Confirmed Bachelor

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Bachelors sometimes congregate and put on their own crude entertainment

A Fraternal Brotherhood of mostly single men. There are various rites worldwide of which a bachelor may be confirmed. In the USA the main rites are the Fire Island Rite, the Palm Springs Rite and the South Beach Rite. Important Regional synods include the Boystown Rite (Chicago) and the Big Easy Rite (New Orleans). In Canada, the Montreal and Toronto rites predominate.

Who[edit]

Confirmed bachelors (CB) are similar to the Gays. The chief difference is there is no obvious sexuality about them. They seem to be just like the Gays in every other way. Which is to say they are just like the non-gays.

1914, Montreal Rite, Black and Blue Party

What[edit]

CBs are the male form of the popular Spinster or Maiden Aunt found in many families. Paul Lynde, Charles Nelson Reiley and JM J. Bullock are popular TV icons of the sort.

Future Confirmed Bachelors of America (FCBA) are the teen contingency of this group best represented by Urkel, Justin Timberlake and The Beaver.

Why[edit]

Some CBs grow beards. These beards are figurative in that they are actually wives with interests of their own. Separate bedrooms and checking accounts are the norm with beards. Not unheard of are maiden aunts becoming beards. A CB-beard to a Maiden Aunt is sometimes just referred to as Aunt Mary. The reason for this nickname has been lost in history.

Marble Hills, Long Island

Where[edit]

CBs have recently begun flexing their economic muscle. A neighborhood in Long Island has been developed for CBs and no women are allowed to live there. The wild and crazy bachelor pad life can go on behind the gates with no prying eyes from the neighbors, except those that are into that.

See also:[edit]

In the News[edit]

Marble Hills - A Bachelor Haven