Vladimir VI the Lenin

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“Ghe speeking wid Roossian akshent, da?”

~ Oscar Wilde on The author of this article

Vladimir VI the Lenin was a Russian Czar, throwed over old dynasty, renamed Russian Empire to Soviet Empire and covered national feelings with international solidarity of proletariat to get more support in neighbouring country's. While doing it, Czar Vladimir VI was very self-forgetful and his health problems (and lack of sexual ability) resulted in enthronement of next dynasty in person of (Red) Czar Joseph I the Stalin. His supposed descendant presently rules modern Russia as Czar Vladimir VII the Putin.

Lenin's mistress was Inessa Armand, who was actually Julia Ormond and had traveled back in time with him to seize power. His other mistress was the Danish actress Connie Nielsen, the bastard daughter of Willie Nelson, a Danish prince turned country singer. She also traveled back in time because John Kerry did better as a redhead and she realized that redheads appealed to Lenin, who himself had dyed his remaining hair red. Lenin was in fact John Lennon, who time-traveled back and forth in time to avoid assassination by Mark David Chapman, a devotee of Kali, Hindu Goddess of Death. He Russified his name to Lenin and made himself Czar of Russia, so he could conquer the world and get more redheaded women. He chose Red as the Russian flag's new color, as a symbol of his love of redheads.