Clemen

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"Do I prefer clemen or semen?... What do YOU think?!"

~ Oscar Wilde on Young Boys (as usual)
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For those without comedic tastes, the "questionable parody" of this website called Wikipedia have an article about Clemen.

Clemen {pronounced ©£33-(\/)€n) is a portmanteau of the words clitoris and semen. It refers to the foul-smelling, yet sweet, liquid which comes out of a girl's thingy during a Female orgasm (but only if you're doing it right).

Roger Clemen.

National Exposure[edit]

Tom Tucker knows a lot about clemen.

This term is believed to have been in use since the middle of the 18th century, but it has recently gained notoriety thanks to an episode of Family Guy ("Patriot Games"), where newscaster Tom Tucker announced clemen as "America's hottest new curse word". Apparently nobody at the FCC had ever heard of it, as they got away with saying it on the air! Ha-Ha-Ha! Take THAT, stupid Fuck!!!

How to make it[edit]

Do you know how to Huff Kittens? Yeah... it's something like that.

Where the hell does it come from?[edit]

Ejaculation in girls seems to be aided or caused by stimulation of the area of the vagina known as the G-spot (Goochy-Coochy-Goo-Spot). The world-renowned physicist Richard Feynman has calculated the content of the ejaculated fluid is either all urine, all glandular secretion, or a combination of both. But 4 out of 5 carpet munchers agree that this is what makes it so damn tasty!

As a Pizza Topping[edit]

Finger lickin' good!

Due to the recent renewed interest in clemen, Pizza Hut has recently offered a new "specialty" pizza which they call the Screamin' Clemen Pizza!. Although sales of the new pie have been unexpectedly high, a number of whiney liberal special interest groups have complained about Pizza Hut's practice of using 10-year-old slave labor as a source for their primary ingredient. Child Labor Coalition spokesman Ann Coulter is quoted as saying, "Sure it's delicious... but have you thought about what kind of diseases the average 10-year-old Asian has?! They've been around more times than Madonna!"

Despite this bad publicity, Pizza Hut plans to go ahead with it scheduled release of a new clemen-based sauce for its popular "Dippin' Strips" menu item. Pizza Hut's spokesman, who goes by the name Jabba, said in a press release, "To hell with those crybabies. If Americans aren't allowed to get 10-year-old clemen right from the tap, we feel it's our duty to deliver it to them! And there’s not a damn thing those fascist Christian idiots can do about it! Besides, our primary duty is to the stockholders, not Jesus."

Jesus could not be reached for comment. (as usual)

See Also[edit]

External Links[edit]