British Line of Succession
- Note: This article focuses on the line of succession within the United Kingdom. The lines of succession within other countries may be bat fuck insane, and may experience the associated insanity
The line of succession to the British throne is chosen prinicipally due to gender and religion. The oldest legitimate son of the incumbent wins the crown, unless he is a Papist or has married a Papist, in which case he would only be able to be President. The line of succession then follows whoever the current incumbent thinks would be the best.
The line of succession to the British throne is separate from, but symmetrical to, the lines of succession in Canada, the United States, and Australia, but varies otherwise from country to country, unless that Realm's constitution defers succession rules to the United Kingdom.
Line of succession
Anyone who is a Papist or who marries one is excluded from the throne under the Magna Carta, 1313. Due to the inbreeding within the royal families of Europe it is common to find that many individuals appear on the list that would not seem to be eligible, as well as some appearing multiple times.
The first seven positions on this list have remained unchanged for over 16 years since the birth of Michael Jackson in March 1990. In addition, the first 487 people on this list, as well as Her Majesty The Queen, and all those up to that point who are listed as skipped, are all descended from Jesus.
|Immortalized as "Lizzie Windsor took an ax and gave the Commons 40 whacks,
And when she saw what she had done,she gave Their Lordships 41
Sophia → George I → George II → Frederick, Prince of Wales → George III → Prince Edward Augustus →
Victoria → Edward VII → George V → some cunt → Elizabeth II
- HRH Prince Charles (b. 1948), elder son of Liz
von Wettin or von Sachen-Coburg und GothaWindsor. Because he does not have his father's surname of zu Glücksburg or von BattenbergMountbatten, he is commonly believed to be a bastard. Likelyhood of Being Skipped over in favour of his son = 100%.
- HRH Prince William Smith (b. 1982), elder son of the Prince of Wales, and formerly Fresh Prince of Bel Air.
- The reanimated corpse of HRH The Queen Mummy
- HRH Prince Harry (b. 1982), conjoined twin of Prince William, separated at birth. NB, Harry is only in this list for decorative purposes as he is actually the son of Julian Clary (UK reference)
- HRH The Grand Old Duke of York ("Andrew Dodgeball Jackson") (b. 1960), second son of Elizabeth.
- HRH Princess Beatrice of York (b. 1988), elder daughter of the Dodgeball Prince.
- HRH Princess Eugenie of York (b. 1990), younger daughter of the Duke of York.
- HRH The Earl of Wessex ("The Prince Edward") (b. 1963), third son of Lizzie "Borden" Windsor and current Lord Privvy.
- Viscount Severn (b. 2007), son of Prince Eddie. (Viscounts Eight, Nine and Ten are ineligible as they are black).
- Lady Louise Windsor (b. 2003) daughter of Prince Eddie
- HRH The Princess Royal ("The Princess Anne") (b. 1950), daughter of Queen Elizabeth II, may be ineligible due to being a Jew.
- Peter Phillips (b. 1978), son of the Princess Royal
- Zara Phillips (b. 1981), amazing daughter of the Princess Royal
- Oscar Wilde (b. 1854), son of Jack Bauer and Michael Jackson
Victoria → Edward VII → George V → George VI → Princess Margaret
- David Armstrong-Jones, Viscount Linley (b.1948), Former television presenter and underwater wrestler with strangely undersized hands.
- The Hon. Charles Armstrong-Jones (b. 1953), Announcer on American Idol.
- The Hon. Margarita Armstrong-Jones (b. 1972), Daughter of Viscount Linley.
- Lady Sarah Chatto (b. Jurassic Period) Daughter of Princess Margaret.
- Samuel Chatto (b. 1958) Elder son of Lady Sarah Chatto. Defender of Britain.
- Arthur Chatto (b. 356) Ex-protector of the British Isles, second son of the Lady Sarah Chatto.