War and Peace

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War and Peace is a children's story of Russian history and society by Doctor Seuss, first published in 1954. It was organized in verses of flowing prose, reflecting the beauty of the Russian society. It is also over 1,500 pages long.

Some samples of this Russian man's Iliad are shown below.


Now, the Russians of Russia all hated their Tsars,

Though they patted their bellies with money from thars,

Those Tsars were not rich,

Their power was small,

You'd think such a thing wouldn't matter at all.

But because they bribed Tsars,

(The rich Ruski'ud brag),

"We're the best Ruski in Tuski, you Rich Royal Slag!"

Corruption was rampant,

Things had to be done,

And in came the Lenin in Denim. Not fun.


Now, Russia was busy,

In great World War I,

For they were bogged down,

While fighting the Huns.

The people were dying, and dying in droves,

Perhaps the Tsar cared? Nope- 'Twas prancing in robes!

Our Tsar didn't care about Russians or wars-

He seemed quite content as a man with fat whores!

Rasputin kept Russia in the midst of the worst,

Until all at once our pal Lenin in burst!

He slaughtered the Tsar! He spat on his robes!

He toasted his eyes and roasted his earlobes,

And on that dull day he declared a solution,

Pulling up his jeans for an ol' revolution!

Post WWII[edit]

I will not eat a British lamb,

I will not eat them, Uncle Sam.

I do not like your wealthy heirs,

I do not like them anywhere.

I do not like free press or vote.

I would not, could not, with a goat.

I make these countries go with me,

I must do this-

for liberty!

I sure would like an Iron Fist,

But I could not be Capitalist!

I will not let supplies in here-

Berlin must fall, you won't get near.

I'll starve them out with a blockade,

I'll starve them out, and hold parades.

What is this thing that I do see,

A squad of planes coming towards me?

An airlift, this I did not see,

Its a veritable catastrophe.

You may have saved Berlin this time,

but just you wait for our war crimes!

I'll build a wall,

And one not small,

A wall that's big and will not fall!

With such a thing, what could go wrong?

Nothing, nothing,

Nothing at all!