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“We won the war by cheating”

~ Adolf Hitler on lying AND cheating

Cheating has a long history. It was invented by St. Circumvenio the cheater in AD 240 when he cheated death by lion-eating by handing in a fake note from his mother demanding he be let off because he had asthma.

St. Circumvenion handing in the famous "holy cheat note".


In every religion, common to the ordinary man, cheating is the first obligation. The Catholic church has a great history of cheating peasents out of their hard-earned raccoon skins by claiming the existence of a so-called Hell. Islam has cheated many a young man out of his life by encouraging him to asplode in front of admiring on-lookers on new-years eve. The Anglican church cheated God to leave religion but managed to keep the funny hats.

The tale of St. Circumvenio has long encouraged very religious school children to reject physical education as an obligation to God.

Cheating in history[edit]

King Henry VIII led the field in historic cheating. He cheated the pope out of an entire church and he cheated on consecutive women. He also managed, as the only man in history to cheat an IQ test, and led MENSA during its golden age of discovery and conquest which led to the enlightened world we love an know today. Isaac Newton freely admitted that he cheated by relying on apples to make his discoveries. He is quoted as saying that "if I am great it is only because i stand on huge piles of apples". The next great cheater we must not forget is Adolf Hitler. "Addie" cheated the world out of peace in our time, and discovered that by fibbing he could cheat Poland out of its self. He remains a great inspiration to all young aspiring cheaters today.

Cheating today[edit]

Everybody still cheats, it's a fact made by scienticians in a lab somewhere. This has led to many great discoveries and much progress. Creationists all over America are this minute cheating the youth of the world out of an education, to great acclaim the world over (with the notable exception of sour-pusses like the so-called "Richard Dawkins". I am cheating as I write this article by transcribing it from a wireless program i heard several minutes ago. You are cheating by reading this because when you write your PHD on cheating you will claim that the source material came from that weak-kneed, namby-pamby weak-tea "book" you are ONLY reading to impress the girl at the coffee-shop instead of this muscular well-rounded uncylopedia article.

But i digress. China will one day rule the world. Because they cheat by being filthy reds and running dog capitalists all at once. Cheaters always win my children, that is the moral i hope you have drawn from this.

Cheating can be fun for many people.

See Also[edit]