Bermuda Square

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“Guys, Where are we?!?”

~ Oscar Wilde on Bermuda Square

“It's hot!”

~ Paris Hilton on the Bermuda Square Islands

“Well ah rekin' it's hip tah be square!”

~ John Wayne on Bermuda Square

The Bermuda Square Islands are located about 2 kilometers left of the Bermuda Triangle but are not as famous. Discovered in the 1890s by Captain Lamberton of the Canadian space navy the islands benefit from an ElectroMagnetic anomaly and exotic dance competitions that attracts tourist (mainly men and some Borgs) from around the galaxy. Many toilet monsters also come.

History: Before[edit]

Before there was nothing, just darkness... Then came Benjamin P. Lamberton and everything changed forever. During his exploration of the universe the USS Starbuck detected the electromagnetic pulse of the Bermuda Square and that was it, Badaboom! The ship crashed on one of the 5 islands and this started it all

History: After[edit]

Lamberton found the value of the electromagnetic anomaly was such an asset he annexed the area in the name of his country Canada. It finally gained independence in exchange of a annual tribute to Celine Dion's carreer. Over the years this tradition was changed into exotic dance competitions. The Lamberton family is still at the head of the country. Today Meredith Lamberton, Queen of Bermuda Square Islands reins over the 5 islands in her big Palace called the "Bitchy Bounty"


The Islands are located around the electromagnetic anomaly called "the Bermuda Square". Contrary to the Bermuda Triangle where everything seems to get lost or simply disappear, the Bermuda Square is some kind of a worm hole expulsing on the four surrounding islands all that has been lost, misplaced or simply disapeared. Cannot find your glasses? Well I bet right now it's probably used in an erotic dance by one the 10,000 exotic dancers of this country! Out of the five islands Bistooree, Nicotini, Dunlopeelo, Tupuduku and New-New-Brunswick, only the last one is inhabitable. Over 15,000 people live in its capital city Lambertonia-Ville.
A satellite view of the Bermuda Square Islands


The economic balance of the country depending on what is lost on Earth, the Islands' production is rather unstable: Some remote controls, a few outdated navy cruisers and fire fighters, Elvis, and a lot of lost junk are the base of the local business. The lost junk is actually so big it almost covers 83% of the islands superficy. Russia contributed in a large way in the creation of the country's army by losing a few nuclear warhead weapons and a nuclear submarine. The Bermudians then sold the submarine to the Canadian army but never got paid (some misunderstanding due to a French/English translation mistake)

List of Allies[edit]

The Lamberton Memorial
  1. New Germany
  2. Australia
  3. Canada
  4. French Guiana

Major Attractions[edit]

In New-New-Brunswick Island:

  • The Capital city of the country : Lambertonia-Ville
  • The Royal Palace: The "Bitchy Bounty"
  • The Lamberton Memorial
  • The USS Pamela Anderson
Bermuda Square Islands
Flag of Bermuda Square Islands.JPG
Motto Somewhere on Earth right now it is Happy Hour!!
National Anthem In Google we Trust
Official language French and English, in a word... Canadian
Capital Lambertonia-Ville
President Her Majesty the Queen Meredith Lamberton
Government Banana Republic or GAPistan
Citizens Bermudians
National Hero Captain Lamberton
Currency Canadian Tire Money
Countries and territories of North America
Main: United States of America | Canada/Canadia | Mexico | Jesusland | Confederate States of America | Québec
Northernmost: Mediocre Britain | Canada States | Duchy of Björk | People's Republic of Canada | Awesome land/Not So Awesome Land
Atlantic: United Spades of Amerika | Wikiland
Caribbean: Barbados | Communist | Dominican Republic | Earthquake | Jamaica | Tortuga | Trinidad and Tobago
Atlantic: United Kingdom of Britannia and Northern Pangaea
Northernmost: Greenland | Gayman Islands | Acadia | St. Pierre and Miquelon | Cancanada
Gulf of Mexico: Pen Island | Tropico | Orgasm
Caribbean: Martinique | Bermuda Triangle | British Virgin Islands | Cayman Islands | Monkey Island | Puerto Rico | U.S. Virgin Islands