Cocking

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Self cocking crossbow. Who can blame it.

Several things claim to hold the title of "cocking"; whether the act of shamelessly readying a crossbow or gun or operating a rooster farm as opposed to a chicken farm due to discrepencies caused by idiocy (see Netherlands) however cocking is quite simply the act of forcing cock into something with two or more close walls; a channel with little enough space so that said cock will undergo intense friction.

History of Cocking[edit]

Throughout history Cocking has been viewed as a sport, a pastime, and an abomination. Until recently (thanks to Chuck Norris' spectacular performances of Cocking in Walker; Texas Ranger) Cocking has been viewed as something not to be done in public. Nowadays Cocking is still frowned upon when performed in public, but similarly to vomiting it can cause chain reactions within people, and they may start to Cock uncontrollably.

The most famous incident of Cocking happened in the year 1 BC when God (James Earl Jones) came down and Cocked a fine lass named Mary. This was the first incident of Human Mating and ever since we have mated with Cocking as the preferred method. Cocking has been the reason backing many wars; the War of the Spider Queen, World War II, and, along with the advent of "Pokemon Fever", the Old Catholic Person Hate War. All of these wars ended, surprisingly, with bouts of Cocking.

Science of Cocking[edit]

Strangely enough, it has been discovered that although anyone can be Cocked, only women cannot cock. Experts theorize that this is the case due to the fact that they can be cocked from up to eight separate areas, or more if knives have been used, while most males can only be cocked from up to five. This has been rectified with the invention of the Strap-on an invention that came from the Womens Rights movement.

The mystery of where Elmer's Glue comes from points to Cocking, as the substance is produced in minimal amounts through Self-Cocking (see below) and sold to "Sperm Banks," discovered to be closely affiliated to Elmer's in 1996. When asked about the cow on the label and how it pertains at all to the Cocking Juice, representatives had no comment. Experts say Cow Cocking Juice is potently sticky. The fact that all cows are female would seem to disarm the credibility of these experts, but they say Elmer's scientists have invented a new Strap-on that will work for cows and provide grade-A cocking juice.

Cocking Today[edit]

Cocking often leads to problems for both the Cocker and the Cockee. For example the cockee may become fat and produce offspring, which must be swiftly culled or the Cocker will lose the ability to Cock properly for the rest of a five to seventy year period.

Self-cocking has been invented, allowing anyone to cock themselves, allowing for lonliness in an instance that would normally demand other people.

Monabeanhalffinished.jpg This article has a good idea and concept, but isn't finished. You can do something about it.

Several things claim to hold the title of "cocking"; whether the act of shamelessly readying a crossbow or gun or operating a rooster farm as opposed to a chicken farm due to discrepencies caused by idiocy (see Netherlands) however cocking is quite simply the act of forcing cock into something with two or more close walls