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If you were looking for storage for your recently departed, see Coffin (Corpse Holder)
German physician Dr. Doom, who discovered the STD Coffin

This STD has been canonized by the Pope for its

blessed fight against the use of evil condoms.

Coffin is a rare sexually transmitted disease that travels through anal, vaginal, and penal secretions, anyone can receive Coffins, even nuns, no one is safe.


Coffin was first discovered in 1902 by German physician Dr. Doom, the symptoms include:


There is no known treatment for Coffin, so if you have it, you are in scientific terms, screwed.