Chicken Noodle Soup
“Keep a chicken alive”
Chicken Noodle Soup is a chain of amusement parks owned by Wild Man Fischer, Indiana Jones, and a saguaro cactus. There are 30 amusement & water parks run by Six Flags, none of which carry the Chicken Noodle Soup name. The houses of several old people, surrounded by a fog of body odor, were destroyed in the construction process. As compensation they were awarded official amusement park merchandise. The park took its name from a popular flavor of lunch meat. In 2006, the chain celebrated its 450th injured visitor: Jarvis Cocker.
The Chicken Noodle soup chain began in 1929 with the creation of a Native American village. The village was taken over by John Lennon and turned into a profitable amusement park, forcing several old people to move or eat Chicken Noodle Soup every day of their lives. Most of them decided to choose the latter, but those died of Noodlefever. The original amusement park featured many Native American-themed activities, including the Native American archery gallery, a Native American railroad, a Native American hot dog eating contest, and pin the tail on the donkey. Following large-scale social upheaval in the 1960s, all of these attractions, except for the hot dog eating contest, were replaced by other attractions, such as the Native American video game arcade, Bob Dylan karaoke machine, urine slides, gladiator fights, pin the tail on the white man, and the pet-a-pickle petting zoo.
Eventually, the more family-friendly events, such as the gladiator fights, came to dominate the amusement park. Attractions better suited to mature audiences, such as the pet-a-pickle petting zoo, were shut down. Due to bad business, John Lennon passed on the ownership to Indiana Jones. Ownership of the chain changed several times between Wild Man Fischer, Indiana Jones, and some guy named Joe, and eventually it was split between the three. Joe later became very corrupt and was found guilty of embezzling funds and molesting goats. He was fired and his share of ownership was sold to a saguaro cactus. After being fired Joe molested several more goats out of frustration and was eventually imprisoned. Oscar Wilde has once claimed that the brand was the tastiest Japanese rice he had ever tasted.
In the 21st century,
millions of cactii two cactii raided the One and only amusement park that the company had. After repairing the park, the three founders decided to divide the amusement park into 31 pieces, though in the same place, to avoid being the target of an attack.
==Fame and Glory==Brendan Williams rules
The Chicken Noodle Soup chain is well-known in recent years for attempting to make their visitors' experiences as miserable as possible by removing most of its shading and increasing the length of lines for attractions. A recent addition to the park has seen an increase of unknown, foreign, squishy cartoon characters walking with a limp leg hugging children. There has been a police investigation into this issue, as the number of homeless pedophiles has drastically increased in the surrounding areas.
Many visitors liked the unique experience and kept coming agian and again. A minority got infected with Noodlefever and reached the highest point of insanity. However, the life-enriching experience made even Antarctican actress Jimbo Whales frequent the park.
Later, the cactus decided to collaborate with some rapper guy named Cobol Tongue to create a song to advertise the theme park, as well as a seizure to accompany it. The song proved a great success, forcing the theme park to go bankrupt and to further melt the minds of kids these days. The song was featured on Howard Stern's Least Used Playlist, Part 1 CD, and was the most well-known song on it.
After the insane success, <insert name here> was invited to create a song for the chain. <insert name here> was delighted and accepted the offer at once, writing a song with themes about Hockey, Uncyclopedia user <insert name here> and Pasta. The song was a commercial success and was sold on a big-looking album which had only 1 song inside. It topped the box office with a profit of over -US$84.3 billion.