William Gary Busey

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William Octobazooka "Gary" Busey (born June 19- August 12, 1944) is an American Film Actress, train enthusiast and Commanche Indian historian who came to the attention of the media in 1988, when he received permanent brain damage on the set of Predator 2 by deliberately driving his motorcycle into a die-cast replica of Predator, mistaking it for Predator.

Early Life[edit]


Essentially nothing is known about Busey's childhood. Busey himself has publicly denounced children, bitterly calling them "veiny sacks of meat and poop". He later remarked that he felt like "A pigeon in a train". Through the analysis of Busey's incoherent mumbling, scientists have concluded that until the age of 19, he was covered in a thick membrane similar to a human placenta. It is widely believed that while still protected by this outer shell, Busey appeared several times larger than he actually is. Experts on the subject speculate that this was a defense mechanism to scare off predators, and also explains the strange phenomenon known simply as "Nick Nolte". While Nick Nolte led a strange, subhuman life on the outside, a developing Gary Busey lurked inside: Watching, waiting, learning. Gary Busey was learning how to live.

The exact time when Busey and his placenta parted ways is, like so much of his life, unknown. 19529.jpg

Acting Career[edit]


Gary Busey has played a major or minor role in 70% of all Hollywood films from 1989 to 1998. Producers have even made it tradition to subtly slip Gary Busey into into all of their major productions. In fact, The American Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences (AAMPAS) actually sanctioned an Academy Award for the Best Use of Gary Busey in a Feature-Length Film. To ensure the integrity of the filmmakers' endocrine systems, however, the award is given at a private, non-televised event and Busey himself is never told of its existence. I only disclose the preceding information on this website knowing that Gary Busey does not believe in the internet. [