ZADR

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Irken Approved This page has officially been approved by Emperor Zim. Now shut up your noise tube and read the article, filthy human pig-monster!

“ZADR? I fucking hate that guy... wait...”

~ Oscar Wilde

“Why would you draw that?!”

~ Invader Larb on ZADR

“I'm going to throw-up! *vomits*”

~ Tallest Purple on ZADR

“MY EYE!”

~ Tallest Red on ZADR

Founded in 1492, ZADR, aka Zim and Dib Romance, is an overrated slash pairing for the fandom of the television show "Invader Zim," that little fangirls had to create to get orgasms. Despite it being despised by the show's creator, Jhonen Vasquez, the fans continue on, pridefully knowing that they disgust the creator and make him ill. Some fans, in fact, actually despise Mr. Vasquez's existance. They are oblivious to the fact that this contradicts their obsession. They are also oblivious to the fact that "Invader Zim" was a television show specifically created at the behest of paranormal investigator Dib, to expose the plotting alien Zim as a treacherous mastermind bent on ruling the Earth (which he now does, so it was a failure, but eh). Apparently the actual premises of TV shows do not matter, in the face of lol hawt boismex.

Contents 1 The Origin 2 The Explanations 3 Fan Art 4 Fan Fictions 5 Reactions 5.1 Other Reactions, Rumors, and Trivia 5.2 What People/Aliens have to say about ZADR 6 The Game 7 Suicidal 8 See Also

[edit] The Origin

In the original Nickelodeon television show that was cancelled some years ago when Nickelodeon decided that fake pre-teen angst and poser shows were more appropriate (the company "decided" this at the behest of Zim's evil robot creation, Herb Scannel), the two main characters, Zim and Dib, were always known to be rivals. This stands to reason, given the reason for the show, and given that Dib had sworn in real life to stop Zim at all costs. It also makes logical sense, because Zim is an adult Irken with that species' typical revulsion of all non-Irkens, while Dib is a human elementary school student who has issues and may need to be sent to an asylum. They are consistently portrayed as hating one another in episode after episode, for the obvious reason that Dib constantly fucks up Zim's evil plans for taking over the world, and makes him look like a complete dumbass. This is, of course, the entire point.

Despite this, one day, some girl who ran out of yaoi pr0n to masturbate to came up with the fantastic idea of these two rivals falling in love and having hot, gay sex every second of every day. Though no one actually remembers the creator of this Godforsaken couple, since no one ever gave her official credit and there are plenty out there who claim "LOL IT WAS MY IDEA KTHX," it is fairly certain that she was later sent to a mental home, where she remains to this day, carving suggestive ZADR drawings on the jail walls.

[edit] The Explanations

1.) Ohmigawd, see, when people are rivals and totally hate each other, and try to like, kill each other on a weekly basis, that means that they like, soooo secretly love each other, you know? They're just like, hiding it and stuff. And I mean, who doesn't think two sexy men--er, an alien and a little boy--getting it on is hawt? Leik, ohmigaaaaawd, I'm getting all excited just thinking about iiiiit~! <3 <3 <3

2.) I know they hate each other. But that's what makes it so damn sexy. Mmm...angry sex. With whips and chains and probes and things. Who cares if it would never happen because Zim rules the Earth and Dib's in Guam wrangling monkeys? I want my non-con fix, and I want it now!

3.) I just pair up everybody with everybody else because everyone needs love!! Since Zim and Dib appeared in a show together, and it's a show that I like, they should be a pairing! It's so kawaii, too! =^_^= Eee, Dibby and Zimmy are so cuuuute I want to hug them so much! But I can't, so I 'ship them together so they can hug each other! Even though they wouldn't act that way, I don't care! It would be so nice if everyone was nice.

4.) I do it because I CAN. No one is safe. Not even YOUR MOM.

[edit] Fan Art

This sad excuse for a fan-pairing is especially common on the art website DeviantART. The majority of the pictures that result when one conducts a search for "ZADR" on that site are labeled "Mature Content," due to the fact that the couple's only purpose for existing is to be a source of alien-on-human pornography. Also, many offerings are fine examples of the large-eyed, big-ridiculous-haired, anime-style horror that seems to plague many fandoms. This supports the theory that those who advocate ZADR have never actually seen the original Invader Zim series, as it was written as an animated documentary, designed by an American, and had nothing to do with kawaii neko neko wai chibis whatsoever. Of course, since our mighty overlord Zim had all copies of the series destroyed, and the only versions currently available are bootlegs sold by shady dealers, this could be excused. That is, if the fangirls weren't so snotty.

Another hallmark of ZADR "fanart" is to portray either or both characters as extremely girly. A large number of Dib and Zim-related artworks include them kissing, hugging or just blushing in an overly cute, chibi-like fashion. This wouldn't be so bad, but they're often depicted doing these things in frilly dresses, such that even most self-respecting women would not be seen dead in. This has made some theorists wonder if perhaps the fangirls drawing these pictures really aren't into gay male sex as much as they are into lesbians.

