Animal love

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“What separates us from the animals is the choice of bestiality.”

What Animal Love Is[edit]

Animal love, otherwise known as animal porn is the act of giving sexytime to beings that are:

  • not human
  • not fake
  • not made out of metal

What Animal Love Is Not[edit]

Animal love, otherwise known as animal porn is the act of giving sexytime to beings that aren't:

  • human
  • fake
  • made out of metal

Popular Opinion[edit]

Animal love is taboo in most cultures and not to be practiced for any end whatsoever, especially not with a kitten.

The animals cannot talk, but a 1999 study at the University of Somewhere showed that dogs, sheep, eagles, those snake dudes from Chrono Trigger, and alligators who had been copulated with displayed greater levels of aggression in the following three months than those who had not. Oddly, the raccoons made cute faces at the scientists when checked, which suggests that raccoons may be severely depraved creatures.

Early Days[edit]

Animal love originated in Wales a long time ago. To be precise, 903AD. When the Celtic Barbarians who at the time were at war with some other inferior race made the discovery that their furry friends, sheep, were of no more use than to sheer and use as material for the future Tom Jones' wig, they decided to experiment in different ways with the animals.

The Celts used sheep as a deterrent to keep potential invaders out of their home country. Before a potential battle commenced, they would climb to the top of the tallest mountain in Wales, Ben Nevis, and perform a ritual that could only be described as a disgusting hybrid mutation of homo-sapien consensual sex in the missionary position.


Animal Love In The News[edit]

Of course, over years to come this had spread and become popular in other countries, such as Nigeria, Iceland and France. Most notably however, Sudan. The BBC dropped in on a man giving a goat some animal love and wrote this article to document on why you should not fuck fucking animals.

Animal Love Art[edit]

Animal love is a great thing in some countries and in some subcultures, most notably Japan. Japanese anime artists try to blend human bodies with animal features, or try to be outright crude and blend animal bodies with human features. Nonetheless, below is something pretty fucking wrong: Amateur Anime Artist's "Panda" Professional Human Blasphemist Anime Artist's Fox