Borth

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The City of Greater Borth / Y Dinas Borth Mawr
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Borth Skyline.
Motto: "Bydd ein trechu holl Dinas sy'n sefyll yn ei erbyn" "We will destroy anything that stands against our city"
State Wales
Official nickname The city that never wakes up
Official language(s) Welsh (Borthian Dialect)
Mayor Gruffydd Parry
Established 1833
Currency Welsh Pound

With a population of just over 2 million inhabitants, Borth is easily the largest city in Wales. It was founded in 1833 by Gwydion Wmffre Hughes as a primary port town for Mid Wales. The city has since grown at an astounding rate, partly thanks to its fantastic transport system, based around the single-platform Borth Central Railway Station, where trains leave every two hours for Birmingham, passing through the infamous Dovey Junction Railway Station. The city is also served by the Borth-Rhodri Pritchard International Airport. The city centre is situated around 225 miles west of Norwich (except in winter when it is 140 miles to the east)

Origin of name[edit]

On receiving city status in 1921, The Government decided that its original name, Llanyfarchphryiddionymadarchydd was too common in Wales, often causing confusion. A new name was thence commissioned by the city council, who asked the children of the city's primary schools to create a monosyllabic name which would reflect the excitement of the city. Thus, Borth was born.

Animalarium[edit]

Borth is home to the worlds only Animalarium. Rather than deciding to build a zoo in Borth the authorities attempted something unique, making use of the Borth’s coastal access to create a giant aquarium, for land based animals. The project took several years to reach completion but since then it has seen nearly 5 times the amount of revenue that was expected due the local’s flocking to visit its original celebration of Welsh Zoology. The animals survive using a special system created at the Centre for Alternative Technology in nearby Machynlleth. The technique has involved surgically attaching underwater breathing apparatus to all the inhabitants of the Animalarium, where the movement of the creatures converts the waste energy into oxygen. This allows the animals to avoid being found floating upside down on the surface of the giant Animalarium.

Bettsey the Sheep, the main attraction at Borth Animalrium

Aberystwyth Denial[edit]

Sign at city limits warning travellers of the Anti-Aberystwyth Laws

In recent years, the rather peculiar phenomenon of Aberystwyth Denial has been widespread throughout the city of Borth, especially within the suburbs of Upper Borth and Llandre to the south of the conurbation. It seems that many locals here deny the fact that Aberystwyth is a more influential settlement in Mid Wales, some even denying that Aberystwyth exists at all. The movement came to a head in 2005 when Borth City Council declared that geography lessons in the city's schools would omit any reference to Aberystwyth. It is well known throughout the city that spoken or written references to Aberystwyth are often punished by eviction from Borth itself. This, combined with the deliberate lack of public transport south of the city, has meant that most of the younger generations do not know what, or where Aberystwyth is.

Some have speculated that these measures were put into place as a response to the Barmouth Missile Crisis of 1951.

Claims to fame[edit]

Borth's main claim to fame is being the inspiration for the Morrissey song 'Everyday is like Sunday' This song did, however, cause mass panic and hysteria in Borth itself, concerning nuclear armageddon. This led to the construction of a large number of bunkers beneath the properties of more affluent Borth citizens, culminating in the construction of a large complex beneath the Dovey Junction railway platform (funded, at least in part, by the Dovey Junction Residents' Committee) which has recently been refurbished and is being run as a bar/nightclub. The most famous resident of Borth is Joe Scully from Neighbours who saw the light and made the pilgrimage from Australia to bask in Borth's glory.

Geography[edit]

Borth was redesigned by Mered Edmwnt Siencyn in 1802 after the great uprising of the previous year. The streets were moved to face the north, in doing so making any view of Aberystwyth impossible. Borth's streets are designed in such a way now that all roads lead directly to Rome, which is located 3.25 miles south east-west of Borth.

Borth is moved to the Netherlands from October until March, in order to avoid having to adhere to the British Summer Time hour changes. This has made train schedules to Borth Central station quite tricky to organise and implement during the winter, so a coach service from nearby Machynlleth replaces rail connections during this time.

Currency[edit]

The Welsh Pound was introduced in 1902 as a response to the Scottish Pound. The Welsh Pound is roughly (in fact, exactly) equal to the British Pound Sterling. The Welsh Pound also uses the same banknotes and coins, even though the banknotes have "Bank of England" written on them. It seems a matter of national pride that locals ignore this rather pertinent fact. The Welsh Pound should not be confused with the Welsh Pound Coal used previously in Wales, its value having been based on the value of a pound of coal, a more frequent commodity in previous times. The Welsh Pound Coal is still used in Merthyr Tydfil and Brecon.

See also[edit]

External links[edit]