One more theme one can find in artwork pertaining to this "couple" is male pregnancy, or "mpreg." Fangirls seem to find it absolutely adorable and cute to portray Dib pregnant with Zim's baby. This despite the dubious biology of such a pregnancy, and without regard to the fact that the baby would be highly unlikely to turn out cute in the end, but would instead probably be a horrible, hideous mutant monster. Nevertheless, when asked how this could ever happen in the first place, how the pregnancy would work, how birth would occur, and how the resulting spawn could possibly end up looking like a perfect mash-up of Zim and Dib's physical characteristics, the average fangirl will simply shriek, "KAWAIIIIII!!!" and run away giggling.

ZADR artwork can be found en masse at its highly popular fanclub on DeviantART. It appears to be organized in a very businesslike and professional way, and is home to a vast array of works portraying Zim raping Dib, and Zim and Dib kissing with cute, sparkly, chibi eyes. For fangirls, this spot is not to be missed!

[edit] Fan Fictions

The well-known website FanFiction.Net, created by Chuck Norris, is where a wide variety of ZADR fan fictions are displayed and over-whored.

Interestingly, these "stories" are for the most part identical in plot. A typical cliché involves a suddenly teenaged Dib (who has become tall and sexy) feeling sorry for (an equally--and more inexplicably--tall and sexy) Zim when the latter first discovers that his mission to conquer Earth is a lie and then becomes suicidal. The two forget their past hatred for one-another, befriend each other for about five minutes, and then have sex. They are then "in love" for another fifteen chapters of twenty pages each, three-fourths of which are devoted to graphically-written scenes of the two fucking each other up the ass.

So popular are some of these series of fan fictions, that they are even known on DeviantART, and have had mass amounts of fanart made for them, to the point where many newcomers to the fandom believe that Zim really is that tall, Dib really is that feminine, and there was never really a plot to subvert humanity at all, in the original series. One of the most popular series is BRB Suicide. This incredible (please, look up the word "incredible" in a dictionary sometime) fanfiction features Dib and Zim depicted as impossibly the same age of around sixteen, and as emo kids, despite this being incredibly out of character, even for the iconoclastic Dib. But like anyone cares, since everyone loves hot emo boys kissing.

[edit] Reactions

When contacted at his monkey ranch in Guam for his opinion on ZADR, Dib choked on his dinner of baked beans and nearly died, and then stated that he would in fact rather be eaten by bloodthirsty, rabies-infected cannibals than be Zim's "special friend." He is quoted as saying that his only goal in life was to stop the invading alien before he could gain control of the world, but that, "Idiot fangirls misunderstood my brilliant documentary and failed to see the truth! They beat me with plushies and hailed Zim as their sex god!" After going on at length about his abject failure and subsequent flight from America, and wondering out loud whatever happened to his co-creator Jhonen Vasquez, Dib continued, "This is just more punishment, I guess, for trying to point out the reality of that tyrant. Being written as a whiny, girly emo-boy who gets raped by him."

Actually, he is pretty whiny.

On the other hand, Japan itself has taken notice of the pairing (since the cries of 'KAWAII' can be heard across oceans), and has decided to cash in on its wide popularity. An undisclosed animation house has been contracted to make a movie based on Dib and Emperor Zim's romantic exploits. However, to keep from being slaughtered wholesale by Zim's giant deathmachines, the creators plan to write and draw it as a generic yaoi story in which both the main characters are portrayed as flagrant girly-haired flamers, also known as "bishounen." Because after all, that's really what ZADR is anyway. So long as the two characters are named "Zim" and "Dib," it doesn't matter if their personalities, motives, heights, ages, histories, styles of dress, modes of speaking, and now, in this new movie, their species and basic physical characteristics are changed, does it? Of course not. The Japanese plan to unleash "Kawaii Bondage Emo Neko Super ZADR World!" onto the unsuspecting populace sometime in 2009.

[edit] Other Reactions, Rumors, and Trivia

• The internet police banned the ZADR club, until they bribed some weaker officers with normal porn procured by older members of the cult, and they got their little horror movie of a club back.
• It is rumored that some ZADR fans were also sent to an asylum, but most have secret underground bases to hide from their parents in while they write dreadful alien-on-schoolboy porno, so they are hardly ever caught by the men in the white coats.
• The pairing won the Most Masturbated to Couple Award, as well as the ULTIMATE KAWAII RAPING COUPLE OF THE YEAR AWARD in 2007.
• Mistakenly, the police took this seriously, and actually attempted to arrest Emperor Zim for child molestation. When it was quickly discovered that Zim would rather stab himself in the neck with a large pointy blade then do anything to and/or with the Dib-human (besides rend him limb from limb), he was set free to continue his brutal reign over us all.

[edit] What People/Aliens have to say about ZADR

“ZADR? I fucking hate that guy... wait...”

