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“Beatles mix up with Groucho”

~ Tamia
Commandant in full dress regalia

Jungle is Massive[edit]

Marxism-Leninism is a past-time which despite dwindling popularity is still played regularly in some parts of the world but never Corporate America or the other America United States. It is most notably played in Colombia where players amass in huge jungle gyms the size of rain forests. The game can be played by many people but there has to be two teams or classes. In Colombia it is quite normal that one class is made up of gorillas the other humans. The object of the game is to surround the opposing team and hurl insults until one team negates itself by using what is termed radical subjectivity. This usually involves the liberal use-value of machine guns and other weapons. The opposing team can counter this with foreign economic and military support. The gorillas favoured insults are "Reactionary", "Opportunist" and "Counter-revolutionary". The humans sometimes known as bureacrats like to hurl "You can't blow up a social relationship!" and "Revisionists!!!". However most games end in bloody outcomes, stalemate or protracted conflict which peaks now and then. The government has started to offer subsidies for the players to quit the game long-term. Some seem to be taking up the offer but there is a new younger player on the scene, the silver backed gorrila. They apparently possess new weapons such as dialectical materialism and class consciousness. They especially love to shout "false consciousness!!" at whoever they are playing against. Marxism-Leninism has absolutely everything to do with Carbonated beverages and their relations to marxist and other controversial ideologies in an alternate universe but not this one.


The game is not only played in Colombia, there are what are termed degenerated forms of the past-time in The People's Democratic Gonorrhoea for example. Here the perfect communist government encourages the game and through internationalism would like to exchange some humans for gorillas in an act of solidarity with other keen game players. There are also rumours the game is back in fashion after reports of a similar game being played in India and more recently Nepal. There have been reports that the notoriously shy Western Gorilla may play the game if it increases in popularity world wide. If this were the case there are suspicions the Western Gorilla would be termed a fadist and a supporter of bandwagonism.


Venezuelan Hugo Chavez is said to be a fan of the game. Although the origins of the game are unknown, specialists of origins think its origins are in the Soviet Onion or the Jews or the NWO. Fans of the musical genre Dub-step are usually massive fans of the Colombian version played in da jungle gyms cos they is massive bruv init.

See Also[edit]