserve of the reserve" of 1,314,955. The Vironi ground forces have in addition 15,000 airborne dropping troops. In the training of its troops, Viron has signed many contracts to strengthen its armed forces and to train its military with a Turkey. Viron has also taken a new organisation style to modernize its army organisation.

Viron's confrontation with Oprah[edit]

When the flaming ninjas of GALENLAND attacked, he ttly PWND their asses. After he looted their corpses, he saw a cow. A cow eating a baby. "Oh my god. it's Oprah.", he exclaimed as Oprah started hitting him with Doctor Phil. Shaken, he called Oprah a fatass. Oprah's rage caused her to explode into a giant statue of a giant robotic chicken named Justina.

If you wish to see a video of Viron's battle against Oprah, watch the third Lord of the Rings movie, but replace all the orcs with mini-Oprahs and replace all the good guys with Viron. Replace the One Ring with a mini Oprah doll, and replace Sauron with the original Oprah. Lastly, replace the Wringwraiths with Doctor Phil, and the Eagles with Nikko.

The weapons of the Viron[edit]

Viron uses many weapons, but his most notable title is "Shotgun Whore". He uses many unfair shotguns from many different places; the shotgun from Call of Doodie 2, Gaylo 1 and 2, and the auto-shottie from Countersrike. This obsession with noob cannons renders him virtually invincible. He is also noted in the use of eye beams.

Since the grant towards the giant frenchie cannon, he now owns that shit. Run for your virginity.

The Nature of the great God[edit]

Viron is the human overlord assigned to the Scrotum, the Brains, and the Nostrils. He created all of these appendages in his own image, and if anyone but the Vatican gets e-mails regarding this in ANY way, we will find the computer that sent it and put petroleum jelly,(which, he too is the god of) all over the monitor. you have been warned. Llamas, sloths, armadillos, and turtles have all been part of his projects, but he denies any involvment in the turtle, because they are cute. A complete list of things he took part in creating will be available at the bottom of the page once the professional researchers in Iowa tell us what those things are.

Viron is also edible and, according to Jesus, quite delicious. See Last Supper.

The List we have all been waiting for for months.[edit]

  • Olympic race
  • Llamas
  • Sparkling
  • Sloths
  • PyRo_X
  • Armadillos
  • A book of matches
  • Next week
  • A lot of money
  • Witches' brew