|Fire Danger: CATASTROPHIC (delete)
Wormholes are particularly perilous to the average space explorer because they are very dark, as the last explorer to venture into them (Captain Stephen Hawking) stupidly forgot to leave the light on for everyone else. They can also cause meltdowns in fusion kittens; to prevent a meltdown, be sure to use de-wormholing tablets.
There has been some speculation that wormholes could be used to to facilitate interspace travel. Space worms are known to be attracted to repeated rhythms, so Drs. Ed and Tom Chemical of the University of Ibiza has been working on a generator for something they call "Block Rocking Beats".
The Light at the Other End?
As of today, no one knows exactly where it is that wormholes lead, as everyone who has ventured into a wormhole has never come back out again. This has led to much speculation as to where they actually lead.
However, the most popular theory to date is that they in fact lead into the ya mum 4chan.
Notable Wormhole events
Other than the research already mentioned above, very little is known about these fascinating stellar anomalies. The Universe has been known to spontaneously spawn wormholes to relieve pressure on the laws of physics from time to time, but to date, only one such occurrence has been observed near Earth: In 2010, to set anxious shareholders at ease, the corporation opened up a new wormhole in the outer solar system, through which alien invaders conquered Pluto and Charon before establishing permanent settlements and opening up relations with humanity. George Clooney was to blame.
The way to make a wormhole
- 1) Call Hawking on his phone.
- 2) Order One Wormhole hold the onions
- 3) Wait three minutes.
- 4) It will arrive at your house.
- 5) Stephen Hawking will ride in on his Wheel Chair.
- 6) He will hand you Wormhole.
- 7) Force you to join his club.
- 8) A message box will appear in front of him that will say "You have just received a wormhole from Stephen Hawking."
- 9) He'll tell you to press OK button.
- 10) Next you'll get a warning like "You are about to mess with the space time continuum. Do you accept all outcomes?"
- 11) Accept.
- 12) You now have a wormhole.
or you an use form ii - jo-jin-jitsuko:
- Just learn the following theory:
- the learn how to use the worm side
Worms are tiny wee bastards that live in Earth and eat hair left by their human counterparts. What they lack in size, they make up for one gigantic orifice which most animals don't have. The "Wormhole" is such a huge part of the worm's body that it has to be flung into space, probably by god or some other unknown dark horse. So every time you enter a wormhole, remember, you're entering the largest part of a misdgetised being.