~ Oscar Wilde

“OMFG LIEK ZIM AND DIB MAEK SUCH A GEWD CUPPL!!!!!!111 HAWT YAOI SMEX PLZ!!”

~ Fangirls on ZADR

“It makes me ill... to my ill prone belly.”

~ Jhonen Vasquez on ZADR

“... Thanks alot, ZADR fans. You ruined the fandom.”

~ average IZ fans on ZADR

“Zim must be like me now! He must like being with the little boys too! He may be an alien adult, but he's not afraid to get jiggy wit' it with the little ones BOW-CHICKA-WOW-WOW!!”

~ Michael Jackson on ZADR

“Oh, god. Michael Jakson saying bow-chicka-wow-wow. I'm going to be sick.”

~ Not Obsessive ZADR Fan on what MJ said

“Huh huh! That's gay!”

~ Fosse on ZADR

“Why would you draw that?!”

~ Invader Larb on ZADR

“That IS creepy! You're creepy Zim!”

~ Tallest Purple on ZADR

“I'm going to throw-up! *vomits*”

~ Tallest Purple on ZADR

“NOT ON THE DOUGHNUTS!”

~ Tallest Red on what Tallest Purple threw-up on

“Oh God, not even I like that”

~ a furry on ZADR

“Dude, like, I wanna write a song about them and their hot boy romance that makes no sense! Totally! It'll be just as punk as Sk8r Boi too!!!”

~ Avril Lavigne on ZADR

“It's pedo-on-kid slash from a kid cartoon.”

~ Captain Obvious on ZADR

“*Clears Throat* Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy...”

~ Random Dude on ZADR

“OMG! LIKE ZADR!!! Let's all help Zim rape Dib! ”

~ Suki (Irken Princess) on ZADR

“LMAO! Funny! ”

~ RHP on SUKI ( IRKEN PRINCESS)

“SICK! ”

~ Dark Jak on SUKI

“Be afraid. Be very afraid.”

~ Horror Movie Buff on ZADR

“These guys are like free to do what they like want!we like won the war like you fuckin like nazi whores!!!”

~ Lyn-Z on freedom of gay alien/boy sex

“WASNT ZIM WITH ME!?”

~ Dwinky on zim

“WTF?”

~ RHF Rufufu or Keroro on this crap

“What they said.”

~ The rest of the Keroro Platoon on Rufufu or Keroro on this crap

“Um...Yeah, I'm all for that 'gay pride' stuff, but this is just...no, just no.”

~ That One Chick on ZADR

“The reason ZADR is a popular gay slash pairing is the only reason i watch Zim”

~ Jimmy Urine's "full of crap" comment about ZADR

[edit] The Game

There is also a brand new video game available for Wii,Playstation 3 and Xbox 360 soon, based off of the fandom of the spectacular and original ZADR.

The game plot is... well, there isn't really much of a plot. Basically, whether selecting Zim or Dib, you have to go around doing anything revolving around gay sex/rape, emo-ism, being as OOC as you possibly can, and much more! The game will probably be rated M, for the fact that little children should not even view this game, as it will damage their brains. Note that the game will provoke children to join the cult fandom.

• 1-2 Players
• Bonus levels for hawt yaoi sex bonus points
• Many levels and areas to fuck in, including the SKOOL, Dib's house, Zim's house, on the street, etc.
• Dress-up and create your own outfit for either of the two. (But do remember, they only come in emo or drag.)
• Wii with fucking session but only for female players.(Only achievable by hacking or cheating to get "Anti-Gay Mode")

Available at any video game store/Wal-Mart near you, next January.

[edit] Suicidal

To the normal people of the fandom, it is blinding to the eyes and may cause brain 'splosions and vomiting on the keyboard. Be cautioned, as looking at too many ZADR pictures by neofox and co. can traumatize you for life, as well as make you too afraid to turn on your computer ever again.

Some people, the ones who go crazy from the torture, commit suicide. Then again, there are also some fans in general whom try to kill themselves, as well, as their own way of being a martyr. (Note that ZADR is like a religion to them, and they treat Zim like Jesus Christ (Which he is.) and Dib like Jesus' ho's.(Namely Judas.))

Though you cannot blame the poor souls that kill themselves, due to having trouble bearing through the horrid coupling. (Though there are worse... such as DADR. That stands for Dib and Dwicky Romance.) Some fanart is so disturbing, it even makes brains of the average deviantART member explode. True story.

Nonetheless, it's important to try your best to stay calm and sane while viewing ZADR pictures. It's best suggested, if you are prone to this, to never type in 'ZADR' on the Search feature. If you come upon it by accident, your suicide is no one's fault except the ZADR fan creatures.

[edit] See Also

• DADR
• NAMBLA
• yaoi
• slash
• Invader Zim
• Zim
• emo
• Michael Jackson
• Avril Lavigne
• penis
• rape
• gay
• anal sex
• Jhonen Vasquez
• Angelina Jolie
• alien
• human
• pedophile