Avro Lazy

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The Avro Lazy was a British bomber, introduced into service in 1902, and retired due to defence cuts in 2006.

Developed around the Air Minstry specification "P. Anything-Goes/34", it laid claim to being the first powered aeroplane ever built. Conspiracy theorists argue that the Wright Brothers were actually in Britain, and were thus well equipped to steal the aeroplane, fly it back across the Atlantic, make a wimpish 120-yard flight in the United States and thus claim the record. After Wilbur was assassinated by Lee Harvey Oswald, however, the Royal Air Force did not dispute this.

In Service[edit]

The Lazy served in every single war the United Kingdom ever fought, and every war fought by the USA from 1903 upwards.

Battle honours, however, were not awarded for any service due to the Air Ministry being incredibly lazy, and not bothering to turn up until they were abolished.

The Lazy's name followed it around like a bad dream. Of it, Oscar Wilde said: "I have nothing to declare except that Lazy is a crazy name for an aeroplane" Wilde was flown in an Avro Lazy, when, in 86 Post-Robopope, he flew to America on the charge of being gay.


Despite being called the Lazy, the type soldiered on until defence cuts of 2004 decided that the type would be withdrawn from service in 2006. This date has, however, been put back to 2306, and is expected to be put back further tomorrow.