Blowing up

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Definition[edit]

"Blowing up" is when due to some catastrophic event, a certain object explodes splattering bystanders with its body bits. Unless it's in a G-rated movie, in which case it will just disappear. Note that there have been no recorded cases of an object "blowing up" and travelling upwards.

Suicide Bombers[edit]

With recent increases in gay people, vain behaviour, and George W. Bush still being alive, people have driven themselves to the extreme of blowing themselves up. If you are unfortunate enough to find yourself in the vicinity of such a person be wary, as it is very hard to get their intestines out of your brand new jacket.

"Suicide Wars" are when one person/party, having been the target of a suicide bombing, will send one of their suicide bombers to get revenge. The other group/person, in true vengeance style will then try to suicide bomb the other. This continues until they reconcile, run out of bombers/bombs, or get bored and write Wikipedia Uncyclopedia arcticles-possibly more dangerous than a suicide war.

Although many suicide bombers have exploded themselves onto the news, none are as renowned as Al-Zarquiri-Ari-al-Tivi. He is famous for being the only suicide bomber who survived to blow himself up another day. The target was the US embassy in Have-nuke-istan; Zarquiri, attempting to detonate the 23kg of explosives he wheeled to the embassy on a suitcase, had his bombing attempt routed by a rat which had nibbled through the detonation wires. Nevertheless, on the next day, he entered the embassy, claiming he "had left his suitcase behind" and detonated the explosive. Unfortunately for him, the embassy had recently been bomb-proofed.

Health Risks[edit]

Things blowing up in your vicinity is a definite health risk, with the dangers including:

  • Being tempted to blow things up yourself, thus creating a self-referential infinitely long and arduously boringly forever-takingly recursive repeating self-referential cylic loop, perpetuating the cycle of explosive terrorist hate.
  • You head asplode.
  • Shrapnel/sharp objects/debris/radishes travelling towards you at high speeds-these may be infected by DDS
  • General shockwave of the explosion.
  • Catching on fire.
  • Having to deal with counter-terrorists.
  • Having to deal with counter-counter-counter-terrorists.