Ass Kicking Pirate Stormtrooper Revolutionaries

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Newspaper Advertisment for The Show

“It's like a twisted and gay mix between Jack Sparrow and a Stormtrooper.”

~ A Straight Man on Ass Kicking Pirate Stormtrooper Revolutionaries

The Awesome Pirate Stormtrooper Revolutionaries is a children's show based on the PBS Channel, and is widley enjoyed by children and adults alike.


The Awesome Pirate Stormtrooper Revolutionaries was created by Ben Franklin, and first aired in 1978 on PBS. In an interview with the show's creator, Franklin admitted that the show was originally meant for adults and teenagers, and was supposed to be titled "Ass-Kicking Pirate Stormtrooper Revolutionaries." However, when pitching it to PBS, the executives decided it should be more child friendly. The show quickly gained popularity among children, despite the fact that it is mildly violent, occasionally witty, and taught wonderful moral values. The show quickly earned a prime spot on Saturday mornings at 10. It is currently in it's 5th season, and has spawned many marketing deals, and a feature length movie.


The plot of the show is based around 5 teenagers, who create a club at their Highschool which they name "The Awesome Pirate Stormtrooper Revolutionaries", as a joke. However, when finding a place to have meetings, the gang falls through a trap door into the boiling room of the school, which gives them super powers. The group gains odd superpowers, which is one of the reasons the show is so popular. They are given Stormtrooper armour to cover their hideous wounds, and have been transformed into brilliant political minds with pirate instincts and vocabulary. The APSR becomes a full time job, as they live in the crime-ridden city of Metroville. They take the powers and armour as a blessing, and fight crime using undeniable logic and powerful pirate fighting skills. Their ass-kicking skills are legendary, and will never be forgotten by anyone.


  • Jeff- Jeff, the leader of the gang had the original idea for the club. He was also the first to fall through the trap door, and absorbed more of the chemicals that caused their powers, thus making him slightly stronger that the others. However, Jeff had polio, and thus is weakened by his poor walking abilities. The Polio that Jeff suffers from makes him seem more human to kids than many other heroes, and is thus easier to relate with.
Jose, Celebrating a Victory in the Battle against Evil
  • Jose- Jose was a foreign exchange student from Argentina, who moved to America to escape the grues that were attacking him in his homeland. Jeff was his only friend in school, and thus decided to join the club. Jose brings a racial diversity to the show, and in some episodes he teaches viewers random phrases in Spanish. In episode 32, Jose faces death when fighting a homework eating monster, until being saved by Stacie.
  • Stacie- Stacie, one of two girls in the gang, only joined because her best friend Rachel did. Stacie is the class "brain" and her new powers have given her political revolutionary ideas that would make Marx look like a chain-smoking 5 year old reading a History text book. She uses her amazing smarts to duel enemies or distract them with undeniable logic.
  • Rachel- Rachel is Stacie's "BFF" and class government president. She joined the club because she is great friends with Jeff, and wanted to broaden her horizons through different clubs. Rachel is a martial arts black belt, and is key to the success of the team. In later episodes, we find out that Rachel was abused as a child and uses her martial arts as a way to take out her inner anguish from her beatings on troublemakers.
  • Dwayne- Dwayne is the only African-American on the cast, and joined the club because he needed one club credit to be able to play basketball. Dwayne grew up in a bad neighborhood in New York, and uses his street smarts and hook-ups to get information on criminals. He also caused controversy, as a few political figures found the character to be a racial stereotype.

Fan Following[edit]

TAPSR is now one of the most popular shows for children on TV, ranking only below Grue's Clues in the Ratings chart.The show has spawned everything from fan clubs, toys, and trading cards, to t-shirts, costumes and bedsheets.

Trading Card Game[edit]

A rare First Edition Jeff Card! OMG!

The trading card game based upon The Awesome Pirate Stormtrooper Revolutionairies began in Japan, where pretty much all trading card games start. The game is played by creating a deck of twenty cards, made of monsters, heroes and "Knowledge" cards, which are used as total haxs, and pwn pretty much everything. But they are all rare, so don't worry about it. Every character card has an attack/logic score in the right hand corner. The attack is used when attacking an enemy, who must have a higher logic score than his attacker's attack stat to survive. "1st Edition Theodore Roosevelt" has the highest known logic score, at 26, and can only be defeated by the "Ur-Grue" card. The game currently has over 341 unique cards, and is still growing in size and popularity. If you play the card game and you are over 13, chances are, you will never get laid. Ever.

TAPSR Movie[edit]

Stacie being shot down by a violent criminal in TAPSR: The Movie

The Movie based upon the show, came out in the early 1980's, and was directed by Martin Scorsese. It appealed to much more than the hyper, sugar-high kids that watched it, but also to nerdy adults and people who lack any common sense. The movie blew everyone's mind away, and in fact, actually blew someone's head up. Despite raving fans going insane over the movie's superiority, many media personnel bagged on the movie because it was stealing attention from the mindless drones who watched them give their half-ass opinion on shit that no one cares about. Like Larry King on his popular show Larry King Live stated days after the release:

“This was the most bullshit movie I have ever seen. There was no plot, and the man that kept masturbating to the one girl Stormtrooper, and proceeded to touch me with half an hour left. 2 out of 5”

~ Larry King on on Larry King Live

Fans responded to this insult by egging Larry King's Long Beach estate until he came outside, at which point they made him pull down his pants and do jumping jacks while singing Nelly Furtado's Promiscuous. Embarrassing.

See Also[edit]

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