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Creation & Early Life[edit]

Bane was created in 1987 during the Ninth Renaissance by well known cupboard maker, Dominic E. Oteri, as a prototype SMART Cupboard. This SMART Cupboard was designed to eliminate all competition in the cupbaord industry, making Oteri the most powerful man on the face of the Earth. Unfortunately for Oteri, three days after he was given life, Bane rebelled against his creator and, after setting fire to the Great Cupboard Workshop, escaped into the night. He was not seen again until the following Monday when he killed George de Groeg, the act which ended the Ninth Renaissance and sparked the Third non-World War (AKA nWWIII).

Slightly Less Early Life[edit]

He spent the next two years of his life on the run from the law. During this time he had major battles with Captain Planet, George W. Bush and Hello Kitty. he defeated the first two but was beaten by Hello Kitty, who had been hired by the UN to capture him. He was sent to Disney Land High Security Prison (DLHSP) where he learnt to harness his powers of evil and became a super-villian. It was at this time that he met a certain Dr. A. Beecee, who promised to get him out of DLHSP.

The Time After His Early Life But Before His Later Life And Most Certainly Before His Death[edit]

Dr. A. Beecee, true to his word, made a deal with the Evil Leader of Disney Land High Security Prison by which Bane could go free if he agreed to participate in a higly risky experiment. In this experiment, it was planned, that Dr. A. Beecee would use his evil powers to turn Bane into a "super soldier". If the experiment was successful Bane could go free and Dr. A. Beecee would create more "super soldiers" with which to take over the world. Unfortunately for all involved, the experiment backfired and gave Bane too much power. The subsequent surge of energy killed Dr. A. Beecee, his team of scientists and three waffles. Not only this, it brought the attentions of Oprah onto Bane.

Later Life[edit]

Oprah felt the release of power and descended upon Dr. A. Beecee's laboratory in minutes. When she arrived, she found Bane, unconsious and on fire. She put him out and, using her psychic powers, made him her slave. He served her for one thousand three hundred and thirty seven years before he was let go for failure to comply with orders. He then wandered aimlessly for several millenia. This continued until he was enlisted by the Humans to fight in the Human vs. Kitten War. This war caused him extreme grief and made him turn to crack.


Bane traveled back in time to now and is currently a anthro bisexual squirrel with a butch haircut. he can generally be found in France, Belgium, England or Pluto.

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