Catamites were accidentally invented by a three-year-old humpback whale who was playing with his favorite kitty in the middle of a mine field. A nuclear waste dump was located nearby and as the nuclear radiation seeped into the kitty, it fused with a piece of dynamite (which is, of course, what the mines became as the radiation reached them) and caused an explosion of such controlled destruction that the entire five feet surrounding the newly formed catamite was annihilated but the friendly three-year-old whale who was touching the catamite was completely unharmed.
It was later discovered that these catamites can choose what they destroy. They gained immediate fame as the only intelligent explosive capable of completely controlling the extent of the destruction they caused. Shortly after this, mass production of catamites was initiated by the U.S. government. Sadly, the catamites that were created had complete awareness of their supposed purpose and were understandably embittered at their lot in life.
They managed to take over the world and are currently ruling as the Coalition-of-Cute-Fuzzy-Explosive-Cuddlies-Who-Wish-Only-to-be-Acknowledged-as-Friendly-Cheerful-Creatures-By-the-Insufferable-Humans.
Catamites, we love you!