2105

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2105, the year of the turnip. It is during this year that the space-time continuum mysteriously, yet completely expectedly, collapsed for exactly 11.5 minutes on Hawkinguary 38. Nobody is exactly sure what happened, because the universe didn't exist at that time, except that it involved penguins and tapioca pudding. Fortunately, other than mass hysteria, anarchy, the destruction of almost every structure over two feet high, and a complete collapse of social order, not to mention vast psychological damage, this had no harmful effects. Since then, time and space have been slightly irregular. However, other than some missing limbs or organs once in a while, and the occasional case of someone being turned inside-out, this has had no negative effect that the few scientists that weren't gnawed to death could prove.

Stuff that happened[edit]

  • Tapioca became illegal
  • Worship of the petrified remains of Oprah begins, starting/continuing the new religion oprahism
  • The Wallet of Endless Pencils(tm) causes 5 more wars
  • Mars blown up, and it's remains used to make Earth even bigger
  • A Super Hobo is created when George Bush implodes after finally being convinced he was wrong about Iraq(this paradox caused a black hole, there were many casualties)
  • Number of planets in the solar system reduced to 4, the number of moons rose to 15 total
  • 153 alleged sightings of Pluto and yet only one alleged sighting of the sun, where did it go?
  • I declare myself immortal, after deciding I don't like being dead
  • 200GHz processor developed, .5 copies sold
  • Value of the dollar drops to .000000000008% of original value, and yet the penny grows to 73/2$
  • The Crimson King turns out to be Bill Gates in a red sweater-vest
  • 126,403 minor cults at last count
  • 126,402 of them having something to do with Stephen King and the abomidable snowuncle
  • Conan the barbarian kills everyone on Earth, including you
  • Conan realizes he's dead, so he Unkills everyone
  • The band "Life is for Losers", composed mostly of corpses of actors reanimated through robot technology, earns its 21st billion $
  • A vast fissure discovered on the formerly underwater continent of Swinesturmia.
  • Biologists develop man-eating giant carrot. It survived long enough to eat the scientists, then died. It was then served in soup.
  • Electronic engineers and programmers succeed in creating artificial intelligence. The machine promptly committed suicide.(after transpecies divorce)
  • The moon, due to a reaction in it's core, imploded. The majority of the population, when asked about this, said "So what?"
  • The population of the world, still experiencing insanity, anarchy, and severe headaches, declares life "a real bummer", then said "where is my toast"?
  • Planet Earth, after reading the above bullet point, commits suicide by diving into the sun
  • New Earth created, composed of a landfill that survived the sun and 5 insane hobos that live there
  • The hobos try to build huts, but end up killing each other in various hilarious but tragic nailgun accidents
  • by this time scientists thought they would have advanced technology so far that they thought cd would not be needed, they were wrong discs are now the size of a dinner plate and bill clinton came up with the copyright name record discs
  • phones became too small so phone powder was its replacement, it was pulled off the shelves when half the population of teenagers died from phone poisoning, it was put back on the market by annoyed parents and policemen
  • it was finnaly admitted that what happened in roswell was some idiot parked his saucer too close to a time portal, but forgot to put it in park
  • star treak enterprise is now on a free channel, only if you look for it
  • cambels chicken noodle soup, and hot pocket company has taken over antarctica, yet to see a profit
  • steven colbear became immortal and enslaved people in 2 square blocks of downtown tokyo
  • mt.rushmore collapsed when bush tried to add his face to it(of corse he wanted his to be biggest.)
  • atlantis was found when michal jackson looked at earth through his personal spy satelite
  • google, eventually out searched yahoo, and therefore changed its name to giggle
  • the simpsons have finally hit their 250000th episode
  • because lobsters now come in many colors including twilight and cardboard red lobster changed its name to lobster
  • at the turn of the century a camera is created so it can take a picture of itself
without a mirror, or a bald guy's head
  • after many tries the hair finally beat the tourtus.
  • do to an outbreak of migraines, scientists have declared the tomatoe a vegetable
  • the rabbit finally got his Trix cereal leaving the kids bankrupt.
  • Michal Jackson imploaded
  • Macdonalds was sued by the A.S.P.C.A after they found out that their delux breakfast platter was found to containd mutant eagle eggs
  • After water became obsolete the government decided to distroy all that contained that liquid
  • the year 2105 seemed too good for other centuries so the gov't decided to make the year 2105 the 40th century instead, all else is non existant.
  • the top pick of the guiness book of world records is the scariest paining in the world, so scary you die from looking at it, wondering how it got there.
  • futurama got filed in the fictional history file.
  • falkland war starts over a dispute of spam.